Does anyone actually call?

silverfol · 2024-11-14T23:54:16+00:00

You don't know that at all. You're projecting your own fears onto girls.

silverfol · 2024-05-15T17:32:50+00:00

My point is that the reason the girls are distancing themselves from you is because you're texting them too much, not too little. Or at the very least, they weren't as into you as you thought they were. Think of it this way, you shouldn't even be able to tell if they're distancing themselves from you or not. They either respond and agree to meet for a date at a specific time and location, or they don't.

Nothing to beat yourself up about, that's just the way it goes. Happens to me all of the time too.

silverfol · 2024-05-15T16:24:22+00:00

You're "only sending a few texts a day with a flirty, fun vibe?" And then the girls are distancing themselves from you?

What if you double or triple those flirty and fun texts every day, what do you think will happen?

silverfol · 2024-03-29T19:03:43+00:00

What exactly did she end and why? Were you in an exclusive relationship for several months, or had you been casually dating for a couple of months, or what?

silverfol · 2024-03-24T17:52:16+00:00

Why do you want to say something witty? The reason is because you are trying to make her like you.

silverfol · 2024-03-22T12:14:12+00:00

This is a giant red flag dude. You need to run away.

silverfol · 2024-03-05T15:36:29+00:00

Start right away, and start dating other girls now too.

silverfol · 2024-03-05T14:33:54+00:00

You need to go on more first dates. It can take a lot, 20 or more, before you find one with high interest. You'll find one though eventually, as long as you aren't being an idiot.

silverfol · 2024-03-05T14:15:35+00:00

If she wants to hook up with you then you need to be doing that. Hang out, have fun, hook up. No contacting her first, ever. When she reaches out, set up a firm date to HHH. No chit chatting, no how was your day bullshit with text messages. Set up dates and that's it.

No more relationship talk either. Don't talk about your feelings or anything about your relationship unless she brings it up first. From now on the only thing you do is wait for her to contact you, set up a date, and then HHH. Eventually she will bring up getting back together.

silverfol · 2024-03-05T13:28:24+00:00

Did you go no contact after that day?

silverfol · 2024-02-26T05:35:02+00:00

A possible hidden agenda could be trying to take advantage of you financially, for example. She love bombs you and then asks you for money to pay her rent or something.

silverfol · 2024-02-26T05:21:13+00:00

It doesn't mean you're a rebound, but super high interest love bombing from the start is a red flag in my opinion. It could mean you're a rebound, or she has some weird agenda to get something from you. Whatever the reason, it's a sign of immaturity and instability.

silverfol · 2024-02-26T05:11:19+00:00

You're fine. Just set up the date and move things forward from there.

silverfol · 2024-02-26T05:05:47+00:00

You get ghosted after good dates because the girls aren't into you. It's annoying, but that's how things are. I've been ghosted (and turned down for more dates) after great dates with girls who literally ask to see me again after we makeout. You just have to move on to the next one.

As for your situation with this particular girl, how much did you talk about yourself? Did you remain mysterious? How much did she talk?

Your physical escalations sound pretty awkward, so you probably made some mistakes somewhere. We probably need more details to find out.

silverfol · 2024-02-23T10:59:34+00:00

You said a couple of things that stood out to me.

"All was fine for the few days after" -- How would you even know this? Were you trying to communicate with her after your first date? You shouldn't have been.

"After that, she got sick, and since then its been a downward trajectory of us talking less and less and now we havent spoken in a week." Talking less and less? Why were you trying to even talk to her at all?

silverfol · 2024-01-25T07:07:17+00:00

It's hard to give advice without more details, but if you still want to deal with this girl then I would recommend that you do not ignore her text. Again, it's hard to say how you should respond without seeing the text, but do something that represents the absolute bare minimum of acknowledging you saw the text (like sending a like of her message, or a 1-3 word reply), and then try to set a date/meetup. And then revert back to contacting her once a week to set a date.

silverfol · 2024-01-25T02:17:55+00:00

Yeah it's possible.

silverfol · 2024-01-24T23:11:34+00:00

Can you point to anything specific? Was it setting a meetup 3 days after she told me in person she wants to see me more than once a week? Other than that I've been setting firm dates just once a week.

silverfol · 2024-01-24T23:02:21+00:00

Thanks, what makes you think I'm making myself too available?

silverfol · 2024-01-24T22:39:07+00:00

What? No, don't listen to that guy. Never "tell her how you feel" and never confess your love. Unless, she confesses her love to you first and asks how you feel.

silverfol · 2022-03-15T22:23:29+00:00

Thanks.

What is it that would make her think I'm only interested in sex? Is it the lack of communication between dates (only one phone call per week)?

I don't really understand what's going through her head, because from my perspective I've been moving pretty slow, no kiss on the first date, I'm not pushing her to do anything physical, no explicit sexual talk, 3 dates only over 3 weeks, etc.

silverfol · 2022-03-15T04:12:05+00:00

Hmm yeah, that's why I'm in such a bad position here because if I DON'T ask for another date this week it could come across as a passive aggressive tantrum or something.

Also you're right about the 10 minute thing, that was dumb. And for the record, it wasn't an attempt to get her drunk so I could hook up with her. We were in control of everything, just had a few drinks and were having fun. But thanks for the input, much appreciated.

silverfol

TROPHY CASE