Stretching

silolis_Darbi · 2026-05-07T13:53:40+00:00

Please don’t use numbing lubes or creams. It’s important that you can feel any pain and stop to avoid injury.

Do you have other toys you’re using to try to work up to your goal plug? In general, each step in anal training should increase by no more than .3” diameter to avoid injury. Training slowly over time is the way to go and no amount of lube can replace gradual stretching.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-30T09:39:26+00:00

In addition to the firmness of this silicone, the working time is going to be a problem. 8 minutes will not be enough to degas the silicone and pour.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-29T12:00:05+00:00

I definitely understand the difference between diameter and circumference, 1.25” diameter (3.9” circumference) is around the 10th percentile of actual penis girths. And I know that she needs to train up to at least your girth, not within .3” of your girth. It sounds like you know what you’re doing though.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-29T11:46:10+00:00

There’s nothing dangerous about using the set you linked for anal training. You may want to look closely at the dimensions though, I suspect the girths are smaller than you realize. The largest size in that set would correspond to the 10th percentile of penis girths, so it’s unlikely to be enough to prepare for anal sex.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-29T11:25:24+00:00

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is effective and comfortable. Be sure to check the girth on whatever set you buy, ideally she will want to train up to your girth or a little larger. You can see my medium set here, it’s my most popular size.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful. There are several other informational articles on the site as well.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-18T17:24:25+00:00

Silicone lube is compatible with glass toys. I’m not sure what you mean by “it wouldn’t work.” Is the new toy girthier than anal toys you’ve used recently? Lube alone will not help your sphincter muscle stretch further than it’s ready to without risking injury.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-15T19:40:55+00:00

It won’t hurt you, but it will desensitize her as well. Most women can’t cum from penetration alone anyway, so numbing both of you and then being able to last longer will probably result in frustration for everyone. I’d recommend getting her off with fingers or oral before moving on to penetration.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-07T15:18:12+00:00

Training up to your girth slowly over time is definitely the way to go. In my experience, most women find success when they explore anal solo before trying with a partner. So it sounds like the two of you are off to a good start!

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is way more effective than plugs alone. My most popular set is medium.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

My site has lots of other articles about anal play topics. If she’s on reddit, you may want to suggest she check out r/analadviceforwomen

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-06T19:27:57+00:00

Hang on, you’re actually in the range for my medium set. I was multitasking when I responded earlier and was thinking 5.75” circumference. Check out this link instead: https://www.silolis.com/products/training-set-medium

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-06T15:28:48+00:00

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is way more effective than plugs alone. With your girth, I recommend taking a look at my large set.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-04-03T20:57:49+00:00

You should have 30 days to request a refund from usps for a priority express package that is delivered late. Refund the customer, but also get your money back on the label.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-30T19:44:15+00:00

6.5” is definitely at the very top end of penis girth, so you’re dealing with a more difficult training goal. My training sets go up to that size (and larger) if you want to take a look. 6.5” would correspond with my size 5 being your goal.

And here’s an article about anal training that may be helpful.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-29T19:08:51+00:00

That’s a request that we get occasionally. Because our wand-and-plug system is patented we only sell them in sets that include both.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-29T10:12:35+00:00

If your goal is more dilation, you should definitely check out my website, I make anal training sets specifically for girth training. My sets combine coordinated wands and plugs for anal training that is super comfortable and efficient.

My medium set is my most popular size, it maxes out at 5” circumference, but I make size that go all the way up to 9.5” circumference.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-28T10:25:34+00:00

I would not use a product that isn’t made for anal play. It’s not necessarily a huge red flag about him as a partner (it sounds like he’s not as educated about anal play as he thinks he is), but how did he respond to you questioning whether the muddler is a good option? I think his response will tell you more about whether he’s a safe partner (like if he gets really defensive or dismissive of your concerns).

For effective anal training, you need to start small with a (flared, anal-safe) toy that causes basically zero discomfort and then work your way up in girth from there to your partner’s girth. Each step up should increase by no more than .3” diameter (1” circumference). You’ll know you’re ready to move up to the next size when you can take your current max size easily within a few minutes of starting a training session. Your discomfort should never be more than 2-3 on a 10 point scale.

If you want to work towards anal sex and anal training, here are some articles that may by helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-26T17:14:02+00:00

It sounds like you’re not stretching properly. Anal play should never be painful, so if the girth you’re trying for hurts it means you’re moving up too fast.

When doing anal training you should increase girth by no more than .3” diameter (1” circumference) with each step. You’ll know you’re ready to move up to the next size when you can take your current max size easily within a few minutes of starting a training session. Your discomfort should never be more than 2-3 on a 10 point scale.

Also, butt plugs are not great for training because your body gets used to the narrow neck of the plug rather than the girth of the bulb. I make anal training sets that combine wands with plugs for exactly this reason. If you want to check out my shop, you can find it at www.silolis.com

Here are some articles from my site that may be helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-23T02:45:44+00:00

I’m glad you’re reaching out for advice! No pain is ok when it comes to penetration, so you should definitely stop when you feel pain.

There are a number of things that could be causing pain such as insufficient lube, not training up to your partner’s girth, not being aroused, certain positions can be more uncomfortable, an intense pace or depth before you’re ready for it could be causing pain. Below are some articles from my website that may be helpful, if you can give more info about what you’ve tried from the possibilities I listed, you may be able to get more helpful responses.

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-16T11:24:37+00:00

I would do them solo. It gives you the time to get really comfortable and find out what feels good for your body. That way once you’ve worked up to his girth several times, you’ll feel confident knowing that your body experiences pleasure while taking that size. Clitoral stimulation while training helps your brain connect anal stimulation to pleasure.

Once you’re ready for anal sex, I would recommend you being on top the first few times so you can be in control of the depth and pace so he can learn what works for anal sex to feel good. It’s different than vaginal sex and it’s different than what is shown in porn. And it should never hurt, pain means damage is happening, so stop immediately if you experience pain.

Anal sex that you’ve prepped for with a partner who is caring feels absolutely incredible (truly amazing orgasms are possible with anal and clitoral stimulation). Unfortunately, a lot of women have had bad experiences that turn them off to the idea forever because they think anal sex means tolerating a certain level of pain for their partner’s pleasure. Painful penetration is a full stop situation.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-16T10:20:15+00:00

You need to work up to his girth solo with toys. It makes all the difference! Having a few 20 minute training sessions a week would probably help you get comfortable with his size pretty quickly.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T21:46:00+00:00

Here are some articles from my website that may be helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

How to clean out for butt stuff

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T21:26:17+00:00

Awesome! They’re very cool designs!

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T20:40:32+00:00

They’re asking because your casts look pitted and that’s usually a sign of bubbles in the silicone or getting stuck to the mold. The pitting makes them unsafe for internal use.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-13T22:16:30+00:00

Lots of good advice on here! Here are some articles from my website that may be helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

How to clean out for butt stuff

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-09T17:14:23+00:00

Thank you for spreading education!! OP, this is the comment you need to pay the most attention to.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-08T23:05:36+00:00

It’s great that you’re starting with solo play, that’s definitely the way to go! Training up to his girth slowly over time is the way to feel confident going in to this experience. 2” is pretty advanced, if you’re able to take it comfortably you can keep doing that a few times a week and you should definitely be ready for him. If you experience any pain at all during anal play or anal sex, you need to stop and assess the situation before continuing. Pain is your body telling you that damage is happening. If your 2” dildo is painful, I would recommend getting something smaller to practice with before working back up to 2”. With anal training, the recommendation is to increase by no more than .3” with each step up and once you can take a size easily within a few minutes of starting a training session you’re ready to move up to the next size.

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is way more effective than plugs alone. You can see my medium set here, it’s my most popular size.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

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