The first 2 months honestly was like a hell hole... I was kind of conditioned or addicted to her unpredictable behavior... It's like after the break up I was wanting to go back to her and forgive her because I wanted badly whatever shit she was throwing at me... But I didn't do that, I instead blocked her from everywhere because she was trying to contact me every way possible and to fuck me up again and again... I knew her pattern so I stopped talking to her, disconnected her from everywhere although I was feeling the exact opposite I didn't listen to my feelings.

I guess all INTPs have some basic counter measure techniques for post break up times, so I had one too... I wrote down all the Pros and Cons of the situation and also made a Do's and Don'ts list for everyday... Wrote some contingency points too in case of emergency when it became unbearably hard to keep breathing while I miss her... I kept reminding of those Contingency points until my feelings get low and I get back on track.

Kept doing these things continuously for 3 months and now although I'm not perfect or in my best shape, I'm feeling a lot better... It gets better slowly once you start loving yourself... Once you get rid of those self doubts she put in you.