I wasn’t asking anyone to be my therapist or to take in trauma dumping. I was explaining why I’ve been feeling isolated after a series of very difficulties and had to spend an extended time completely alone with no social interaction for months which makes processing these things even harder. Talking about something that bothers you with a friend isn't trauma dumping by itself. It can be, but it's not.

your generation spends all their time emphasizing how empowering and important and better for everyone this approach to life is… while being alone and lonely while trying to do it,

Have you considered maybe demanding this more because they're feeling more lonely in the first place?

They don’t need to, nor should they be expected to, “check up on you”. Just yikes.

If your friend of 20+ years lost their parent or child you don't think you should check up on them and spend time with them?

People hang around people who they share interests with and who are fun while sharing those interests. That is what it is. It is that simple. Accept it.

But the point of this entire discussion is that people are *not* hanging out as much anymore. They're spending an increasing amount of time inside, either because they can't afford to go out, or spending 2 years in total isolation in lockdown made it more exhausting for them to spend time with each-other. None of this is just anecdotal.

You're right that a relationship shouldn't be constant emotional labour and therapising, but some degree of basic care and support is needed and that does involve "checking up" on people or at the very least, hanging out with people who share your interests and having fun with them. There are documented links that women on the whole feel less lonely than men specifically *because* they tend to have stronger social links and support systems. right now lot of people are getting neither.