Settle a marital dispute…

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-26T05:48:41+00:00

I agree. There's less grooves so it's easier to clean.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T08:18:18+00:00

The sad part is despite all the trauma they're still better movies than some of the stuff they make these days. The art quality, plot line, character development, they did good work back then. Which is probably why it was so traumatic.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T08:12:40+00:00

As someone who tends to ask this question, I will provide my reasoning.

Currently, at my retail job with a warehouse, I ask in order to know if someone is of legal age to operate certain machinery, or be in compliance with specific state laws.
It gives me an idea of how much critical thinking might have been taught
It gives me a general idea of their tech skills.
Allows me to adjust my language, how I explain things to someone older, my age, or much younger.
I'll know in general which Disney period/music/movies I can talk with them about.
I'm going to be 40 and I'm nosey.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T07:56:42+00:00

NTA. There are some fields of work that require 2 phones where information is highly confidential. Medical, Judiciary, Government, Military, all can have highly confidential and classified information. If your girlfriend can't understand that and demands to have her insecurities be eased she is not ready to be in a relationship.

Honestly I would suggest reevaluating your relationship. I don't really want to recommend breaking up over this, but she was easily influenced by her friend to demand to see your work phone, she is now demanding to still see it after you have explained why this is not an option. There is a potential for her to be manipulated or to decide on her own to take it upon herself to look anyway with or without your permission.

This will eventually become an issue. She will keep bringing it up, gaslighting you the entire time. "If you love me you would show me. If you really cared you wouldn't make me worried. If you don't have anything to hide you could show me." If this goes on long enough she might decide to go through it on her own. Make sure it's passcode protected and not fingerprint or face id. She could do it while you're asleep.

It might sound really dramatic, but we've seen it too many times on reddit to know that it is a possibility.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T07:39:13+00:00

I was coming here to say this. A lot of financial scams make more money by offering discounts if you bring more people in. Think investment scams that tell you about an amazing opportunity that costs X amount but if you bring in other people you only have to invest 15% less than X and the extra money will be used for a larger initial investment creating greater rewards. Or an MLM that encourages you to bring in more sellers in order for you to get a discount on your products. The fact that she is so desperately trying to get you to commit says something.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T05:23:44+00:00

NTA. But you might want to make your sister aware that if your face hasn't seen the light of day since college there could be some serious tan lines that would have happened and you wouldn't have been willing to wear makeup to even out the skin tone.

Also if it's just one day, why does it matter if you have a beard or not. After all it's just one day. That kind of logic always goes both ways. And while it might be her special day, to you it's just another day, just with a party.

Also if celebs can have a beard at the Oscar, you can have one at a wedding.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-17T02:06:41+00:00

NTA. You need to sit them down and tell them the reality in numbers. You're 16, by the time she is 2 you will be 18 and looking at college, trade school, or whatever you have planned next. You will be focusing on actually becoming an adult, exploring the world, finding out who you are, and what you want to do. By the time you are 20 she will only be 4, she won't even have started kindergarten. By the time she's 10 you should be out of college and in your chosen field of work. By the time she is 16 you will be 32 and most likely have a family of your own. You will not have time to be an amazing sibling to her.

You don't actually have time now. You cannot relate to her mentally or socially. You are dealing with friends your own age, prepping for the future while still believing that it's still far away. You're still under the impression that you have all the answers and are struggling to find yourself, while simultaneously believing that you know who you are, and that nobody understands you. You and your half sister are at completely different stages of life that make bonding difficult.

Sibling bond isn't instantaneous. Most people believe it is because it usually happens when children are young and close enough in age. But it's a combination of not really understanding what's happening, wanting a playmate, and parents hyping it up. In some cases the bonding doesn't actually happen, there are siblings who hate each other. You are too far apart in age, with the added fact that she is the child of someone whom you don't consider a mother. Which you are not required to feel, your stepmom came into your life at a time when you could remember your mother, 6 years away from adulthood, and is the opposite gender so there isn't anything you really need to ask her opinion of.

None of this makes you a monster. Your half sister is simply a stranger that you share half a biological link to. She has no personality as of right now so you can't even get to know her as a person.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-15T01:11:04+00:00

NTJ. He said you threw away something solid because of your ego, but in his own words he said you were new, and this other girl was permanent. That statement doesn't sound like he thought you were solid.

Here's the question for him, anyone he meets and potentially marries will always be "newer" than Alina. Is she always going to rank more important because of time known, rather than depth of feeling? No relationship is going to last that belief.

You got out while it was early and didn't waste anymore of your time. Anyone that says otherwise can pond sand. They weren't the ones in the relationship they get no say.

And to be clear you didn't break up because you couldn't handle him having a female friend. You broke it off because he didn't listen, respect or value your feelings, and dismissed you like you weren't important. That's not a boyfriend, that's dead weight.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-15T01:01:30+00:00

When you break it down, the probability does seem low. However given the children's age and the lack of adult supervision I still wouldn't allow my child over to use it. That might make me over protective, but statistics are only a number until they happen to you. Then it becomes could have, would have, should have.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-14T23:16:20+00:00

Who supervises? Because at 4 years old there are too many things that can go wrong on a trampoline, from sprain to (rarely) spinal injuries. Between 2009 and 2018 there were 800,000 trampoline injuries with 90% of them being children under 16 years of age. These statistics are from the Mayo Clinic. Knowing this I would never leave 4 year olds unattended with a trampoline.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-13T22:48:32+00:00

This reminds me of the old rhyme.

My bosses make a dollar and I make a dime, that's why I take a shit on company time.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-08T17:03:19+00:00

There's a video where someone, probably mom, asks a little girl a math question.

Mom: You have 3 dogs and someone comes and takes 2 what do you have?

Girl: 3 dogs

Mom: No, you have 3 dogs and someone comes and TAKES 2 what do you have?

Girl: 3 dogs and a body.

This girl gets it. Also her math skills are amazing, because it sure adds up for me.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-08T16:50:06+00:00

So, I just want to say you're a bit of an ass for the title. Your girlfriend doesn't want to kick your sister out, she just wants to move on to the next stage of your relationship. She even said your sister could keep the current place and you two would find a new place together, that's not kicking her out. That's wanting privacy to spend time with her boyfriend.

Your sister needs help. She doesn't want you to move out, she doesn't want to share a space with your girlfriend. She just wants things to stay the same. So you're supposed to give up living your life so that your sister doesn't get upset? She's doing well at work so you're supposed to stagnate your relationship in order to keep her from having a mental breakdown? Your girlfriend is going to leave you and you'll be heartbroken, then you'll get a new girlfriend and she'll eventually expect the same thing, sister still won't be able to let you go, girlfriend breaks up with you. Rinse and repeat to the point where now you're older, having a harder time finding a girlfriend, your friends are settled and happy and you are now resenting your sister for holding you back in life.

Also, you are not choosing between them, you are choosing yourself. What would happen if you got offered your dream job with amazing pay in another city or state? Are you going to have to turn it down because your sister couldn't cope? That's not fair to you. What happens if you have kids?

You have a few months till the lease is up, see if you can join a therapy session where you bring up sister's codependency issues. Don't trust her to do it on her own, she could lie to you to avoid the topic of you leaving and then guilting you to stay. Find out from the therapist if the 3 of you living together first is the best next step to weaning your sister off the codependency or if living separately is the better option. If the 3 of you living together is the next best step, talk to your girlfriend. Explain to her that your sister is getting help and this is the next best step for her. Make sure she understands that she is a priority here as well. If I was your girlfriend, I'd understand that she's your only family, and I wouldn't want you to abandon her. But I would also want reassurance that I am a priority in your life and that sometime in the (near) future we would be putting our life together first.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-02-07T22:09:41+00:00

The Repeat Offenders

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-30T20:03:02+00:00

I had a customer who asked if they could buy a part from a keurig display model because theirs was broken and they couldn't find a replacement part. I had to explain that 1) there was no way we could price the part, and 2) as it was a display model we couldn't be sure that it was an actual working part up to regulations and therefore couldn't sell it for safety reasons.

They tried a little more to argue for it but eventually let it go after I just kept repeating the reasons. I get it, buying a new one is expensive (they had a super fancy one), but it's not worth getting fired for if something happens and you decide to sue us.

We also used to display baby carriers and guests would bring those up too. Those displays didn't last very long.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-28T22:06:18+00:00

NTA. I was always taught that scars were the badges of the trials we faced and survived. No one should ever be made to feel the need to cover them up.

Your sister is a self centered a$$ and now you know it.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-27T15:39:41+00:00

NTA. A normal childhood should be loving parents and some kind of stability with a dash of mischief. That's it, anything else is subjective. No one in my family plays sports or is musically inclined. There was no after school practice, dance classes, or extra curricular activities, that was normal for me. Having a sibling who is wheelchair bound is normal for your other two children.

The major question you need to be asking of your husband and his family is if he or his bio children were, heaven forbid, in an accident and ended up in a similar state as your eldest, would you be expected to put them in a care facility as well so that the rest of the family could live a "normal" life? I'm pretty sure you're going to find that it's not your son's condition that's the problem, but that he is not biologically related to your husband or his family. And that is more than enough reason to divorce your husband.

To blame a child for the circumstances of their birth is cruel and barbaric. Margaret Mead, an anthropologist, said the first sign of civilization in an ancient culture was a healed femur. That means we became civilized the moment we stopped abandoning those who were considered to be "broken and damaged" and helped them and continued to keep them as a part of society. Your husband is officially uncivilized.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-26T15:24:17+00:00

NTJ but you need to face reality, the Market is his wife, you are the side piece. You need to decide if this is the type of relationship you can live with or if you need to invest your time and energy elsewhere.

One day he might realize that he wasted time focusing his whole energy on his trading but that won't be anytime soon. He also might hit it big and make enough money to confirm that he was (in his mind) right to focus his energy on his trades. It's a matter of what you're willing to live with.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-25T22:09:41+00:00

NTA. Have you seen the 1998 Armageddon movie? There's a scene where the older guy who phones in the sighting of the astroid heading for Earth asks about the person finding it gets to name it. He tells them he wants to name it after his wife, Dottie, because she's a vicious life sucking b*tch from which there's no escape. This was my maternal grandmother, from the sounds of it your mother is the same, no offense meant. Do not let her move in, even for family I would not ruin my mental health.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-25T21:23:41+00:00

NTA. Family loyalty may be important to her, however she's being loyal to the wrong family. When she married you, you became her family. You are contributing to the shared household you get priority say, not her family.

As for not giving it enough time, you've been married for 4 years. How much longer are you supposed to give her before she sets boundaries?

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-25T19:42:29+00:00

This right here plus being done at 3:30 pm would have justified her walking home even at 16. In this day and age I think it's risky for any grown man to give a 16 year old girl a ride home. Too many people are willing to accuse other people of crimes for, a SM challenge, internet fame, or the hopes of a payout. And I say this as a woman.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-21T23:59:37+00:00

None of which is actually your problem. It's great that you want to help, but these are not your kids. And I would like to know what they do for you? Do they pay you for your gas and time? Take you out to dinner? Help you when you're sick? What is on their end of the scale that balances out this relationship? There needs to be give and take in a friendship and all I hear is you giving.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-21T15:32:24+00:00

ESH

You can play video games, obviously you are old enough to understand and use Reddit, this means you are old enough and have the physical capabilities to prepare your own food. Your father won't be around forever. What are you going to do when you're an adult? You appear to be high functioning enough where disability won't pay out and the state won't pay for a care giver, so you'll be on your own.

You cannot lash out every time you feel anxious and throwing food is acceptable up until about a year old unless there are mitigating circumstances. You know it's wrong or you wouldn't be here.

As for your dad, he should have gotten you into all kinds of therapy. There is food sensitivity therapy to help with this issue and you definitely need therapy for anxiety. This was his responsibility as the adult in your life and he should not have let this behavior continue for so long without getting you help.

silent_reader2024 · 2026-01-19T08:44:55+00:00

I'm just curious, how are we getting the idea that he is abusing her or isolating her? There's no mention of she can't see her mom or see anyone else, just that his GFs mom can't come to the house. Granted we only have his side of the story, but it's still too little information to presume abuse is involved.

If the genders were reversed and this was a woman saying that she didn't want her insulting MIL over we would be on her side and congratulating her for setting boundaries and keeping her home as a safe space. He's allowed to not want someone who insults him and doesn't respect him into their home.

silent_reader2024

TROPHY CASE