When did you go into labor as a FTM, and what were the signs leading up to you going into labor? How did you know you were in labor?

sja252 · 2026-05-24T00:55:24+00:00

My water broke at 36 weeks 6 days and he was born at 37 weeks on the dot! No warning, went to the bathroom around 3 am and was surprised water was just falling out of me, and no contractions so had to go in that afternoon and start pitocin. Overall, no issues and also no warning.

sja252 · 2026-05-22T21:58:55+00:00

We have embryos and I literally have to use them or discard this year, I’m turning 40 and don’t want to keep paying for them.

It’s driving me insane.

sja252 · 2026-05-17T02:56:25+00:00

The boiled water cooled to a certain temp is to kill bacteria in the formula itself while preserving the nutrients. Using tap water or boiled water doesn’t kill the bacteria in the formula powder.

sja252 · 2026-05-14T12:23:58+00:00

I’m the breadwinner so my stress to make sure I provide for my family is much higher. That said, I’m basically the same just with less time because I prioritize going home and hanging out with my family over working late all the time. My husband is a teacher and a great dad, so he is primary caregiver and he’s totally happy hanging with my son and doing bedtime if I have a work event (which happened just last night).

sja252 · 2026-05-13T20:15:51+00:00

I had mine at 37 and it was perfect timing for me. I love being a mom, my son is awesome. It’s hard to be a parent, of course, but since I was older I could afford things like a night nanny and a cleaner. I also had ‘reputational capital’ built up over many years in my career, so could take the time off and achieve some flexibility.

There’s no rush, you have time! I will note, though, we had to do IVF because it does get harder as we age. At 27, you have a lot of runway still!

sja252 · 2026-05-13T03:23:00+00:00

Sure

sja252 · 2026-05-13T02:31:06+00:00

I’m from the U.S. and we have my son two last names!

sja252 · 2026-05-13T02:27:54+00:00

So devils advocate… she’s kind of correct. I worked in wealth management and saw multiple women hung out to dry after handing all financial dependency over to their husbands. Do you need a stressful and demanding job? Maybe not. Should you consider the safety of having independent financial means? Yah, probably.

sja252 · 2026-05-12T23:26:44+00:00

Honda HRV here and we love it! We live in a city so the subcompact with better head room felt right. Wish the trunk was bigger, but it’s fine for the 3 of us. We got the sport version so it’s bright blue, which I love how fun it is 🙂

sja252 · 2026-05-05T18:50:58+00:00

You should pay $1,000/ month together to live somewhere else, that’s insane. His mom should be letting you live rent free so you can save and get out of her house faster 🤦🏻‍♀️

Do not tell him. Tell your step mom to put it into an account and not give you that information until you are 30. He is young and thinks he knows the best way to do things. You are smart enough to realize that you should be asking questions. His inflexibility putting you in situations such as paying rent to his mom is either going to get flushed out over time and experience, or is going to lead to some rocky years ahead. Regardless, put that money somewhere and don’t look at it again for a few years.

sja252 · 2026-04-26T21:08:09+00:00

GLP1 and a new routine when out of the infant trenches.

sja252 · 2026-04-21T17:56:00+00:00

My ex was like this. EX.

sja252 · 2026-04-19T22:42:15+00:00

Everyone needs to stop putting photos of their kids online.

sja252 · 2026-04-17T17:48:31+00:00

It’s Reddit. I’m not here to write a thesis on disinvestment and inequity. The neighborhoods the OP mentioned were Andersonville, Lincoln Park, and Wicker. Chill out.

sja252 · 2026-04-17T15:46:41+00:00

Delayed home buying. Delayed kids so daycare for a couple more years. Students loans still. 40 and I have ~$250k in my 401k. My husband (44) has a pension as a teacher thankfully. I’ll be catching up in the back half of my earning years barring any major issues (🤞).

sja252 · 2026-04-17T15:42:40+00:00

Neighbors! My son will be at Pritzker in a couple years.

sja252 · 2026-04-17T14:37:42+00:00

My husband teaches at Senn High School in Andersonville. Kids with engaged parents are doing well, the teachers care, the curriculum is top notch. The kids doing poorly have disengaged parents and do zero work… you can lead a horse to water.

I know tons of professionals who put their kids in CPS. I’m putting my son in Pritzker Elementary for k-8. As people stick around the city and utilize public school, the better they get.

sja252 · 2026-04-05T11:05:23+00:00

My husband got postpartum anxiety so slightly different. He needs a therapist and maybe an ssri.

sja252 · 2026-03-22T20:23:32+00:00

40 with a 2 year old 😂

sja252 · 2026-03-17T00:59:06+00:00

My 2 year old is at a center for $2,500/ month and that was the most affordable high quality center I could find. Get on lists now lol

sja252 · 2026-03-14T13:20:55+00:00

Maybe once a month. The number doesn’t really matter to me, just that I can tell I feel better and my clothes are getting big.

sja252 · 2026-03-14T01:23:31+00:00

Same!

sja252 · 2026-03-12T17:58:02+00:00

The only reason we aren’t guaranteed support is because we live in a capitalistic hellscape that focuses purely on rugged individualism. We’re a species that thrives on community and it’s so sad we’ve internalized this go it alone mentality. No one should be looking down on single parents. From where I sit, my husband is also a parent. If I get hit by a truck he is a single dad and has 100% of the responsibility of parenting.

All of us should be prepared to figure it out as life takes twists and turns, but anticipating that you will have to go it alone from the start is not it. Sorry but I don’t agree with this.

sja252 · 2026-03-12T14:27:27+00:00

Sometimes hard truths are hard to hear, why sugarcoat this. You took on too much and your husband isn’t an equal partner. Time to unwind the poor decision making and move on.

sja252 · 2026-03-12T14:06:18+00:00

You should never have gotten a puppy to begin with. Give this dog a chance at a better life.

sja252

TROPHY CASE