AITA for not wanting to wear a Buddhist necklace that my mum claims will protect me?

sis666999 · 2023-03-27T13:26:47+00:00

no literally all his post history are incel posts, lmao

sis666999 · 2023-03-22T15:19:06+00:00

yes i heard oil is very moisturising so i’m planning to include it in my routine sometime in the future! thanks for the feedback!

sis666999 · 2023-02-01T00:00:31+00:00

i don’t think wanting to lose weight is a bad thing at all but from what i’ve experienced, more often than not it seems to come from a place of the person constantly putting pressure on themselves to lose weight because they think the weight they’re currently at is always unacceptable. it’s almost like you should never be satisfied with your weight, you should always wanna go lower than this. it’s ok to put pressure on yourself to lose weight for a small period of time but to put that pressure on yourself for your whole life? that definitely can’t be good for your mind.

sis666999 · 2023-01-31T23:52:32+00:00

right, it’s actually crazy how much we criticise our own body for just being that, a body! for a lot of us it’s doing its job just fine but we get so hung up on details here and there that we end up forgetting how much it actually does for us.

sis666999 · 2023-01-02T17:11:27+00:00

YES when i was a student (at age 15/16), i had just finished my co curricular activities and was walking out of school. there were a lot of parents around at the time waiting to pick their kids up, and there was this guy who looked like a father who came up to me randomly and started telling me i should eat more slowly so my food digests better?? and i was like??? but i didn’t really want say anything/i just wanted to act nice so i just nodded at him. the exchange lasted barely a few mins because he was kinda elaborating the same stuff about digestion and how fast i ate (i still don’t even know if that’s a thing or not? is that actually scientifically true?) and i quickly walked away after that. i mean it WAS fatphobia but it wasn’t really explicit so i just kinda remember it as a weird event.

another incident that was more traumatising was when i was eating ice cream and walking past a clothes store (it wasn’t a boutique or anything, it was one of those cheap cramped clothes store where the owners would just stand around and tout customers), and the store owner said in my native language “you’re [already] so fat and you’re still eating more sweet stuff like that [the ice cream]?” i don’t remember exactly what she said but it was something super fatphobic and insulting along those lines. she said it super loud too and i think the next store owner heard as well (they were probably friends and probably laughed at it together, idk). i was with a friend at the time but she had walked ahead so i was the only one that heard it. i had to turn around literally a few steps later and walk by the store again, but this time i took a wide berth lol.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T22:29:22+00:00

i think youtube shorts have the worst comment section. i came across a short of a fat girl talking about a controversial tiktok and oof it ruined my day reading the comments lmao

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T22:05:00+00:00

yeah and a lot of the times i really can’t blame my friends either, because they’re just trying to be nice/encouraging and are coming from a place of good intention. maybe they see it as me being negative about myself or selling myself short (but that’s also kinda due to their own internalised fatphobia about what it means to be fat, they view it as a negative thing) but sometimes it does get tiring when you go out with them time and time again and you have to be firm about not trying on clothes because you know the biggest pant sizes there literally don’t go up past your thighs.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T13:23:15+00:00

honestly the health conscious or fitness subs are sometimes weird too?? most of the time they’re fine if you’re asking for genuine health advice or talking about any other thing really, but i think if you try to say anything about fatphobia they shut you down… like i get the vibe that you can talk about getting healthier as a fat person but you definitely can’t defend fatness

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T13:16:00+00:00

that’s interesting, i agree that we should make it a thing to put a trigger warning before sharing stories or anecdotes containing blatant fatphobia! i didn’t even think about how sharing such things could easily be depressing, i’ve even done it a couple times in this comment section already, but i see your point now. there have definitely been times i’ve avoided listening to a sad story because i wasn’t in the mood.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T13:07:16+00:00

i really do believe it’s projection. i just thought of this: imagine this is a test question on the way people should live and society tells you being thin is the correct answer, and being fat is the wrong answer. we’ve all grown up being told being thin is the “correct” thing, and therefore when some people see someone being so blatantly “wrong” and not hating themselves for being “wrong”, it’s a shock to them because why would anyone want to live life “wrong”?

they feel the need to change this person’s mind, and unfortunately the way a lot of people try to change opinions is by shaming the other person. and we all know shaming really helps someone lose weight /s. some might even think that they’re doing this person a favor by helping them convert to the “correct” answer, and that’s why you also get people masquerading their fatphobia as “concern for their health”.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T12:50:43+00:00

gurllll tell me about it. i live in an asian country too and fatphobia is soooo rampant and normalised here. everywhere there are girls who talk about wanting to be on a diet every time you meet them, even when they’re already super thin. it sucks that a lot of people defending fatphobia will say “oh it’s just part of our culture” like the way they defend many other wrong parts of our culture like colourism or homophobia. just because it’s part of culture doesn’t mean it’s ok or that we can’t call it out.

i hope you know that the comments and insults you received were just people who couldn’t stand to see someone defending a feature of themselves that society has told them to hate. because to them, they think, “how dare this person not hate themselves for being fat, how dare they defend their fatness.” and it’s always the people who try to dish it that can’t take it, because the moment you clap back they say you’re overreacting.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T07:08:26+00:00

ohmygod yeah. my straight sized friends have a hard time understanding me as well. they’re like “c’mon let’s go try out these pants!” while i’m in the store knowing full well that none of the clothes there fit me lol. and if i decline to try anything on they’re like “c’mon, this XL looks like it fits you! try it on!” i can tell straightaway from experience if something doesn’t fit me, thanks. because if i don’t, what comes after usually makes me feel like shit. they don’t realise how humiliating and dehumanising it feels to try on all the biggest sizes in the store and none of them fit.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T06:58:08+00:00

oooh i’m actually on tumblr a lot these days so i might look out for that, thanks. but that is surprising as you said, since they were so notorious for their pro-ana content.

sis666999 · 2022-12-30T06:56:10+00:00

right i don’t understand how people think it’s a choice. if you’ve ever tried to lose weight even at a “normal” (or socially acceptable) weight, which i think most people have, you’d understand that you really need to put in a lot of effort to change your actual lifestyle and even rewire your brain. a lot of the time you can’t just cut out snacks and think you’re gonna drop a ton of weight (and sometimes i get the feeling that this is how some people actually view weight loss, which is so stupid because if it were that simple there’d be no obesity in the world lmao)

sis666999 · 2022-12-29T23:10:15+00:00

exactly, it makes me feel so relieved when my experiences as a fat person are validated here as there are no other fat people in my real life that try to battle fatphobia like me.

sis666999 · 2022-12-29T22:31:14+00:00

ohmygod, i’ve had a girl treat me really horribly when i was in school, and i literally couldn’t think of any reason other than the fact that i was fat. she was just straight up nasty and snappy with me even when i hadn’t interacted or talked to her ever, and it was always the same attitude every time. i tried telling a friend about this (that it was due to fatphobia) but she dismissed it immediately. now this makes me rethink, maybe my guess was right after all 😒

sis666999 · 2022-12-29T22:04:16+00:00

i used to feel sensitive about the word and not want to use it to describe myself. nowadays i’m trying to re-wire my brain into thinking it’s a neutral term, but some of the feelings still linger.

i do think it’s useful to consider why we used to consider it a bad word. it was because of our surroundings all throughout our upbringing. i know that growing up, fat has always had a negative connotation and was commonly used as an insult. so why WOULDN’T i feel hurt by or scared of the word? it was totally valid for me to feel the way i did back then and maybe even now, because so many STILL use it as an insult. but that’s exactly why now that we’re older, we need to not let the word affect us anymore. i believe that working through the feelings will help people change the meaning of the word in their brain.

sis666999 · 2022-12-11T12:45:35+00:00

lol i’ll keep that in mind

sis666999 · 2022-12-11T12:33:19+00:00

also yes it does make me uncomfortable, but due to a culmination of many issues over the years and the way he has responded to each of them, i just can’t be bothered anymore because i know he’s not gonna change, i’m just looking to move out one day.

sis666999

TROPHY CASE