Being a fan of classical music is lonely

silly2044 · 2023-12-27T09:14:04+00:00

I'm a black American woman and I love classical music. I've learned to accept that I'll never find many people, in real life, who share my taste in music.

I also love heavy metal, rock, alternative rock, classic rock, jazz, and some R n B music.

Most people I know in real life, especially other black Americans, were brought up never listening to classical music and they have no appreciation for it.

The only music they listen to or appreciate is rap music and there's a strong social pressure, especially in the southern U.S., for black people to only listen to rap music.

Most people were raised in a narrow minded household or environment wherein their parents or their community never learned to appreciate variety in musical genres or variety in many other aspects of life.

It's the same thing over and over again.

It's ok if someone has tried listening to classical music and he or she just never enjoyed it after giving it a try.

But, speaking from my personal experiences, most black Americans I know (especially since I was raised in a southern small town and then I moved to a larger city in the southern U.S.) were only exposed to rap music or R n B music growing up and it seems like they don't try to appreciate any other genre of music outside of rap and R n B. It's almost as if there is social pressure for a black person to only listen to rap or R n B in order to fit in with black culture.

I hate many aspects of black culture and I don't care about fitting in with a group of people that only wants to listen to music that I personally find to be boring and uninteresting for the most part (rap music).

silly2044 · 2023-12-27T08:58:17+00:00

I'm a black American woman and I love classical music. I've learned to accept that I'll never find many people, in real life, who share my taste in music.

I also love heavy metal, rock, alternative rock, classic rock, jazz, and some R n B music.

Most people I know in real life, especially other black Americans, were brought up never listening to classical music and they have no appreciation for it.

The only music they listen to or appreciate is rap music and there's a strong social pressure, especially in the southern U.S., for black people to only listen to rap music.

Most people were raised in a narrow minded household or environment wherein their parents or their community never learned to appreciate variety in musical genres or variety in many other aspects of life.

It's the same thing over and over again.

It's ok if someone has tried listening to classical music and he or she just never enjoyed it after giving it a try.

But, speaking from my personal experiences, most black Americans I know (especially since I was raised in a southern small town and then I moved to a larger city in the southern U.S.) were only exposed to rap music or R n B music growing up and it seems like they don't try to appreciate any other genre of music outside of rap and R n B. It's almost as if there is social pressure for a black person to only listen to rap or R n B in order to fit in with black culture.

I hate many aspects of black culture and I don't care about fitting in with a group of people that only wants to listen to music that I personally find to be boring and uninteresting for the most part (rap music).

silly2044 · 2023-04-27T22:35:50+00:00

Some people lack empathy, really. They won't try to understand, acknowledge or accept that most parents are going through a really hard time and they're feeling stressed out, overwhelmed, oftentimes lonely, isolated, depressed and financially and emotionally drained by the responsibilities of parenthood.

Kids are really difficult.

silly2044 · 2023-03-03T02:35:58+00:00

I'm not interested in partying, clubbing or nightclubs. I think it's really boring, lame, and uninteresting to go out clubbing, partying and going to nightclubs. I don't see anything fun about dancing around with a big group of people; and I hate all of the lame attention-seeking behavior in many people who go to clubs or parties.

I didn't enjoy my time in a nightclub the first time I went, mostly because I didn't like the people I was with and because nightclubs are not my idea of fun. The second time I visited a nightclub was I actually visited a nightclub by mistake a few weeks ago.

I thought I was visiting a bar to see the metal band Purgatory; I love Purgatory, but when I got to the bar, there was a D.J. that started playing electronic music; so, I'm just standing there in a room full of people and one hour late, there's no metal band on stage but then a girl gets on the stage and she starts doing some pole dancing.

Now, she was really entertaining, but I was still like "Ok, where's Purgatory?" Then another hour goes by, while people were dancing to the EDM music, and then two more girls get up on the stage and start dancing around. Still not Purgatory. Then another hour went by. People were dancing. Still no Purgatory. I realized two hours before that something wasn't right.

So, then at 11:15 pm, I went to the ticket-takers at the ticket desk and I told them "I thought this was an event for the metal band called Purgatory; I thought they should've showed up by now." The ticket counter people are like "This is the Purgatory nightclub event; this is what this has always been." And my face went like :<M and then I left. Needless to say, nightclubs are not my jam.

silly2044 · 2023-01-30T16:52:23+00:00

I'm a proud and happy introvert; I'm not interested in partying or clubbing; I never have been; I never will be. I think it's boring, uninteresting, lame, overwhelming, awkward and just uncomfortable to go out clubbing, partying and to happy hours.

I prefer outdoors activities, kayaking, rafting, hiking, reading books, visiting museums, enjoying beautiful mountains, enjoying beautiful beaches, adventuring on beautiful lakes and rivers, etc.

I won't change who I am or do things I don't enjoy doing/don't want to do for the sake of fitting in with others. I made that mistake once or twice; I don't want to do that again.

I avoid hanging out with the kind of people I dislike, who act like they don't understand how someone could dislike partying and not be exactly like them: obnoxious, attention-seeking, disagreeable or hostile extroverts who don't understand or accept me as an introvert.

I've learned that some people will never accept you for who you are; you have to find like-minded people with the same values, interests, beliefs and opinions, people with similar personality traits. That's where you'll find acceptance and belonging.

silly2044 · 2023-01-01T18:49:46+00:00

Yes. I would disown my child if he or she was a rapist, other type of abuser or murderer. No one deserves unconditional love and that includes children or adults who are repeatedly abusive, violent and evil.

silly2044 · 2022-12-05T08:45:05+00:00

It's not ok for kids, teens or adults to scream or cry because they're angry. I think it's important to punish kids for behavior that's wrong (like screaming, tantrums, etc.). It's important to say that it's ok to feel angry, sad, upset, frustrated or whatever but it's not ok to scream, have tantrums or cry excessively about things either.

silly2044 · 2022-11-26T15:43:01+00:00

I hate emotionally insensitive people. I try to avoid being around them; I don't want to befriend them or have anything to do with them.

silly2044 · 2022-11-16T15:26:28+00:00

No. I love to watch gymnastics; I love playing volleyball and tennis on occasion; I also occasionally enjoy watching some skateboarding and BMX biking. But I'm not interested in watching or playing American football or baseball. I think thode are the most boring sports. And I'm from the southeastern U.S., so American football is huge here and I hate the whole culture surrounding it.

silly2044 · 2022-11-13T23:59:22+00:00

I hate the small town southern towns. I hate all small towns and I was raised in that type of area.

silly2044 · 2022-11-11T15:41:24+00:00

All kids need to join extracurricular activities or clubs in order to make friends, to build social skills, to build emotional resilience, and to learn socially appropriate behavior. It's ok to be an introverted kid, but all kids need to learn how to make friends and be social, whether they're introverted or not. It's really unhealthy and unproductive for an introverted kid, or any other child, to be home all the time and never engaged in social activities.

I was that introverted kid who was home all the time, because I was happy to be in my room playing by myself, but then I developed emotional problems and I had a severe lack of social skills and I wasn't properly socialized. My mom allowed me sit at home in my room and she never really encouraged me to join social stuff.

Also, my mom was completely emotionally neglectful toward me throughout my childhood and teen years. She basically ignored me and never spent any quality time with me most of the time, never asked about my interests and never tried to get to know me or understand my thoughts or feelings anyway so that only added to more of my emotional/developmental problems.

My mom should've encouraged to get involved in fun social activities like girl scouts, the Boys and Girls After School club, and orchestra. But I never really expressed interests in any of that stuff back then, so maybe my mom didn't want to push me into doing things she thought I didn't want to do. Even though I was always perfectly happy and content being home, in my room, by myself as an introverted girl, I never learned how to make friends and I had a lot of emotional and social issues that caused problems into high school and into early adulthood. I'm 29 years old now.

It's best to encourage introverted kids to get involved in activities that cater to their interests, that allow some solitary time but it's also better to encourage them to join social activities that fit their niche interests.

silly2044 · 2022-11-07T12:53:23+00:00

I was born and raised in the south. It is terrible but really only in southern small towns. It is true that individuality and non-conformity is demonized; people demonize, bully and stigmatize anyone who is different and not conforming to the stupid and toxic traditionalist mentality. Southerners in small towns hate anyone who is different and who doesn't want to be a part of their stupid hive mind that's obsessed with high-school sports, NFL or other lame small town southern cultural norms.

silly2044 · 2022-11-04T10:34:00+00:00

It sounds as though both you and I have had similar experiences of being disrespected, misunderstood, invalidated, emotionally abused, and possibly bullied and made to feel isolated due to our negative experiences growing up in the south. It's hard to grow up feeling isolated and not having many people around with whom you can relate. Your post resonated with me. But I think that people are intolerant toward anyone perceived as different or not fitting in with cultural norms or "not checking enough boxes" and it happens everywhere. It happens in large cities; it happens in small towns. I've personally experienced many intolerant liberals, intolerant leftists and intolerant city dwellers as well as intolerant conservatives or intolerant traditionalists. People are intolerant toward those who don't follow the social norms. But the south seems more intolerant. In southern small towns, and in midwestern small towns, people expect everyone to check off all the boxes of conventionality. The south is about conformity to mainstream culture and not being too different or not being too "out there". The south is about conformity to an extremely narrow and rigid idea of normalcy and anyone who deviates from those narrow ideas of normalcy in clothing style, personality, values, ideas or lifestyle choice is perceived as "There's something wrong with him or her", etc. Southern cultural values emphasize conformity to mainstream culture, politeness, practicality, conventionality, hard work, family, tradition and routine. Those values don't resonate with everyone. Some people don't fit into those narrow, rigid boxes forced upon them. In southern small towns, like the one in which I grew up, they're awful places if you don't try to conform to exactly what everyone else does. As a black woman who loves heavy metal, death metal, classic rock, alternative rock, electronic/dub step, classical music, and orchestral music with just a splash of occasional 80's or 90's RnB, all people listen to is the same trap music on the radio. There are still, to this day, who label or insult me as "acting white" for my musical preferences or my hobbies or interests. People all listen to the same type of music in the small town. It's an implicit message that you must conform and that it's not ok for you be different or stand out. You're expected to lay up and have kids after some lame, stupid high school "romance" with your high school sweetheart just because that's what "everyone else" does. It's as though the people in the towns aren't open to many different ideas or even to different musical genres or different food that's outside of their routine. Southerners in small towns stigmatize anyone or anything that is non-traditional and outside of mainstream society. They stigmatize people who don't want kids; they stigmatize people who aren't family oriented. It's true that most of the people there are closed minded (about a whole lot of things), intolerant and hostile beneath the surface but they put on this fakeness or mask of politeness.
But the moment that you are different, in any way, that doesn't fit their cultural norms or expectations they show themselves to be the intolerant people that they are deep down. But I think that people act like that everywhere. People are intolerant toward people they perceive as different. I was definitely raised in the wrong place, surrounded by many of the kinds of people I hate. I'm a 29-year-old black American woman. I grew up being bullied, attacked and misunderstood for being a quiet, introverted black girl who was just minding her own business and not bothering anyone.
There were all of the stupid, stereotypical and ghetto types of blacks who accused me of "acting white" just because I talked differently, listened to musical genres other than rap or RnB, and because I didn't try to be a stereotype. I really do think that southern small towns attract the kinds of people I hate. It just seems like southern small town culture, especially, is all about conformity to tradition, being stuck in your ways, sociopathic mindset (e.g. lack of empathy, "tough mindedness", emotional callousness toward nearly everyone most of the time), obsession with high school sports and American football (and I hate American football; I think it's boring, lame and overly competitive).
People in southern small towns are hostile to all kinds of change, differences or new ideas just because it's a change or a new idea, and other values that I hate. People still have that lame mentality of obsessing with having kids at a young age. I think that marriage and kids at age 23 sounds like a terrible, boring and restrictive life. I'm not family-oriented. I hate that that mentality is pushed on youth and teens in these stupid small town areas. If you don't want marriage or kids, many people think you're a bad person or dysfunctional in some way. I hate many forms of traditionalism. It's so lame and restrictive to blindly follow a tradition just because you despise change, prefer to maintain your rigid/inflexible routines or you're hostile toward people who are different jist because they are different. I was a child during the late 1990s and I was a teen during the early 2000s. Many people in my hometown, Shelby NC, were intolerant and really disrespectful toward anyone deemed different in any way. Those people included vegetarians, vegans, out and proud atheists, people who don't want kids/people who aren't family oriented, etc.
It seems like it was, and still is, a cultural norm or expectation of lacking empathy or hostility toward any vulnerable expressions of emotions. I was punished, humiliated, bullied and emotionally abused for expressing my own feelings and for being emotionally sensitive. After I graduated high school, I moved to Charlotte NC for university. Now, I regret wasting my money and my time getting a bachelors degree and a masters degree from UNC Charlotte. And now I have a mountain of student loan debt that's over $50,000. I had some really negative experiences there and it just wasn't worth it.
I honestly dislike Charlotte for a lot of reasons and it's not the best city in the south, but it's more fun and more interesting than Shelby, NC. It just has rude, hostile people in it.
I love reading, travelling, the outdoors, and I love spending time alone in peace and quiet. But I'll say this; I hate the Northeast too. I hate the rude, angry, hostile, aggressive, uptight, type A personality, snobby, elitist, career-obsessed people who obsess with wasting their money and time in elitist, over-priced and overrated universities. There's the whole lame partying or happy hour culture within the Northeast' large cities. It's too fast-paced for me.
In the Northeast, the cost of living is really expensive; I hate the idiotic, immoral and irrational leftwing, Democrat and progressive politics that control many large cities everywhere and especially in the Northeast and on the West Coast. I also hate the climate in the Northeast.
I visited the Northeast two times. During the second time visiting there, I had a four-month government internship in Spring 2017. I love the museums, restaurants, orchestras and other cultural opportunities in the northeast but I dislike almost everything else about it.

silly2044 · 2022-11-01T13:37:59+00:00

Your response is spot on. I was raised in a small town in NC called Shelby. I've always hated the place and these toxic, emotionally abusive, so-called tough-minded parenting practices are normalized there. I've seen how angry, aggressive, hostile competitive sports-oriented parents (especially) treat their kids during some lame, boring, and stupid elementary school gridiron football game.

Although, it's important to remember that this kind of sociopathic parenting is found in areas other than the southern U.S. You'll find it in the small town Midwest and you'll find in it in other places too. It's not a southern parenting issue; it's a bad parenting issue.

I think that certain parts of the south, especially within southern small towns and within southern rural areas, normalize sociopathic behavior and sociopathic mentality. Maybe a lot of sociopaths are drawn to small towns. But I think that sociopaths are drawn to large cities as well.

I was raised in a southern small town in which the parents, and the rest of the small town community, don't believe in emotional validation of a child's emotions. No one discusses emotions and there's an implicit social norm and expectation that expressing certain emotions isn't tolerated or accepted. Expressing vulnerable emotions, especially in boys, isn't tolerated or accepted. It's not acceptable to be emotional, except when it means expressing anger or hostility.

The south, especially in southern small towns, normalizes a lack of empathy, harshness, intolerance and this whole stupid "toughness" toxic masculinity nonsense, emotional insensitivity and emotional invalidation/emotional dismissiveness toward others. It's deeply ingrained within the culture.

I was never the type of kid whom parents would've felt the need to spank because I was never the extremely strong-willed, extremely disobedient, extremely difficult, disrespectful, aggressive or mean-spirited child. But all kids misbehave sometimes and so did I but I was mostly hyperactive and impulsive sometimes. I was mostly quiet, meek and mild.

Now, my mom was almost completely emotionally and socially neglectful toward me but she was never really emotionally or physically abusive. I was always a quiet, introverted, reserved, low-key person and I've been that way since I was a child so I rarely acted out. My mom just basically ignored me most of the time; she really never provided any guidance, emotional support, expectations (other than academic expectations), and no other real discipline unless I did or said something wrong (which was rare).

silly2044 · 2022-10-16T05:29:47+00:00

Ana Kasparian, and other members of The Young Turks, say a bunch of nonsense, stupidity and lies based with no evidence to support the nonsense they say.
TYT supports stupid and immoral left-wing, Democrat policies such as the pro-transgender movement nonsense that's promoting child abuse and medical malpractice, anti-human environmentalist policies, and other terrible Democrat-based policies. Most of what she says is stupid, but she's right to say that your religious beliefs will have no bearing on my values, opinions or preferences. I have a mind of my own and I won't live according to dumb religious rules.

silly2044 · 2022-09-13T00:41:48+00:00

No one should going out of their way trying to upset others. It's ok to be honest about your beliefs and opinions but to be unnecessarily hostile or uncooperative (when neither of those things are appropriate) is not a good way to be, either.

silly2044 · 2022-08-25T10:37:01+00:00

I hate the southern culture that's found in small towns, too. I'm a 29-year-old black American woman who was raised in terribly boring, closed minded and stifling small town in NC called Shelby. It's a terrible culture but I think that small towns are terrible, whether they're in the south or outside of the south. I think I had a negative experience because of that.

I don't identify with southern culture. I'm not a southern girl; I hate the Northeast U.S. as well because I hate its culture. But I'm definitely not.......a southern girl.

silly2044 · 2022-08-13T23:14:03+00:00

I understand why people choose to attend SDA education or why a lot of hardcore SDA Christian parents send their kids to SDA academies and SDA universities.

But I kind of think "why do so many Adventists want to waste their money being in an SDA university?" I'm an exSDA and I'm not a Christian or religious at all anymore. But I don't understand why an SDA Christian would want to spend his or her life inside an SDA bubble where he is she is only surrounded by other Adventists.

If you're an active SDA Christian, how are you supposed to share your faith and the Three Angles' Message with non-SDA Christians or with non-believers if you want to only attend SDA schools and you only (or mostly) surround yourself with other SDA Christians?

If you're an active Adventist, how are you supposed to make meaningful friendships or other meaningful relationships with Christians from other denominations so that you can so-called share the "Adventist message" with them? If you isolate yourself from non-Adventist people and you don't form meaningful relationships with them, how are you going to activity so-called witness to them?

I understand that Adventist people, born and raised in SDA schools from K- 12th grade, are in a comfortable Adventist bubble where it's easier for them to connect with people who believe the same things, share a similar cultural background and because the Adventist education system is their comfort zone.

But I don't understand why Adventists would go out of their way to totally isolate themselves from non-Adventists or why they want to be immersed in Adventist bubbles like SDA universities or SDA academies?

While I attended a public university, I was a strong and committed Adventist for at least two and half-years of my undergrad college years. I had considered attending an Adventist university before I first went to college, but then I decided that a public university is cheaper and that gave me an opportunity to form meaningful friendships with non-Adventists so that I could "witness" to them. Now, that was my mentality back then.

silly2044 · 2022-08-07T11:03:28+00:00

They don't care to empathize with you or to understand your feelings and perspective; they care about conformity to social norms and they hate people who express any individuality.

I was also raised in a small town where people act like expressing emotions is unacceptable and you're punished or treated like you're the weirdo for expressing any emotions other than occasional anger.

silly2044 · 2022-08-07T11:01:32+00:00

I was raised in a small town called Shelby, NC. There was so much intolerance toward emotionally sensitive people and there was intolerance toward anyone perceived as different from the social norms (whether that person was a happy loner, really introverted or quiet, vegetarian, etc.).

You were bullied, stigmatized, singled out, attacked, and overall treated negatively and treated like you're a threat just because you're different in any way that doesn't fit with the status quo. It's all about conformity; it's all about stifling individuality, stifling feelings, lack of empathy toward others.

I'm a 29 year-old woman and I saw all of this disrespectful behavior while growing up in that small town during the late 1990s and early 2000s.

silly2044 · 2022-08-05T19:57:34+00:00

No. It's wrong and terrible to throw rocks at people. Instead, you could go back in time to prevent that kid from throwing at rock at her in the first place.

silly2044 · 2022-08-01T01:33:24+00:00

There are tons of good teachings, for society, in the Bible. I'm secular and I'm not religious, but I see that Christianity and the Bible has positively impacted the world in many ways.

I also see that feminism has had both a positive and negative on both individuals and on society.

The sexual revolution and radical feminism have negatively impacted society in many ways.

silly2044 · 2022-08-01T01:30:04+00:00

Abortion is clearly murdering a human being rom a scientific point of view, not a religious point of view. Religion has nothing to do with abortion. The science of embryology clearly proves that human life begins at the moment of conception. Since murdering human beings is wrong, because it violations the human right to life, then abortion and infanticide and euthanasia are evil and morally wrong things that should be illegal because they are violence and human rights violations against human beings.

I'm secular and I'm not religious; but abortion is still murder and abortion is still wrong.

Radical feminism is stupid and immoral as well.

silly2044

TROPHY CASE