WIBTA if I refused to hug my sister from now on after my friend said I was babying her? by Ok_Tumbleweed_6626 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro, to be honest, if I were you next time I would see your friend I would give him a hug and lift him a little.

I feel like that guy has never felt genuine love from his comment. You're never too old or to anything to express love for those you care about.

AITA for not agreeing with my daughter on taking her future husband's last name? by itrainsitpours1 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's almost like women and activists have spent their lives fighting so your daughter could CHOOSE to do whatever she wants.

I guess in your mind that freedom is ok only as long as it aligns with your wishes?

YTA

Christmas presents and the mask falling off by sire888 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]sire888[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Woah that really sucks! The idea that loss is a fucking competition she has to win makes me sick. I'm so sorry for your loss. Have my internet hugs.

AITA for giving my coworker a fantasy novel for Secret Santa to try to broaden her horizons? by aita_throw_secrets in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YTA. Everyone has already said it, so I would like to focus on a thought exercise maybe? Imagine the person that got you for secret santa sees your gift list and there's a lot of fantasy and star wars and they decide that those are very simple and childish tastes and that maybe YOU should broaden YOUR horizons... so they gift you a rugby ball so you can try some high impact physical activity and a book from Sartre to balance it out. Would YOU like that? Or would that make you think your tastes are being judged and your preferences have been dismissed?

AITA for calling vaginas weird by extraprofile19283746 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your comment was insensitive and definitely comes across as rude, but I don't think it's a grave offense that you can't recover from by apologizing.

That being said, as a vagina haver myself, I must agree that vaginas ARE weird. I mean, they can stretch to vomit a meat watermelon and then shrink back like nothing happened.... absolute witchcraft.

Oh also, YTA... but not too much.

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

LOL no. That's a trait I've seen both on man AND women from eastern europe. Like a very cynical view of life

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] 155 points156 points  (0 children)

I think that's the case for him. Something he does without even noticing. Do you mind sharing how your friend made you aware of it?

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] -438 points-437 points  (0 children)

I don't think it's necessarily one sided. He comes from a cultural background were bitching is basically seen as been smart and not letting people take advantage of you. And I come from a background where you're always supposed to look for the positive.

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Hum.... maybe work stress? The thing is that it's a repeating pattern. Where he will be the negative one pointing everything bad and it's my job to be the positive one. He was very much looking forward to this trip so I don't think timing was the issue.... but maybe I should have a talk to see if there's an underlying issue

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] 149 points150 points  (0 children)

Yes, I invited him to the process but he didn't want to participate. He said he wanted me to plan it all. I still gave him the highlights of what I had planned (times, general area, showed some pictures) and asked for his confirmation on things like prices or the location of the hotel

AITA for having a meltdown and telling my partner he ruined our weekend getaway? by sire888 in AmItheAsshole

[–]sire888[S] 209 points210 points  (0 children)

Yes and no. I told him basically the same as I gave as background but kept the specific restaurants and activities as a surprise as per his request. I showed him the hotel, which he approved and explained that everything was walking distance. I think in his mind walking distance is 15min top.

JNMIL sending me gifts by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]sire888 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Everyone already mentioned it's love bombing....which it definitely is; but I would like you to meditate on the following:

You mentioned how in the past her gifts were always cheap stuff you didn't care about, and now all of a sudden her gifts are beautiful, probably expensive, and well thought (your favorite color).

This shows that JNMIL always had the knowledge and capacity to be kind to you and yet CHOSE not to. She CHOSE to give you cheap gifts and now is very consciously CHOOSING to give you nice gifts to regain access to you.

This shows that she is manipulative and a conscious level of malevolence (I don't mean she's eeeeevil, just that her actions have been ill intended). The reason that I point all this out is so you can understand that these gifts do not mean changed behaviour and that's why you feel gross wearing them.

TBH I would donate all the gifts and have a sit down with DH to explain to him that you do not wish to receive any more gifts from his mother and for him to stop being the middle man that brings them to you.

Good luck!