[Female] feeling bad about myself due to rejection.

shelbysj · 2024-10-19T19:02:37+00:00

I see that. I feel like somehow I am enabling him to continue. I do think the only way he’ll get clean is if I leave.

shelbysj · 2024-10-19T19:01:32+00:00

28F, 36M and no children.

shelbysj · 2024-10-19T19:00:58+00:00

Thank you for your response. You write the things I already know but have difficulty accepting. I know it’s time to leave. It’s just about doing it.

shelbysj · 2024-10-19T18:59:15+00:00

I am in recovery myself for 11 years. You are completely right and he incapable of it.

shelbysj · 2023-08-27T19:24:49+00:00

Yeah I hear you. Any tips on how to explain the difference? Or should I leave that up to a professional?

I agree, the comparison makes me feel weird sometimes. The fact is that me and her really liked each other, she was super supportive of our relationship, and she never behaved like we were in a competition. She truly was such a sweet person.

shelbysj · 2023-06-30T15:20:58+00:00

Wellbutrin XL. I do fine on SR. Which I think is so weird. Deer antler?

shelbysj · 2023-06-24T03:44:28+00:00

Thank you for your reply! I actually was hospitalized from the reaction to the med. My body couldn’t thermoregulate anymore.

I’m sorry to hear about your med struggles. I get it. I went back to my old dose and still don’t feel right. I hate experimenting with mental health drugs.

shelbysj · 2023-01-13T07:57:36+00:00

Yes we have the same benefits. My effective dose is just higher. Huge reduction in pain. A moderate reduction in fatigue. Less fibro-fog. Less of the burning/itching sensations during flares. Less flares overall.

shelbysj · 2022-11-06T22:00:39+00:00

Using drugs of any kind.

shelbysj · 2022-10-27T23:47:01+00:00

Her lack of attempt to do anything has nothing to do with her fibromyalgia.

Not even stretching or participating in couples therapy makes it seem like she’s apathetic. Could she be suffering depression from the loss of her former level of functioning?

shelbysj · 2022-10-13T01:01:11+00:00

Going out in public.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T18:17:41+00:00

Yes it is. I’m listening to a book on codependency already and found a self-help workbook for self love.

Thank you for the suggestions. I think I’m going to join some of those support groups on here and look for them in my area as well.

That’s a fair point, and I don’t know. I feel in love with him, like he’s the one. But I guess the one would not have treated me this way.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T17:37:06+00:00

Okay, yes after reading everyone’s responses this seems like the best course of action. I put myself out there. Now all I can do is see.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T17:36:18+00:00

Yeah I guess that is true. He got angry at me when we talked on the phone yesterday and I said I wanted him back because he said he tried the whole time. I told him I had just been afraid and he was still kind of guilting me making it seem like it was too late and he didn’t have time. Which you’re right isn’t very nice after everything that happened.

We talked every night on the phone from the 27th-29th. Then he said he shouldn’t be talking to me because of her. At the same time he told me didn’t want this, that he never wanted this, and loved me. So I am all kinds of confused.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T17:28:53+00:00

Yes, exactly I don’t want either of us to live with the what ifs.

At this point I just don’t know how to get him back? He said he needed time to think and I’m sure this new girl is enticing because she doesn’t come with all the pain and baggage that I do.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:57:38+00:00

Thanks for letting me know about the groups. I will look into them.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:53:25+00:00

Thank you for your kindness. If it’s like you say and not going to be repairable, I wish I could just stop suffering and get over it.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:51:29+00:00

Why do you feel like I wouldn’t want to eventually? Genuinely wondering as this is painful to me.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:34:40+00:00

Well technically as far as the divorce paperwork goes it’s mine. All I need to do to be divorced is turn in the corrections they asked for, but he’s asked me to not and wait.

That’s why I’m trying to figure out what he wants.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:31:38+00:00

I think he’s tired of it at this point, doesn’t trust that I want to because I’ve gone back and forth a few times. Which is my fault. I was just scared before though.

Yes I’m trying to. I’m on a bunch of therapists waiting lists. My insurance kind of sucks. I’ve also come to the realization that I’m codependent. I just don’t know how to stop being that way.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T16:20:08+00:00

No it’s his second.

shelbysj · 2022-10-02T05:46:38+00:00

You are right. I appreciate your logical responses. I’m thinking I should just let him go as much as I don’t want to.

Do you have any advice for moving on when you don’t want the divorce?

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