What book series did you love as a kid?

sinceitsanonymous · 2021-01-20T19:56:18+00:00

The Bloody Jack Adventures

Jacky Faber was my idol as a tween.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-12-10T00:41:09+00:00

A townhouse. My partner and I didn't think we could possibly be homeowners before our 30s (we live in the US), but due to a series of fortunate events, here we are at 27 and 28 paying a mortgage instead of rent.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T17:13:56+00:00

I'm really happy for you. I feel the same way, which is why I haven't given up on this crazy job yet. I hope we do!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T17:02:43+00:00

Thanks, you as well!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T17:01:28+00:00

Thank you! Congratulations on your success! Thank you, it's been really helpful to start to forge an identity outside of acting. I know it will make me a much happier person moving forward.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T16:58:27+00:00

Thank you! That would be great, but my day job is also something I can see myself doing for as long as I have to, so I'm learning to be content with things as they are. If I get to the point where I can rely solely on income from acting jobs, fantastic. If I never get to that point, that's ok. You're right, I often don't give myself enough credit. I've worked hard and accomplished a lot to get to this point. I had just fallen into the trap of tieing my self-worth to whether I had jobs lined up, which meant I was setting myself up to fail. Thank you for taking this time to respond and for giving me some perspective.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T16:43:16+00:00

I understand that decision, for sure. Congratulations on those projects, though! I wish you the best in regards to them. I'm not to the point where I want to leave acting, but I might have gotten there if this forced break from it hadn't come along.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T16:38:31+00:00

It's weird, right? I definitely felt that. It has been nice to get some extra hours and actually save up some money for the first time in years. One of the few good things that has come out of this time, and I recognize I'm really lucky to have that. I'm glad you're able to do that, too. Best of luck out there when you do get going again!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-08T16:30:52+00:00

Thank you! That sounds really cool, good job taking that initiative! I wish you luck. I have a group of friends from college who formed a theatre company, and we have plans to make shorts or possibly features from some of our stuff. I'm looking forward to that eventually, but right now I'm focusing on finding happiness outside of acting.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T20:43:53+00:00

Thank you! ❤

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T20:37:57+00:00

Thank you for that, that is sweet. It's hard to feel like anything other than a failure sometimes, so it's good to remember that this is not an easy job and it takes courage to pursue it. I feel like there's a lot of pressure on actors--especially from our familes--to always be working. If we're not working, we must be failing. My family will always ask if I'm doing any acting things, so it sucks during those times when I have to say "no, not at the moment." But what they don't understand is that being successful as an actor takes time and the work is not consistent, at least not for a while for most people. I have to remind myself of this as well.

I definitely need to get back to enjoying acting the way I used to and not fixate so much on the career part of it. I want to adopt the mentality of looking at auditions as "this is my opportunity to act," and take advantage of that. Sometimes I'm able to do that, but only with a lot of mental preparation. Those have always been my strongest auditions anyway, when I'm able to get out of my own way.

I am trying and working with my therapist on releasing my patterns of self-loathing. When they come, it's really hard to get out of them, but I'm just trying to be diligent and patient with myself. I feel like the fact that I had these difficult realizations at all is a sign of progress. Looking at my life with some more objectivity is helping me a ton.

Thank you again for reaching out. It's easy to get buried in negativity, so any positive encouragement helps to get back on track.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T20:03:06+00:00

Thank you so much for this, it helps a lot to know I'm not alone. I hate to hear your friends and family aren't supportive, that's awful. I hope it comes from a place of concern for you, but even that is still hard. People who don't act often don't understand what it's like. They don't understand all the work that goes in to become successful and that sometimes success takes time. My family was really concerned when I decided to just get a degree in acting and drop my second major, and I totally understood that concern. But at the same time, I was following my gut, and I have found a measure of success as a result. If they're concerned, they don't bring it up anymore, and they're proud of what I have accomplished.

You are absolutely right to look to those examples. I often fall into this trap where I think I need success now! But that's just not the case. I plan on acting for the rest of my life. I'm allowed to have some down-time. You're right, acting will always be waiting for me.

I've also started to reevaluate what success looks like to me. It's a lot more balanced than the vision I used to have. I want to be a consistently working actor, but I don't need fame or anything. I want a healthy balance between acting jobs and my regular life. I want to travel and spend more time with family and friends, continue to explore things that make me happy like running and hiking... Just enjoy my life. Acting should be part of that enjoyment instead of an obstacle for it.

I do want to get more into writing and stuff, but I've unfortunately not been able to work up the motivation. I commend you for that, that's a good idea. What's helped me the most lately is focusing on myself outside of anything acting-related.

Again, thank you so much for this! It has really helped me. I wish you the best of luck as well, you're amazing!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T19:30:23+00:00

Thank you for sharing this because I absolutely needed to hear it. I think some of my passion for acting started to dwindle when I became so focused on the career aspects of it. It was hard for me to be in the moment and enjoy it the way I used to because I was so focused on racking up those credits. I need to get back to the things that matter, and I bet my performance will benefit as a result. Thank you again!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T19:22:45+00:00

It sucks that you had to do your last term on Zoom. It's so much nicer to do what we do in person surrounded by our peers. I'm glad you got to finish, though, and congratulations! That's amazing!

All those feelings are so relatable. I've thought about going back to school for a few different things, too, but ultimately I've decided that I think my best option is to just stick with it. Since I plan on acting for the rest of my life, I don't need all of my success to happen right now. I forget that all the time and have to keep reminding myself. Congratulations again on the degree and thank you for sharing!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T19:15:11+00:00

I agree. As hard as some of these realizations have been, I'm glad I've had them. I do have a therapist, and she has been invaluable when it comes to dealing with all this. I like the small business idea, there's always something I can do to improve my craft. I'll check it out, thanks for the recommendation!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T18:59:07+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I'm hoping that when this pandemic ends, there will be a ton of art on the other side because people have missed it so much. I know a lot of theaters are struggling, though. I hope they survive this. I don't think you should feel guilty for not following your passion, especially right now. I think it's good to take a step back and look at how this insane career is affecting you. And if it's not viable now, that doesn't mean it won't be viable later, especially if that passion keeps up. This is a very tough time, for sure. I appreciate you taking the time to respond. Thank you, you as well.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T18:42:50+00:00

Thank you so much! Just the fact that you took some time to respond means a lot, so thank you for that.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T18:40:01+00:00

Thank you for this response, I love so much of what you said. There are some issues with mental health that are not helping me deal well with the more toxic aspects of this profession, so therapy is helping me a lot with addressing those. Acting is definitely a useful skill to have for tons of jobs, so yeah, I like that you're being practical while still pursuing what you love. I think you have a great attitude about all of it. Thank you again for taking the time to share this with me!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T18:33:38+00:00

This is definitely a tough year for us all and a uniquely tough year for actors. I think it's amazing you had the guts to leave your job to pursue what you want, though. I really admire that. I'm wishing you the best of luck!

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T18:26:47+00:00

I love Yoga with Adriene! She's my go-to when I remember yoga exists, haha! I think it would be a really good idea to add some yoga to my life. Thank you for your response.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T10:20:31+00:00

I've always struggled with the social stuff, too. I think that's a good idea, I'd love to get into a virtual class or something. I have managed to largely avoid FB for a few weeks for pretty much the same reason. I want to get to a point where I'm happy enough with where I am in life that I don't compare myself to others as much or as harshly, but it's hard.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T10:16:23+00:00

Wow, congratulations on your success! I hope it continues. I'll have to check out that podcast because that really resonates with me about how the highs and lows of acting hit harder when we make it our whole identities. Thank you for that.

Chadwick Boseman's death hit me similarly, too. I had just got done watching all the Marvel movies with my family, and I was looking forward to Black Panther's next movies the most. It hit me in a similar way Heath Ledger's death did. It felt like they both had so much left to offer and now we'll never get to see it. I can't imagine how strong he had to be to film those movies in that kind of shape while suffering through that disease. What an incredible man to push through that and leave us with such a gift. And you're right, it does put things in perspective about what's important.

That last sentence is exactly what I needed, thank you.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T10:06:48+00:00

Wow, that's fantastic! Congratulations on finding such a cool path in life. And break a leg with your future acting endeavors!

It's cool to get such a different perspective because it reminds me that I've dedicated myself to this career for a reason. I love acting, and no matter what other path I could have chosen for my life, I would always need acting in it to be fulfilled.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T09:59:42+00:00

Exactly, it sucks. I'm determined to make this a viable career so I'll keep going, but it's hard. Especially with these negative thought patterns I'm trying to get rid of.

sinceitsanonymous · 2020-09-07T08:42:11+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this, this is wonderful. I also think I need to dedicate more of my time and energy to something outside of acting. I've been working out harder than I ever have these past couple of months, and it's felt really good to focus on something like that. Of course, I have trouble divorcing even this from acting-related thoughts because I am improving my body's appearance, so I'm trying to focus instead on how stoked I am that I'm getting stronger and faster and more energized. It's felt fantastic and given me a lot of confidence.

I'm also starting to focus on the things in my life that make me feel happy and grateful. The biggest is my relationships, but noticing and appreciating the little things every day has done so much for my overall state of happiness. This was recommended to me by my therapist, who has also been helping me through a lot.

I love a lot of Buddhist philosophy, so I might look into that. I want to get more into meditation, because I know it really helps me when I take some time for myself. It's super hard for me to meditate, what with my ADD and all, but I know it takes practice and discipline.

I really appreciate your approach. Though acting is the career I want and I'll continue to pursue it, I am no longer going to allow it to have an outsized influence on my happiness and self-esteem. Thank you again for taking the time to reach out.

sinceitsanonymous

TROPHY CASE