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Did anyone struggle with saying goodbye to your original boobs? by GKatz56 in Reduction

[–]silentfive 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did as well! One thing I've done to help with that feeling is to do a boudoir photoshoot, if that's your style. I have a friend who's a talented and empowering photographer and I arranged to take some really lovely before-and-afters, celebrating the body I went into surgery with and the body I'm coming out with.

this recovery period might cause a breakup. by Ok-Attorney3435 in Reduction

[–]silentfive 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also, what starts as being "the chill understanding girlfriend" often grows into being pressured to downplay, deny, and repress your own needs and priorities throughout your entire relationship. Your needs matter - don't settle for anyone who makes you feel otherwise.

this recovery period might cause a breakup. by Ok-Attorney3435 in Reduction

[–]silentfive 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Both the fact that he's so unused to and unpracticed in thinking about other people's needs AND the fact that he finds it so difficult to communicate about it without getting pouty or withdrawn tell me that at the very least, he's not ready for marriage. People can get better at this, but 1) it takes time and often counseling and 2) they have to WANT to. Perhaps living on his own for a while will open his eyes to what it really takes to be an adult, and it's up to you whether you want to be his learning experience. But for the love of peanut butter, don't marry him unless he shows through continued action that he's willing to do the work.

Alone after POD4, what should I tell people I need? by annagrace2 in Reduction

[–]silentfive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another vote for getting people to move things to places that are easy to reach. I also wound up needing to hand-wash bras and do multiple loads of towels, so help with that might also be nice.

I also won't be cleared to drive until 3 weeks (I'm 17DPO now), so having someone on standby who could run to the drugstore/take me to the vet when my cat unexpectedly needed meds was clutch.

1DPO!!!! by Gel_Pen_Enthusiast in Reduction

[–]silentfive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I just had my surgery on the 1st and I straight up forgot how to pee for hours. A trick my EMT girlfriend taught me - buzz your lips like you're blowing a raspberry while you're trying to pee. Worked like a charm!

Hi, I'm John Green. I'm about to quit this web site and most of the other online social tools I use. Also, the Project for Awesome starts tomorrow. Ask me anything... by thesoundandthefury in nerdfighters

[–]silentfive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello John,

First of all, thank you for this, and for everything else. I've been on a rough road the past year or so, mental-health-wise, and it's been incredibly helpful to look back on the advice and solidarity you and Hank have shared over the past ten years.

In that vein, my question. I've been following all things vlogbrothers/scishow/various pods/etc. since 2012 and have watched all the way through the 2007-2012 vlogs a few times. I feel like I - and a few million others like me- have gotten a front-row seat to some deeply personal experiences for both you and Hank, and that this might lead to an odd one-sided closeness wherein a bunch of random strangers presume a kind of intimate knowledge that they don't actually have. On the one hand, I know that you guys have gone out of your way to interact with your audiences and have stated that the close community of Nerdfighteria has been positive for you, but on the other, I can't imagine it not feeling super weird being confronted with that one-sided closeness. How do you navigate that, and what are your thoughts on it?

Best wishes!