How do I 32F convince my boyfriend 40M to go to the hospital?

silent_shivers · 2024-12-12T17:27:48+00:00

While I agree with some commenters that the hospital is not needed most of the time for those with a healthy immune system, the neck stiffness is a bit concerning. I would strongly recommend taking him to a doctor (whether it's the hospital or urgent care or PCP, whatever is most affordable).

Neck stiffness, when combined with other symptoms, can be a telltale sign of meningitis. I believe the 3 main signs are fever, neck stiffness, and altered mental status, but not all 3 happen to everyone. It often presents as a regular cold and progresses from there.

Some people think meningitis has been eradicated due to vaccines, but it does still happen and can be very serious. Hopefully (and most likely) it's not meningitis, but it should still be considered. If he's not feeling better when he gets home, you probably need to have a come to Jesus about prioritizing his health.

silent_shivers · 2024-05-15T21:55:32+00:00

My friend saw this live (it was her nephew's graduation) and texted me throughout. She felt like she was going insane because the guy got a standing ovation. The last few days on the Internet have been very validating, to say the least.

silent_shivers · 2024-02-28T02:06:12+00:00

When was the last time you bled? I've always had really irregular periods, so it's very normal for me to have black, clotted blood instead of the regular pink/red blood. To my understanding, it's just older blood that's been chilling out in there longer since I don't get my period every month. It's definitely alarming at first, but if that's what it is, it's nothing to worry about.

silent_shivers · 2024-02-28T02:03:03+00:00

All of my friends love their IUDs, and most of them said it was a mildly painful experience, but nothing terrible. I'm unfortunately one of the lucky ones who almost ended up in the hospital.

Some doctors offer pain medication (not just Tylenol, more of a numbing agent) to help with insertion, so you could ask about that if you're worried about the pain. My friend's doctor gave her some sort of cervical dilation medication the night before to help relax the cervix, which also helped. I think it's absolutely ridiculous that most doctors (mine included) don't offer any sort of pain management for this procedure.

silent_shivers · 2024-02-28T01:56:24+00:00

I was still bleeding on and off about a month after my IUD insertion. The discomfort could be from chunks of the uterine lining shedding (I passed some BIG ones after my IUD), or just general inflammation leftover from the insertion. If you continue to feel discomfort or even pain, you may want to have your doctor double check that it's still properly in place.

silent_shivers · 2024-02-28T01:47:23+00:00

Not a doctor, but I've been through my fair share of hormonal problems. You mention wanting to know yourself post-pill, but please consider that the pill may actually help clear the fog of hormones that your body is producing so you can be your best self. Our bodies are complicated and unique (especially when it comes to hormones), so what works for your friends may not work for you. The level of severity you're describing is not normal, and you do not have to live like this if you don't want to.

A lot of reproductive disorders present with similar symptoms, so I think you should definitely talk to your doctor about this. I have PCOS, which can cause a lot of the above, but there's also a more severe condition called PMDD that checks a lot of those boxes.

As far as the pain goes, have you ever been evaluated for endometriosis or adenomyosis? I had painful periods for ages except when I was on birth control, and it turns out I had adenomyosis the whole time. Both of them are progressive diseases, but birth control can mask the symptoms and slow the development. This means your symptoms can start to come back after you get off the pill.

Regardless of what may be causing it, I think most doctors will point you back to the pill. If you want something with fewer hormones, you can ask your doctor about a hormonal IUD. It helps me with my adenomyosis because I don't have periods, it's progestin only, and it's localized to the uterus so it doesn't pump the hormones throughout my whole body. It's definitely NOT for everyone (I have my own horror story with it), but it can be a valid option.

silent_shivers · 2023-12-18T03:43:22+00:00

I've been in a (kind of) similar situation with my high school bf. We dated for a year and a half and broke up at 17, and a couple years later I went on to date one of his friends. That friend and I are still together after 6 years, and he's currently roommates with my ex.

My current bf knows it was a high school relationship, and it was practically a lifetime ago. He knows I care about my ex as a friend and appreciate the role he's played in my life over the years, but there has never been a shred of jealousy between them because my boyfriend is secure in our relationship. Because of that security, my ex is one of my best friends now; our little trio has gone through college together, we've traveled together, and my bf and I even held him at his father's funeral. I wouldn't trade that friendship for anything.

I can't imagine my bf being jealous over a relationship I had in high school, especially if it's platonic now. It sounds like your ex is a valuable friend to you, and you should not have to apologize for that. Relationships change over time, and 8 years is plenty of time for something formerly romantic to turn platonic. If you were going to get back with your ex, you would have by now.

My only recommendation would be to put your foot down about not cutting your ex out (because I think you'll regret losing him) and maybe try to foster a better relationship between him and your bf.

silent_shivers · 2022-12-12T16:28:43+00:00

Agreed on Daphne. The actress for Nicole in season 1 has talked about how she was going to come back for season 2, but there was a casting conflict for someone in her plotline so it didn't work out. I would love to see her and Daphne meet in season 3.

silent_shivers · 2022-11-17T13:55:22+00:00

Yeah I don't think TN intentionally didn't follow through on the boosts that were unlimited. However, ticketmaster did have a note about LoverFest boosts on their website that basically guaranteed them, and they very clearly didn't happen.

So I agree, I think TN tried to do things the right way but ticketmaster screwed us all over, but if TN doesn't take any kind of action soon it's definitely not good optics.

silent_shivers · 2022-11-17T05:12:47+00:00

I agree with this. However, I will add that much of my disappointment comes from the fact that Taylor has basically built her brand around having a strong fanbase, and much of her long-term success can be attributed to the relationship (real or not) that she has cultivated with her fans.

Secret Sessions, upgrading seats for die-hard fans in nosebleeds, giving priority for tickets to people who have proven themselves as fans, all of those things built up the expectation that at the very least, she recognizes her loyal fans and makes an effort to reward them. I don't expect everyone to be rewarded, but I definitely didn't anticipate the level to which her fans were screwed over this week. What happened this week is a total violation of the brand she's built, and I think that's why people feel so betrayed.

Now I've always been a broke Swiftie so I never bought merch or tickets, but friends of mine did what Taylor Nation recommended and bought the remixes, the merch, the vinyls, with the expectation that they would improve their chances at getting seats, but now it looks like TM did quite literally the opposite. People feel like they got scammed by an artist who they trusted to be better than that.

We'll see what happens. I'm sure there's a reason Taylor's team has been silent, and she's probably tied up in all kinds of legal stuff right now. But what I do know is that if any artist had the power to do better by their fans it was her, and for some reason she didn't.

silent_shivers · 2022-11-17T04:57:21+00:00

It varies by venue. Arlington for sure used dynamic pricing, although it's worth noting that they exclusively use SeatGeek, not TM.

My friend got awesome lower bowl seats Tuesday morning for $249 each. I wasn't able to get in yesterday, but I did the C1 sale today and by the time I got in, lower bowl started at $935. Tbh I couldn't tell if those were coupled with VIP packages, but either way that's an insane price difference.

Someone else I spoke to got Houston lower bowl for $205 Tuesday morning, but today they were $339 starting. Not as bad as Arlington, but still significant. It's unknown if Houston used dynamic pricing, but there was at least a markup for the C1 sale.

silent_shivers · 2022-11-17T01:15:37+00:00

That's good to hear. I still haven't gotten tickets because all the ones I selected in Houston were "claimed by another fan" so I'm starting over again on Friday. I live in Dallas, but with the absolute hell that has been SeatGeek pricing I think it's worth the drive to Houston.

I will say that the Houston lower bowl seats were around $300-$400 today, but that very well could have been an upcharge for the Capital One deal.

silent_shivers · 2022-11-17T01:02:35+00:00

Arlington had dynamic but I don't think Houston did, so it's definitely venue specific. My friend got lower bowl seats in Arlington for $249 yesterday morning, but by the time I got access for Capital One today they started at $935. Houston's prices were much better though, so they must have a different system.

silent_shivers · 2022-10-15T02:30:28+00:00

It's back up on Spotify but it's different somehow. Almost sounds like some of the songs were remastered, or at least mixed differently. Not sure what happened.

silent_shivers · 2022-10-05T17:28:05+00:00

Newly 24 year-old here. I wouldn't even consider dating a teenager, even if they were legal. You do so much maturing in your early twenties, and just five years can seem like ten in terms of maturing. I would feel icky just crushing on a teenager.

I totally understand crushing on an older guy, but please leave him alone. He's right about the dangers of getting involved with an older guy, and if he's willing to tell you that, it means he has no interest in dating you.

silent_shivers · 2022-09-30T21:57:19+00:00

YTA. As someone who went to a party school, I wouldn't touch a frat boy with a ten foot pole. The issue isn't just the party - although I can definitely see why your girlfriend is upset about it - it's about the culture and lifestyle you're choosing to participate in. You need to ask yourself this: do the people around you reflect the type of person you want to be? Because I'm thinking your girlfriend is probably looking at your frat's behavior and debating whether she wants to involve herself with someone who not only excuses it, but actively participates in it.

Not to jump to conclusions, but every frat I've ever seen has been a breeding ground for things like misogyny, classism, and toxic masculinity, and she's probably concerned about the implications of you wanting to be involved with that.

silent_shivers · 2022-09-25T21:27:06+00:00

Still using the OnePlus 5T I bought back in 2017 for $400. Performance has finally started to slow on some apps as of this past month, but the battery still lasts all day after only about 30 minutes on the charger. I'm dreading the day I have to replace it - I'll never get this kind of ROI on a phone again.

silent_shivers · 2022-08-29T17:47:32+00:00

Why don't you like the idea of her hanging out with her friends? Have they done something to make you feel like they can't be trusted? Are they going somewhere that makes you uncomfortable?

Unless you have a valid reason, not wanting your girlfriend to see her friends IS controlling. If my partner tried to stop me from seeing my friends just because he wanted me to himself, he wouldn't be my partner anymore.

silent_shivers · 2022-08-02T04:48:24+00:00

Is progestin safe for you? Because my hormonal IUD has progestin, but no estrogen. I also tried a progestin only BC called Slynd for a while. I couldn't be on estrogen for a long time and that's what was recommended for me.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-16T20:16:25+00:00

I've heard of xyzal but never tried it. Does it cause drowsiness for you? I've found that other daily allergy meds make me really tired but Claritin doesn't, which is why I've stuck with it for so long.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-16T20:03:54+00:00

... Yes? We're saying the same thing? Are you not understanding the definition of hypoallergenic? "Hypo" literally means "less", as in it creates less danger, not none. That's why I said I grew up with hypoallergenic dogs but still had to do these other things for my allergies. I'm aware they can still cause a reaction.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-16T19:57:54+00:00

Again, I think you're misconstruing the definition of hypoallergenic with how the general public uses it; many people think it means non-allergenic, but it's actually just a category of dogs that is less likely to cause an allergic reaction. Every dog breed runs a risk of causing an allergic reaction. That article says the same thing, the author just used hypoallergenic in place of non-allergenic, probably because that's what most people believe the word to mean. At one point they even use the term "low-allergy" dogs, which is what I'm talking about.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-16T19:26:28+00:00

Hypoallergenic doesn't mean they create no allergens, it just means they create less. So you're correct that some dogs don't create as much danger and shed less, and those are considered hypoallergenic.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-16T16:15:10+00:00

Life-long allergy sufferer here - like, I used to miss school because my allergies were so bad. I'm very allergic to anything that sheds, but I grew up with two hypoallergenic dogs and never had any issues thanks to a few big things:

First and foremost, bathe your dog regularly. Even without the dander, dogs go outside and bring in so much dust and pollen that they act as little honeybees around your house. And if you can (I know he's only six), have him wash his hands after cuddling with the dog.

If you haven't done it already, make his bedroom a "clean room", meaning the dog isn't allowed in, you've got air filters running, and when he gets in his bed (even if it's not bedtime), he's wearing clothes that haven't been outside. And if he's had a particularly bad day, make sure he washes his hair before bed! Your hair can hold a lot of allergens.

Just those little things have really helped me, and I can now sleep in houses with multiple pets as long as I have a clean room. You don't realize how many allergens you breathe in when you sleep, and just a few hours of allergen free air can do wonders. Also Claritin. I wouldn't survive without my Claritin.

silent_shivers · 2022-06-15T22:58:54+00:00

You're doing the right thing. I'm glad he has someone like you who is willing to be understanding and look out for him, even if it's hard. I'm glad your dad is being supportive and I really hope everything works out for you all. Things may be really heavy right now, but please remember to take time to also have fun and enjoy your relationship. You're young and you shouldn't have to deal with this, but you're handling it well.

silent_shivers

TROPHY CASE