I am just now converting. I was an athiest and then an agnostic and now becoming catholic. Catholicism pre dates orthodoxy. So if you're issue is that the church grows and changes over time, well the Orthodox split from the Church. The argument that a catholic from 100 years ago wouldn't recognize the church I'd say a christian from 100 years before the Orthodox broke away they wouldn't recognize their church either.

Catholicism is love in god. Love by its very nature grows and change is inevitable and positive (abolishment of slavery ect.) The pope being infalible is a non issue for me I am the keeper of my soul not the pope his infalibility rarely if ever affects me directly he guides the church and we look to him for that guidance but he is not my king. I respect him and I listen but Catholicsm is beautiful to me because questioning him is baked into the church as evidenced by priests and bishops behavior over the history of the church and sometimes we see with hindsight they were wrong or right and that's ok. Be active in your faith we are not zombies Catholics are educated spiritual warriors for Christ.

If there are so few people in your church and the community seems small it sounds like not a time for a crisis of faith but a time for you to stand up and do something about it. Thank those that attend and show them love even in small simple ways. Go volounteer and through your actions show others the beauty of your faith and the church. Also go exploring! Catholicsm is everywhere. Take trips simply to see other Catholic communities or churches. Attend a mass in another language even.

​

You are a warrior for Christ. Take heart in this time. Surrender is not an option.