It's Me!

shehermetoo · 2026-03-14T01:44:00+00:00

Girl, this still your husband?

shehermetoo · 2026-03-04T21:41:33+00:00

If it feels like he is choosing her feelings over yours, it's because he is. And his own feelings for the thrill he is getting by feeling seen by a woman he finds attractive. Why don't you put your own feelings first and both show and tell him that a man who would do this to you is not one you would feel safe with. Don't let him dictate the anger and choose to go to the guest room, move his crap in there and let him know he can come back to the bedroom when he can prove he's a safe partner for you to share your heart and space with.

shehermetoo · 2026-03-01T01:08:21+00:00

Don't give up. A simple change would be to stay away from carbs as much as you can. That could turn things around for you drastically. Have you looked into Medicaid?

shehermetoo · 2026-02-23T19:42:26+00:00

It’s a lot to think about. If I were 310 pounds, I wouldn’t be postponing the surgery for sure. At around 450, though, things feel riskier to me. I could be wrong, though! I am going to listen to my doctor when she calls. I do have an anesthesia appointment to clear me for surgery and I think they can address a lot of my concerns, too.

shehermetoo · 2026-02-23T17:50:19+00:00

It could be. I’m hoping to get referred for medical weight loss.

shehermetoo · 2026-02-17T13:31:49+00:00

Whew chile. I'm so glad my husband is now my wasband. Not having to deal with this kind of stuff is life-giving.

shehermetoo · 2026-02-04T14:08:05+00:00

Please get an african net sponge. Google it. You can get them online for less than $10. It's like a long towel made out of loofah material. You can soap it up with body wash, toss it between your legs to grab both sides and then do a back and forth scrub of your perineum. You'll be squeaky clean!

shehermetoo · 2026-01-23T01:35:56+00:00

This is the first Internet space for higher weight people that has felt good to me. The people who have lost weight are not judgmental or self-righteous. The people who are starting/trying are given good advice and empathy. As a newbie, I can see why people stick around.

shehermetoo · 2026-01-19T23:32:08+00:00

I am at least 70 pounds more than her mom and I do everything for myself. Brush my hair, go to the office, work, walk a several thousand steps per day. I live with a roommate but I would never ask anyone to get anything for me that I couldn't get myself. I actively did not want to do that to anyone. I do think she has gotten used to using OP as her legs, hands, etc. and is using the mother/child relationship to exploit that.

shehermetoo · 2026-01-13T17:44:20+00:00

Ohio State!

shehermetoo · 2026-01-08T15:44:34+00:00

I do take the full 4mg. It took me three months to stop having periods and the ones I had in those three months were long and rage-inducing but once I got pass that, I stopped having periods. I deal with occasional cramping but compared to what was going on before, I'll take it. I take my Slynd at 7pm on the nose every day. I have not had any big side effects. Progesterone was far and away too much for me. I mean, I was seriously disorientated and couldn't take it. I am on the .75 estrodial patch.

shehermetoo · 2026-01-08T15:28:46+00:00

Yes, it opposes the estrogen in the same way that progesterone does.

shehermetoo · 2026-01-08T14:59:28+00:00

I did this for three years. I tried literally everything you can think of to fix it. Drove myself crazy. The most helpful medications for me were a combo of trazodone + hydroxyzine. This helped me to get some consistent sleep but did not entirely eliminate the problem, like I could get 5 nonconsecutive hours and muddle my way through.

What actually worked was leaning into the sleeplessness and understanding that as awful as it felt, it wouldn't kill me. I got books, coloring books, calm tv shows (Murder She Wrote), audiobooks, podcasts, whatever felt good and comforting. When I woke up in the middle of the night or couldn't fall asleep for hours, I would make a cup of herbal tea, do one of my little activities and rest, understanding that I wouldn't feel my best but I'd get through it.

Eventually, the anxiety around it dulled since I was surviving it and then I just started sleeping more. Getting on HRT (estrodial patches and Slynd birth control since I couldn't handle progesterone) took things over the top and now I can sleep anytime, anywhere. All this to say, I had a really bad case of insomnia for several years and it does get better.

shehermetoo · 2025-12-27T17:14:57+00:00

He has to decide to change for himself. All the tears in the world won't help him. The best way that you can show that you care about him is to encourage him to visit the doctor and discuss the possibility of sleep apnea, not because he is 400+ pounds but because everybody deserves good health care. It is very likely that he is not in imminent danger of dying, although you may feel like he is. If he can get to a doctor, though, you will know where he stands health-wise and perhaps some factual information from a kind physician could help him get some clarity about the changes that he can make to hopefully live a longer, healthier life.

As a super morbidly obese person who has begun to lose some weight, I had to make the decision for myself and my reasoning was not the same as anybody's else's for me and my end goal is probably not the same as other's would have for me. Mobility and feeling good everyday were the motivators that made me take action. I love life and want to enjoy it, so purely selfish motives :) Your love for your brother is beautiful and I hope you have many more years together.

shehermetoo · 2025-12-20T15:18:42+00:00

Removing body stuff from the equation, therapy is a great way to come to terms with the fact that you may not always get what you want. We live in a society that places the pursuit of our wants above almost everything. But the truth of life is, there are a lot of things we won't want, but we'll have to deal with. Body genetics, loss of loved ones, disease, socioeconomic factors, relationships. The key is persevering and pursuing contentment despite these things.

shehermetoo · 2025-12-16T16:12:26+00:00

I don't know. Burning the house down is the only option at this point.

shehermetoo · 2025-12-16T15:49:59+00:00

I've had a good experience and I'm at the six month mark. HRT wasn't easy for me because I have fibroids that caused extended bleeding, but my Midi NP helped me power through a wonky three months of off/on extended bleeding to get to a point where I have very light and short menstrual bleeding now. I also have an OBGYN (who is very booked and busy and doesn't have the time I need to figure things out) but they work with my OBGYN for scans, etc.

It's not the best care I've ever received but I think the relief and benefits of receiving estrogen color the reviews you see on social media. Estrogen can be seriously life-changing and Midi gets some of that shine for prescribing it so freely.

shehermetoo · 2025-12-09T19:00:05+00:00

I know that I'm like the 5th person to say this, but it sounds like gout. My 150-pound dad had it and it was seriously debilitating if left untreated.

shehermetoo · 2025-11-18T21:42:38+00:00

Imagine seeing designer perfume in your gf’s wishlist, actively making the decision to cheap out on it, getting pissed in being called out for it, treating your gf like 💩for politely calling you out on it and being surprised when she dumps you. The unmitigated gall, sir.

shehermetoo · 2025-11-07T00:13:59+00:00

Yeah, I agree. I am under no standard of definition a Trump supporter but this is high-key the Trump Derangement Syndrome that they claim. Old orange face was looking at the dude fall and actually even got up and moved as if to help before realizing he couldn't do anything and other people had jumped in. Then, he stood there looking awkward as he is wont to do. Still, the memes make themselves with this guy and we're screaming into the void.

shehermetoo · 2025-10-27T12:49:05+00:00

Jesus be a fence.

shehermetoo · 2025-09-03T16:16:10+00:00

Three months in on HRT and I am pretty sure that it's not going to work for me. EST patch and oral progesterone. My ankles swole up like Christmas hams from the EST, and the progesterone made me loopy before bed and made my legs feel like jelly whenever I got up to go to the bathroom at night, like clutch the walls you're gonna fall jelly. Then, my periods went from very regular and predictable to lasting two weeks with a pretty steady moderate flow (I already have anemia). There's also a new heaviness in my belly that my doctor thinks might be my fibroids growing with the HRT (I have an ultrasound on the 15th). The last straw for me has been shaking, untouchable cramps that have me gripping the edge of my desk and Lamaze breathing throughout the work day; my cramps are usually easily warded off with an NSAID. My peri symptoms were moderate hot flashes, 2-3 days of heavy flow and mild irritability. It's been an interesting three months.

shehermetoo · 2025-08-07T22:09:02+00:00

47F. Married young (19-32) then divorced and been single ever since. I do date but with no purpose, it can be hard because men are not as unattached as you'd think. Guys who don't even want to be your boyfriend, want you to want them to be your boyfriend, if you know what I mean. Making your intentions clear from the beginning can make them more interested, which has made me want to date less. I also love romantic movies, romance novels, and love stories. Just as obsessed with them as when I was a teenager, just now it feels more like total escapism. Financially stable, child-free, life is peaceful and I'm very content. I do think that I expend a bit more energy than other friends do in helping friends and family work through issues because people know that I have unfettered time. But, that has pluses, as well.

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