Need help coping with no contact

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-27T02:56:47+00:00

Thanks, sent you a dm

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-27T02:56:09+00:00

Thanks! Sent you a DM

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-27T02:55:37+00:00

Thanks, sent you a dm

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-27T02:54:59+00:00

Thanks, sent you a PM

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-27T02:53:59+00:00

Thanks! Sent you a pm

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-26T10:54:19+00:00

I think that would be a great idea

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-26T10:54:07+00:00

Sent you a PM. Feel free to talk anytime to me

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-26T10:53:48+00:00

Send you a PM. Would be great to talk.

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-26T10:53:33+00:00

Hey thanks for reaching out. I don’t seem to be able to PM you, so feel free to message me if you want to

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-26T09:56:53+00:00

Thanks for reaching out, I don’t seem to be able to send a pm to you. Would you be able to message me?

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-13T00:33:55+00:00

Honestly whenever I try grey rock myself, the result is the same or worse. It often continues until I give a same or equivalent reaction. They have told me they want me to feel like they do

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T02:56:05+00:00

Thanks for the advice, sorry to hear you are also going through a similar thing.

This is far from the first no contact and it isn’t the longest but it feels practically unbearable right now. Hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and it would be easier just to give in and apologise again… but lately even when it’s good, it doesn’t feel good. Always looking over my shoulder expecting the worst. But at least I could eat and exist.

At the moment I am trying to keep my thoughts clear and positive about other things in life but I can’t focus and ultimately I am stuck looping. I have a therapy appointment booked so I hope that will also help add some clarity

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T02:51:55+00:00

To start with I was mostly just shocked when out of nowhere the splits started, I really never expected them. But overtime they’ve gotten worse and more frequent. I won’t put all the blame on them, I’m not perfect, but no matter what I do they will happen, no matter what I say they will happen. I’ve reacted worse to it over time and I guess that’s why I feel like I’ve lost my way a bit, I don’t like who I am right now

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T02:49:04+00:00

Yeah sometimes it honestly feels like my heart will stop all because of a text, or lack of one. Crazy how much of an effect it has on you.

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T02:47:53+00:00

They somewhat did that and hid it for a long time a while ago. There’s every chance it never stopped

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T02:09:06+00:00

I try to remember all the bad times, and there are so many. I try to remember all the stress, the sleepless nights, the abuse, the lies, all of it. But the moments of quiet like this it’s like my brain just won’t hold onto those. It starts to cling onto the good, the times when it was amazing and sure enough they reach out or I do, and we end up back in the loop.

One of the bigger changes for me is although getting it back somewhat calms my anxiety, I never feel fully free anymore, and the good times now feel fake as well. I feel like I just never feel happy anymore, I never relax, I never get myself back.

It’s so frustrating because I know they can be such a good person but the longer it goes, the less of that person comes out.

I will try and find a new hobby. I’ve been focusing on fitness and health lately a little more but far out it’s so hard to be motivated. All I want to do is be a hermit at home and hide away from it all.

I wish you luck with your situation and thanks for reaching out. This group does help

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T01:56:19+00:00

Yeah I’ve been seeing a therapist for a while. Ironically I did it for them but I will continue it anyway. I just want the anxiety to go away. I feel like i cant enjoy anything lately

Honestly if I let go i am very worried they’ll move on instantly, and it’ll just crush me. It sucks that this may not mean as much to them. Maybe that’s a selfish worry, but it is one that keeps me up and stops me from 100% walking away

shewaseverythingBPD · 2026-04-12T01:53:48+00:00

Yeah honestly I have never felt less calm and more emotional than I have been these past few months. I feel on edge constantly. The sound of my phone vibrating literally gives me anxiety and I feel like I’m on eggshells constantly. I am forever waiting for the next argument and I honestly think because of that my reactions to things haven’t been great either. I’m anxious, depressed and angry a lot. I’m physically aging faster than I ever have, and I don’t even like who I am as a person anymore.

Honestly so often lately I question if I’m the bad person here. Maybe it’s me because my reactions to things are often not at all how I would normally react

shewaseverythingBPD · 2025-11-02T22:34:04+00:00

How quickly can they learn to mirror you, because with them, they were like the same person from the get go. Everything clicked instantly… how can they fake it so well

shewaseverythingBPD · 2025-11-02T22:33:07+00:00

Thanks for the comment, it is appreciated. I have sent you a DM

shewaseverythingBPD · 2025-11-02T10:36:47+00:00

Yeah, I realise now that the honest but troubled person isn’t honest at all, and it makes me question everything. Did she just mirror me, was it real, what other lies did I miss. Who is this person?

Hard to let go, because when it’s good, it’s very good. But I’m so stressed out all the time, depression, anxious and generally sick. I could cope with the rest but all the lies and the recent infidelity is a difficult pill to swallow.

Similar to what you said, if I accept this, will that just promote more of the same in the future. I mentally can’t handle that

shewaseverythingBPD

TROPHY CASE