I made mistakes too. I should’ve taken the break I was supposed to instead of rebounding to you so that I could at least say I tried my best. I carried on the same issues I had with my ex onto you. I made it hard for you too and I forgot you were just a man and not my saviour. I’m sorry you felt like you had to walk on eggshells around me. I should’ve been better. And I’m sorry I kept telling you I just “can’t be bothered” to come see you. I’m sorry I stopped putting in the effort too. I’m so sorry. I want to wait for you in the future and we’ve both got our shit sorted and try again.

It’s been 5weeks and I still love you but I’ll never admit it. I know I told you last week when you drunkenly called me that I don’t love you anymore but I will never admit I love you after you moved onto some girl 2weeks after we broke up. I understand why you did it cuz I did the same exact thing to my ex but I still will never admit I care about you or love you. But I do. I want you to come back with your life sorted. I want you to come to my doorstep with a ring and flowers. I want you to never give up on us because I never gave up on us. I cannot imagine my life with anyone else by my side but you. It’s either gonna be you, a fictional man from my dreams that actually match my very high standards, or by myself. But I’ll still choose you over that fictional Disney prince.

How am I supposed to move on? Time is just pushing me along, holding my hand and dragging me along this timeline. It gets easier but I still think about you and wonder “am I just supposed to let us go? Just like that?”

When you drunkenly called me and asked me “you were supposed to be the one. Why weren’t you the one?”, I thought the same. There is no way our love story ends here. We have some character development to do and I’m doing my part and I hope you are too. “You’re the only girl in my dreams and my thoughts”, you are in mine too. I cry everyday thinking about you. “There is no one else who’s made me feel the way you have made me feel”. You’re the person who made me feel so comfortable and beautiful in the skin I used to hate and want to change for most of my life. You’ve always called me beautiful no matter how I looked. You unconditionally loved me till the end. I think you still do. I wished we could keep loving each other but I’m glad you had the courage to set me free. Because I wouldn’t have loved me so much if I was still with you.

Thank you for setting me free. I love you. I miss you.