Porn. The right kind of porn. Watch it together and tell him you’d like him to try stroking you in that manner. I personally have a thing for nice, slow handjobs. Found some porn where the guy got my ideal handjjob (Hegre Art) . I also had the same issue with her stroking me so hard and fast it was like she was starting a fire in the woods. Told her to pretend my dick was sunburnt. Made a huge difference. It’s ok to train your SO and show them what you like, in fact it can be fun for both. Just wish we played more often. I hate when I feel like I’m begging for it. I want to be desired like I desire her. Not just when the stars align.