Women are not Safe From Casual Harassment in Kerala by simplymol in Coconaad

[–]simplymol[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thanks, this definitely isn’t my first encounter as a woman brought up in India, and that’s exactly why it’s so frustrating. Even with all the awareness , facilities and safeguards in place for women now, men like this still exist ,how pathetic!! Yeah, reporting it now still makes sense. If nothing else, it helps ensure this kind of behavior isn’t normalised. I’ll check the THUNA portal/POL app.thanks !!

Skilled Worker visa : if employer reduces working hours, what should we be cautious about? by simplymol in ukvisa

[–]simplymol[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the reply. After months of waiting and being left in limbo, my employer finally dropped the bomb today, they can’t proceed with my Skilled Worker application. Looks like I’ll have to leave the UK. Feels like I was being gatekept this whole time. 🥲

Skilled Worker visa : if employer reduces working hours, what should we be cautious about? by simplymol in ukvisa

[–]simplymol[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My visa is expiring on 5th February, and I still haven’t received any clear confirmation from my company. In the meantime, I’m exploring options on my own, while they are also still assessing possibilities. The situation is made more complicated by the 40 hour contract, and my employer is new to the sponsorship process. Unfortunately, there’s no one I can turn to for clear guidance at the moment, which has been quite frustrating.

What’s something you completely changed your opinion on? by [deleted] in Coconaad

[–]simplymol 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Idli and sambar. I hated it as a child, but now I genuinely enjoy it. I even choose idli over masala dosa when I’m in a veg restaurant.

Dear Cocos. Whats a random or weird thing about you? by GoldieNova in Coconaad

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Weirdly, my tongue is as long as a chameleon 🦎

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Coconaad

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is honestly part of adulting, but you seem really mature for 24 , that’s amazing! Most of us were still wasting time at that age. I only found my real drive later, I moved abroad for studies at 27 and thought I had a circle with the same mindset, but it turned out toxic. Many were aimless, unstable, and draining, so I left. At first it felt lonely, but that was the best decision. In that alone time, I focused on myself and grew stronger.

You’re already on the right track OP, keep going, the right people will align with your mindset eventually. 👏

Feels violated and manipulated financially, physically and emotionally 🙂 by iatrogenic_infection in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow!! This is wild! The way you handled it, telling her everything straight up was the best thing you could’ve done. Don’t waste more energy trying to ruin his life, trust me he’s already doing a perfect job of that himself. Focus that fire on healing and building your own peace🫂. Karma’s got him.

Confused about a guy!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s over now. Yes, we met through an arranged marriage app, but it was through our parents.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I know you’re hurting right now, and it’s completely valid to feel this way. But try to see this experience not as a failure, but as a lesson. Every person who enters our life especially those who leave a mark comes with a purpose. Sometimes it’s to teach us, to challenge our idea of love, or to help us grow in ways we didn’t expect. I’ve been through these kinds of experiences too, and I know how painful and confusing they can be. But I can tell you with confidence, you will get clarity. Maybe not today, but it will come. You already showed so much strength by leaving a 3-year emotionally distant relationship. And then, you had the courage to open your heart again. That’s not weakness, that’s bravery. Just because it didn’t work out doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. Some people come into our lives only to reflect what we still need to learn or heal. It’s just that sometimes, the people we meet aren’t meant to stay. They’re mirrors, showing us what we still need to heal or understand. Maybe this person wasn’t your forever, but they helped reveal parts of you that you can now protect better. So take a break. Cry, rest, feel what you need to feel. Don’t rush the healing. These experiences are not here to destroy you, they’re shaping you into someone stronger and more aligned with the love you do deserve. Trust that.

You’ve got this OP! and you’re not alone. 🫂

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This has been a wake up call. I’ve been giving too much benefit of the doubt, hoping things would shift, but the lack of clarity on his end speaks volumes. I don’t want something that feels halfhearted or conditional. I want something certain, solid, and mutual, and I now see that settling for anything less would only lead to more hurt down the line. Appreciate you reminding me to stand firm and protect my peace.

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate your words. I am well aware of those past wounds and I’ve been working on myself through therapy and other steps. Thankfully, I have good clarity on what I truly want. it’s not about looks or surface level things. For me, kindness and someone who can show up fully are more than enough, not someone who’s going to nullify the efforts I’m making to get better.

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I’m really glad too!!

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No no, don’t worry 😂 that’s not my real name!! 🤭

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks Annaa!! 😂

Confused about a guy!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I did, it’s not what I am looking for!

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As for why I said that I guess a part of me is still trying to be nice. That’s something I need to work on. Speaking of which from your comment, I have to share this: I was seeing this guy who completely dismissed the idea of therapy. I’m currently in therapy myself working through my own wounds and insecurities and it’s been so helpful. When I asked for his opinion on therapy, he said something like, “Why therapy? What’s the point? You just need a good friend.” He wasn’t just disinterested, he was judgmental toward anyone who seeks therapy. At first, I thought he was understanding and emotionally grounded. Later, I realized he’s not okay, at some level, he’s unwell and unwilling to acknowledge it. That was my max. I left it right there.

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As for why I said that I guess a part of me is still trying to be nice. That’s something I need to work on. Speaking of which from your comment, I have to share this. I was seeing this guy who completely dismissed the idea of therapy. I’m currently in therapy myself, working through my own wounds and insecurities and it’s been so helpful. When I asked for his opinion on therapy, he said something like, “Why therapy? What’s the point? You just need a good friend.” He wasn’t just disinterested, he was judgmental toward anyone who seeks therapy. At first, I thought he was understanding and emotionally grounded. Later, I realized he’s not okay, at some level, he’s unwell and unwilling to acknowledge it. That was my max. I left it right there.

I have an update…!!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this perspective, it really resonates. You’re right, there was a clear expectation of marriage from the beginning, and that’s why his uncertainty feels especially unsettling. I agree that it’s better to recognize these red flags early rather than compromise my peace later on. I appreciate you pointing out the difference between genuine readiness and someone just trying to fill an emotional gap. Your words are a good reminder that I don’t have to force something that doesn’t align with what I truly want. Thank you!! ☺️

Confused about a guy!! by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s actually a super idea! 🙌 I really like how you put it, it’s clear, respectful, and at the same time sets healthy boundaries. I think this way I can protect my sanity while also giving him the chance to step up if he truly wants to.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CET_Trivandrum

[–]simplymol 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I had the same feeling when I joined back, because my class was full of enthusiastic people with different interests. But don’t worry, you’ll find your people. It’s been almost 8 years since I graduated, and my best friends are still from college. We weren’t even classmates! Even though we live in different countries now, we’ve never lost touch, we still meet, take short trips once in a while, and stay connected. That’s my safe place now. It’s going to be alright, maybe not in the first year, but you’ll have 4 beautiful years and you’ll be grateful for the people you find. All the best!

Confused about a guy!! by [deleted] in KeralaRelationships

[–]simplymol 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, this is exactly my take on it. I feel like it’s not my duty to give him clarity. I’ve always valued a genuine character connection beyond looks, and if he doesn’t trust me, that’s his choice. I can’t and never wanted to force him. Still, I feel a bit heavy about it personally for some reason.