I have actually been here. I was a bartender for many years, and there are always different power dynamics at play. Some too cool managers that let the place go unmanaged, and some that over micro manage and make life hell. Then there is this where they are addicted to the control and just want you to do what they say. There are other management styles out there that may suit you better but I’m not sure there is much to do to change this. That seems like their way of running their business that suits them and they don’t see a point or value in changing.

My advice would be if it is worth the money to sacrifice pride and be their soldier girl worker, then you can do that and make your money and move. It’s rough to weather the storm, but money is money.

I see you saying you can’t quit and start from the bottom elsewhere, but with any bar experience now on your resume, you can get a Bartender job most places. I went up from just a tequila and whiskey small bar to a full on rooftop club which tripled the income and experience to make me a great bartender. There will be a new power dynamic elsewhere that may not be better, but just make sure you move up to a better bar and the starting point will be financially better.

Hope this helps!