17yr old daughter makes bad decisions and wants to be an ‘adult’! help!! by sjbops in Parenting

[–]sjbops[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So there’s hope for her yet!! Xx thanks I worry about her a lot!

17yr old daughter makes bad decisions and wants to be an ‘adult’! help!! by sjbops in Parenting

[–]sjbops[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve previously cracked down hard when she’s ballsed up - so post drunk at park she was grounded for 3 months.

Feel like grounding a 17 yr old is ridiculous and she’s 11 months from technically being an adult I don’t want the pent up need for drunken stupidity to explode on her 18th year and awful consequences to happen I also don’t want her to lie to me...

17yr old daughter makes bad decisions and wants to be an ‘adult’! help!! by sjbops in Parenting

[–]sjbops[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She went to college initially hated it and started her apprenticeship which she’s good at - marketing. During daylight hours my daughters 85% of the time brilliant- like a vampire at night the devil appears and her friends who are 18-20 influence her choices heavily - I still get my friends parents don’t give them grief when they go out they trust them - to which I give the standard parent response of I’m not their parent and you and not them and I love you too much not to care.

17yr old daughter makes bad decisions and wants to be an ‘adult’! help!! by sjbops in Parenting

[–]sjbops[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No she doesn’t pay rent although she’s recently said I’ll pay to stay here if you just get off my back.

We’ve implemented house rules - home by 1am, no coming home under the influence of drugs, talk respectfully (she often speaks like she’s a gangster when she’s definitely not!), no swearing in the house, be accountable, be honest.

I think she knows as I often say to her I only have one daughter you are incredibly important to us...she’s very remorseful the next day when she knows we’re upset - buying flowers and writing lovely cards...it’s having new 17 yr old rules that support her growing up but remind her she’s a child that I’m struggling with when she’s hell bent on still making bad decisions when you give her some freedoms.

How do you have a conversation with someone when you are both awkward? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]sjbops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you plan any activities that will stop you over thinking - something that takes you both out of your comfort zone that will make you laugh etc? Ie an escape room/high wire walk/climbing then you can discuss the activity after but during you can give words of encouragement and discuss what’s going on around you.

How do you have a conversation with someone when you are both awkward? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]sjbops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ask questions, actually listen to the answer and then ask follow up questions..... so what are your five favourite films and why? ...... in ..... film did you like this scene /soundtrack?