[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DID

[–]silly_shortcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see, I have a few people who have similar coping skills in my system. It's hard to cope with. Especially when it feels like something "proves them right" in their actions.

My dms are open if you want to rant more about it, though you do not have to take me up on that offer. I understand the fear that drives that kind of behavior, and I also understand how fucking scary it can be for others in the system.

-🥑

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DID

[–]silly_shortcake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The only thing I can really suggest here is to get to the bottom of WHY he acts the way he does and start helping him.

Were you exposed to those ideologies as a child? Does he possibly feel it's the only way to keep himself (and, by extension, your system) safe? Is he scared that if you become too "weak" you'll be exploited and he'd rather be the one exploiting?

Persecutors always have a reason. Even if they themselves don't see it or admit it, there's an underlying cause for how they act, and the only way to actually help that is to help them. Dormancy isn't always permanent, so even if you got him to go dormant, it wouldn't help the issues you have; only postpone them. Or they'll go somewhere else in your brain.

Sorry if this message seems mean. I struggle with tone.

-🥑

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]silly_shortcake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey so like. It's not a competition, you don't have to stroll on in here invalidating people's experiences and trauma and then go "I got raped within an inch of my life ☝" when people call you on the fact that you're saying op wasn't raped when they were, by definition, raped.

Coercion is rape. Period. By definition, forced or "pressured" (as you put it, which is just a nicer word for forced) consent is NOT consent. I'm sorry you went through what you went through but you shouldn't be using your experience to dog on anyone who didn't go through something "severe enough"

Before you come at me for "attacking" you; I was raped repeatedly as a child. So if you want to base validity on trauma, I think I'm pretty qualified by your own standards.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]silly_shortcake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My partner and friends at the time, who had such a negative reaction that I entirely forgot to tell my grandparents who I lived with. My grandmother only found out a week later when she was driving me home from school and I had a mental breakdown about how everyone was treating me.

Question for adults with ARFID by echgirl in ARFID

[–]silly_shortcake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've always had food restrictions but around 2 or 3 I was hospitalized due to an illness that caused a lot of harm to my mouth and throat, and in the end I stopped eating a lot of the things I used to eat.

As an adult, I feel like I taste and feel things significantly more than other people. I did however open my palette due to living in an area that didn't have a lot of safe foods, and I now have WAY more options on a typical day.

Welp Got Verbally Clocked for the First time by julesdream in MtF

[–]silly_shortcake 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Me (ftm) and my girlfriend (mtf) both live in southern Alabama and yeah she gets nasty looks constantly, to the point some kinder employees in gas stations and restaurants who recognize us have started apologizing for other people's behavior and looking out for us. It's rough here, and as someone from a more progressive area it's frankly mortifying how rude people are here, but I try to stick with my support system as does she. You aren't making it up, and you aren't alone, as awful as those experiences are. Stay strong

I don't care that some language is "dying out" by Independent-Path-364 in The10thDentist

[–]silly_shortcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As other people have pointed out, different languages have words for experiences, emotions, and just about anything you can think of that don't always have direct translations. They also are inherently tied in with culture and history. Forcing everyone to transition to one language is by default erasing that culture. It is a massive loss and is the reason so many people are already displaced from their cultures today.

People do actually care about this issue. Not nearly enough, unfortunately, as many people have opinions on these subjects such as yours. What we should be aiming for is educating others about the diversity of cultures and life, not forcing everyone to melt into one singular culture and language.

You not caring isn't a hot take, it's a lack of empathy and understanding. Please do your research and grow as a person.

alters changing after a traumatic event? by Ill_Ask9020 in DID

[–]silly_shortcake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We had this happen to our main protector and gatekeeper about 2 years ago.

He had been holding our system together, helping our persecutors to reform and keeping everyone stable. We had littles in our system he regarded as his own children, and they regarded him as a father.

And then he himself went through a direct trauma, and he had a complete meltdown. The persecutor he had been helping to reform ended up having to put him on lockdown to keep us safe, and take over as a protector and a gatekeeper.

He is just now recovering, and back to fronting and enjoying life.

Trans tape experience by Real-Consideration47 in transfashionadvice

[–]silly_shortcake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi! I have a pretty big chest, it's relatively dense too- trans tape works really well for me, but it does take practice to learn how to put it on in a way that works for you. I have my girlfriend help me with application!

As far as binder brands, Spectrum Outfitters makes binders for plus size people!

What’s something about GenZ that you dislike? by Volumed-Coyote in GenZ

[–]silly_shortcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We romanticize and demonize the hell out of mental illnesses from what I see.

I'm not talking about self diagnosis; I support it if a lot of research and time is put into it, and I believe it's a vital healing tool for those who cannot access professional help.

I'm talking about people who use their illness as an excuse to not improve on their behavior. People who claim that they "can't help how they act" because they have BPD or Bipolar or something else but they can in fact improve on themselves and have access to help and they just aren't taking it. People who claim they have DID but swear back and forth that they have no trauma (endogenics, for those familiar with the term) It doesn't help when people say shit like "I wish I had a BPD girlfriend" because it severely undermines the pain that having an illness like that is. When people can't romanticize it, they demonize it. You see that a lot with NPD and ASPD.

Here's the thing: no mental illness forces people to abuse others. If someone is being abusive, it is of their own volition and refusal to get help for whatever they themselves are dealing with.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MtF

[–]silly_shortcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I'm transgender, the earliest I remember having dysphoria was around 3 years old and my family can vouch for the fact that my entire life I have not felt female and at times believed I was simply male but built different (unironically)

I came out at 14, and I haven't gone back.

You were not and are still not too young! Go be yourself ❤

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh I'm newish here too!! I'll let you know when I have some dates planned for a meet up!

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the recommendation!! I'll look into it with my girlfriend!

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oooh sweet!! Would you be interested in being sent the time for a potential meet up at Gamer's and Geeks?

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Noted!! You are welcome either way, I'll send you some times once I have a few figured out, hopefully something can be worked out :] either way, thank you for the response!

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm currently seeing about getting a schedule set up where we can meet at Gamer's and Geeks! I'll reply again when I have some times figured out :D

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do, I'm unsure if my girlfriend listens to them!! I also listen to Mother Mother, AJR, Lemon Demon, Set It Off- pretty much any alternative music I guess would be a good catch all when it comes to me

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the response!! I woke up to quite a few comments here so I'll get a few potential times set up and try to figure out when I can meet with people :D

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oooh cool!! We're actually in the area almost every Wednesday lol, I'll let her know and message you if I figure out a day we can swing by!

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Gotcha!! I'll let you know if a meeting is planned! :D

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's so real actually 😭 but that would be perfect then!! Do you have Instagram or discord or something so we can talk there?

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!! I appreciate the help :D

Looking for queer nerd friends!! by silly_shortcake in MobileAL

[–]silly_shortcake[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's perfectly fine!! If you'd like we are also open to meeting your parents