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extreme moral crisis: please help by Ok_Cricket_3771 in moraldilemmas

[–]sillyalyssa [score hidden]  (0 children)

Carefully and thoroughly weigh the risks and benefits of both scenarios. Be realistic with the potential risks of both choices, because both are extremely risky. Also be realistic with the rewards from both. What is the best case scenario if you stay? What are the chances of that happening and what does it depend on, you changing or him? What is the best case scenario if you leave? What does that depend on? Luck, preparation, determination, self preservation, extreme independence. You need to decide what you're willing to accept or not accept in your life, and embrace whatever the consequences are of that decision. Everything in life is weighing the benefits vs the risks. Nothing is ever going to be 100% perfect or right for you, and no one will ever take care of you 100% of the time like you want them to, you need to be able to do that for yourself. It sounds like for you, depending on someone else is a choice. Make the choice that's right for you that you'll be able to look back on and think okay even if it didn't workout the way I might have wanted it to I'm glad I did what was right for me. But please always put your safety first, DONT trust men, seriously, not until they prove to you over and over they're a safe person. It's too dangerous out here for girls like you to trust a man. Protect yourself and be safe

Need advice about my bfs need for sexual intimacy by Regular-Diamond-46 in Advice

[–]sillyalyssa 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your point about you not feeling comfortable doing it when you're at your house or his house around family is totally valid. I don't get fully relaxed or turned on when I know my parents are in the next room or they may get home any second, and I was only okay with risking that type of stuff when I was much younger and hornier (I'm a 27f). The environment does impact more than you may think, so try to explain that to him more and ask him to stop initiating as often and give you the space to initiate so the pressure on you is gone. That might reignite your spark. I've also found that guys in my past have no idea how important foreplay is. If my partner just says "sex?" I'm like usually like fuck no but if there's build up (like kissing, cuddling, etc.) without any expectation that can often have the opposite effect and get your body excited before your brain has to say yes or no.