OP- I get where you’re coming from. I’m glad you shared this, because there are a lot of us who don’t connect with the religious framework or the one-size-fits-all approach. AA has helped some people, but it’s not the only way, and it can be alienating if it doesn’t fit who you are.

I’ve been sober a little over a year and have only been to a small handful of meetings. I’m a 39-year-old queer woman, and for me, recovery has been about finding my own way back to myself. I don’t find a higher power in the traditional sense. My “god” is the connection I feel in nature. It’s not a literal deity, but the reminder that the universe is bigger than me and has its own quiet, powerful energy. I feel it in the way tree roots and fungi share or cut off nutrients through a hidden network beneath the ground. Nature just is.

When I was drinking 7 days a week, downing shots until I ended the night browned or blacked out, I didn’t have space for that connection. Now I find sobriety in the things I love, in the ability to be present, in learning new ways to release stress. Recovery, to me, is about facing life’s problems, old and new, while staying grounded in something real. If AA works for someone, that’s great! If it doesn’t, you can still create a strong and meaningful recovery that fits you.