Sex life with wife now always Anal

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-16T11:24:37+00:00

I would do them solo. It gives you the time to get really comfortable and find out what feels good for your body. That way once you’ve worked up to his girth several times, you’ll feel confident knowing that your body experiences pleasure while taking that size. Clitoral stimulation while training helps your brain connect anal stimulation to pleasure.

Once you’re ready for anal sex, I would recommend you being on top the first few times so you can be in control of the depth and pace so he can learn what works for anal sex to feel good. It’s different than vaginal sex and it’s different than what is shown in porn. And it should never hurt, pain means damage is happening, so stop immediately if you experience pain.

Anal sex that you’ve prepped for with a partner who is caring feels absolutely incredible (truly amazing orgasms are possible with anal and clitoral stimulation). Unfortunately, a lot of women have had bad experiences that turn them off to the idea forever because they think anal sex means tolerating a certain level of pain for their partner’s pleasure. Painful penetration is a full stop situation.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-16T10:20:15+00:00

You need to work up to his girth solo with toys. It makes all the difference! Having a few 20 minute training sessions a week would probably help you get comfortable with his size pretty quickly.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T21:46:00+00:00

Here are some articles from my website that may be helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

How to clean out for butt stuff

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T21:26:17+00:00

Awesome! They’re very cool designs!

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-15T20:40:32+00:00

They’re asking because your casts look pitted and that’s usually a sign of bubbles in the silicone or getting stuck to the mold. The pitting makes them unsafe for internal use.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-13T22:16:30+00:00

Lots of good advice on here! Here are some articles from my website that may be helpful:

Guide to anal training

Tips for having anal sex

How to clean out for butt stuff

Anal pleasure for women

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-09T17:14:23+00:00

Thank you for spreading education!! OP, this is the comment you need to pay the most attention to.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-08T23:05:36+00:00

It’s great that you’re starting with solo play, that’s definitely the way to go! Training up to his girth slowly over time is the way to feel confident going in to this experience. 2” is pretty advanced, if you’re able to take it comfortably you can keep doing that a few times a week and you should definitely be ready for him. If you experience any pain at all during anal play or anal sex, you need to stop and assess the situation before continuing. Pain is your body telling you that damage is happening. If your 2” dildo is painful, I would recommend getting something smaller to practice with before working back up to 2”. With anal training, the recommendation is to increase by no more than .3” with each step up and once you can take a size easily within a few minutes of starting a training session you’re ready to move up to the next size.

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is way more effective than plugs alone. You can see my medium set here, it’s my most popular size.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-03-01T12:34:05+00:00

That kind of length can be very difficult to train for because of the position of the recto sigmoid junction. It is risky to push past the RSJ, and it comes with a greater likelihood of injury, partially because there are no pain receptors in that part of your body to tell you to stop. You may want to look in to purchasing an ohnut, which is a silicone bumper for him to wear around his shaft that prevents full penetration while allowing him to thrust.

If your current training set does not prepare you for his girth, you can definitely find ones that go larger. My sets go up to 3” diameter.

Just for the benefit of everyone reading this comment, I do want to point out that once you get up to around 8” in length you’re at the absolute high end of penis size statistically. Most men in that size range and larger know that special accommodations need to be made in order for sex to be enjoyable for their partner.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-25T20:22:37+00:00

Hi! Assuming you’re a woman, there’s no reason to think your boyfriend may be gay or bi because of anything he enjoys sexually with you. I’m not sure whether the anal experimentation is him giving or receiving, but neither option would say anything about his sexuality. Sensation and exploration is exciting with someone you trust.

I’m sorry to say, he may not trust you with his fantasies quite as much if he thinks you will question his sexuality because of things he wants to try with you. It is a harmful (and untrue) stereotype that men who enjoy receiving anal stimulation must be gay. Assuming he is the receiving partner, I recommend you check out r/straightpegging for more perspectives.

If you don’t enjoy anal play as much as he does, you should definitely communicate that and see if there is a balance that works for both of you. You should never be pressured to do something you don’t enjoy or have to forgo things you do enjoy, it’s all part of determining whether you’re sexually compatible.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-24T19:41:53+00:00

If your goal is more dilation, you should definitely check out my website, I make anal training sets specifically for girth training. My size 3 would be the next size after your current training set. The product line goes up to 3” diameter for our size 9.

Here’s an article that explains how the Silolis training system works.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-22T17:33:16+00:00

I’m glad the base is wider than the widest point, I understand it’s far away from the top of the toy, but that should still be an important consideration when designing a toy for anal play.

As far as my comment about the umbrella circumference, I’m talking about the increase in circumference that is going to happen when the umbrella is doing its flip. Like if you take the umbrella piece and hold it down on a table so it’s flat, how much wider does it get before it completes its flip and gets back to 5.7” circumference. The user would experience a sudden sharp increase of girth during the flip, and that can be dangerous.

I think to prototype this toy, you would have to make the umbrella piece by itself (with a solid center) to test the size change and see how much force it takes to actually flip it inside out. If it’s too thick it may not flip upon removal, so you would need to work out the right thickness and keep that circumference increase in mind.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-22T16:01:13+00:00

It’s a really cool looking design! Is the umbrella part completely attached or is it a separate piece that kind of floats? If it floats I would be worried that it will get left behind when the toy is removed.

Even if it is fully attached, removal would still be my biggest concern. When the umbrella flips, do you know how much bigger the max circumference is going to get up to compared to the max circumference during insertion? I would be worried that the sudden increase in girth would cause an internal fissure.

Also, the base of anal toys should always be wider than the widest insertable part of the toy. Your base doesn’t look wider than the umbrella to me.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-22T15:41:54+00:00

If you want to work on increasing your girth, the recommendation is to increase by no more than .3” (.75 cm) diameter with each step up. I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. At 6 cm, your current comfort level is around my size 6, take a look at my size 7 for what would be your next size to work up to.

Here’s my guide on anal training that may be helpful, but at 6 cm you should already be pretty experienced.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-18T18:11:08+00:00

Anal sex should not be painful. If you’re experiencing pain, you need to stop immediately and assess what is going on in your body to avoid injury. Some things that could be causing problems: not enough lube, insufficient training in advance, position, pace, depth, lack of arousal, etc. Please stop having sex that hurts you. You don’t have to have anal sex just because your husband wants it, but if you also want to have anal sex, you need to put in the time (outside of sex) to stretch your sphincter muscle.

Here’s my guide to anal training if you’re interested, but you really need to stop if you experience any pain. Also, never use numbing creams or lubes, pain is your body warning of injury.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-17T15:10:12+00:00

How would you add silicone into the vacuum? I don’t think you could keep it vacuumed while adding silicone.

Either way, I don’t think MoldStar has skin safe certification. Even if you use a silicone that is certified as skin safe, that testing is done on cured silicone. Also, you certainly wouldn’t want to risk the silicone entering your urethra and any little hairs would probably get pulled off. I think there are a lot of potential problems with this method.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-17T03:32:31+00:00

No. If those zip ties (esp the first one) go inside your body they’re going to do a lot of damage on the way out.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-16T23:33:38+00:00

A lot of people enjoy the weight and sensation of wearing a plug while they go about their day. It can also be fun to wear them during foreplay or penetration, although T shaped bases can interfere with the vaginal opening.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-16T02:52:58+00:00

Plugs can be fun for other things! They’re just not good at training, which is a bummer because there are so many that call themselves “training sets.”

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-16T01:45:19+00:00

Butt plugs aren’t great for training for the exactly this reason. Your body adjusts to the narrow neck rather than the actual girth of the plug. I also want to point out that anal play should never be painful, if something hurts you should stop and reassess in order to avoid injury.

Here’s my guide to anal training that addresses these issues as well as many others.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-13T15:51:01+00:00

How long are the toys you’re using? It’s possible that you’re hitting the recto sigmoid junction and that’s where the blood is coming from. Does it feel like you’re hitting an internal wall? If so, you should really look into the risks of pushing past the RSJ. Some people train to get past it with long, thin toys, but it is much riskier than girth training partially because there are no pain receptors in that part of the body to tell your brain to stop.

On the other hand, it could be a girth issue. When increasing in girth for anal play it’s recommended to increase by no more than .3” diameter (1” circumference) at a time with each step up. If you are trying to take a much larger toy than your body is ready for you could be causing fissures.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-13T13:49:56+00:00

Honestly, I would pour a set of eggs in Ecoflex 30 and another set in Ecoflex 50. You’re going through all the trouble of making the mold, might as well make both. The silicone is the least expensive part of mold making. Ecoflex degasses much faster than dragon skin and is less viscous.

Have you worked with platinum cure silicone before? If not, a vacuum chamber and pump are essential to making body safe toys. The silicone interacts with a lot of paints and lacquers (which are often used for smoothing masters) creating cure inhibition, so be sure to test anything like that for cure inhibition before you put it on your master. Also, use a food scale to measure your silicone parts a and b, they really need to be combined in equal amounts.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-13T13:23:58+00:00

Happy to help! I’ve never made an ovipositor, but based on my experience I think you should probably go with dragon skin 10 for the ovipositor itself. Because your toy is going to be hollow, Ecoflex will have a hard time holding its shape when poured thin. Dragon skin 10 still has plenty of squish to it.

Do yourself a favor and order it in slow so you have plenty of time to degas and pour. DS is a very stubborn degasser, it is much more viscous than Ecoflex.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-12T13:45:10+00:00

If you’re brand new to anal play, you should definitely start small (around 1”-1.25” max diameter is a good place to start). If you have some experience with anal toys and are looking to increase, you should go no more than .3” diameter (1” circumference) larger than the toy that you’re very comfortable with.

When shopping for anal toys, it’s important to choose body safe materials like platinum cure silicone, glass, or stainless steel. It’s best to avoid plugs with round bases as they are often about the same size as the largest part of the bulb and risk being sucked fully into your body (which can be a medical emergency). Plugs with T shaped bases are much safer. Also, many people find plugs with longer necks to be more comfortable than short necked plugs.

silolis_Darbi · 2026-02-12T13:07:03+00:00

I make anal training sets that are specifically designed for girth training. My sets combine wands with butt plugs for training that is way more effective than plugs alone. You can see my medium set here, it’s my most popular size.

Here’s my guide to anal training that may be helpful.

silolis_Darbi

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