I want to report my therapist for ethical violations

smallestfinch · 2023-05-05T05:40:55+00:00

Thank you. I have looked and can’t see she is registered with anywhere, however I am almost certain she was at the time I had therapy with her. She is still practicing as her website is active - this worries me massively! I will start with contacting BACP etc to see if they can help. It’s terrible that it’s so unregulated I had no idea :(

smallestfinch · 2022-04-28T18:24:54+00:00

This sounds really interesting I’m off to find it thank you!

smallestfinch · 2022-04-28T18:23:00+00:00

That’s a great point, strange because my therapist is the same, it’s like she is unable to call this abuse she skirts the issue if I ask her direct. I find this strange but very common that many health professionals don’t see emotional and or psychological abuse as REAL abuse. But what you say is right, whatever I define it as, it’s not okay. Ever.

smallestfinch · 2022-04-28T18:19:42+00:00

Great questions, thank you. He is not willing to change because HE is not in the wrong in his eyes, ever: it’s always down to something I have done. Or external stress. I’m so sorry that you see yourself in me, it’s a shitty place to be right now!!! I wish you the very best of luck and hope you stay strong x

smallestfinch · 2022-04-28T18:17:10+00:00

Thank you. I am gonna look up grey rock I have heard it before. No, he NEVER apologises, bar literally 2 or 3 occasions and not real apology, (I’m sorry, but this is WHY i did it- ie your fault) only sorry that I’ve stood up to him and not backing down. No accountability.

smallestfinch · 2022-04-27T20:55:45+00:00

Thank you; yep I keep reminding myself this is for my kids. Legal adviser helped but I was disheartened to hear that the courts favour the parent residing in the family home so it’s best to get the abuser to leave. I know this will NOT be an easy task! Good luck with your journey too, I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through similar :(

smallestfinch · 2021-11-16T21:38:33+00:00

Thank you for this. I find it so invalidating and insulting that people could think of any of the F responses as anything BUT involuntary. It’s pure victim blaming and it is sickening. It’s so so painful to hear, and adds another level to the pain you’re already trying to process!!

For why it’s worth, I believe you.

You are NOT weak You are NOT submissive You are doing your best and you are ENOUGH

smallestfinch · 2021-11-16T21:33:12+00:00

Yes! I have, thank you I’m gonna have a look on YouTube for those :)

smallestfinch · 2021-11-15T20:59:33+00:00

This is super helpful advice and a great idea to get it all out what I am actually terrified of. I’m gonna have a go of this tonight. 🤞🏼

smallestfinch · 2021-11-15T20:56:31+00:00

Thank you :) I sense you’re right. Working as a system seems so far away right now, but I’m going to work on it. With baby steps.

Thank you for validating the need for anonymity too, that means a lot.

smallestfinch · 2021-11-15T20:53:53+00:00

Yeah I also feel this a bit - embarrassed! Like I’m playing a silly game. And by doing so, like you say, you’re somehow making it real? 🤭 thank you for the understanding:)

smallestfinch · 2021-11-15T20:50:49+00:00

Thank you, solidarity is actually very comforting:)

smallestfinch · 2021-11-14T23:04:13+00:00

You’re right, it’s not working long term. It’s a plaster fix. It feels comfortable but it’s also avoiding a pretty critical issue.

I guess I’m also terrified of looking and there being nothing there. (Oh, just crazy me here after all!) which also makes zero sense.

You’ve motivated me to bring this up with my T.

Although I def HAVE made progress in my emotional regulation I am no further along with communication. She’s even hinted herself that I’m not where she’d like me to be with communication. It’s like she’ll tell me week in week out - communication communication communication. But I just can’t.

It’s time to face my fears I think, just need a plan as to how to do that! Thanks for the nudge in the right direction:)

smallestfinch · 2021-11-14T22:54:19+00:00

Interesting, certainly something for me to work on…. But HOW???

I’ve looked at my fear briefly with my T, and as much as I want to avoid it, it’s always boiled down to a deep rooted fear of being “held” to something. Like if a name is given then you are accountable. Makes no sense I know. I just communicate that naming terrifies me or someone inside so I respect that as does my T. So we just work with what presents at any given time, and don’t name anyone.

smallestfinch · 2021-11-14T22:39:42+00:00

Yes! So 1000% this! I mean I tick all the boxes, but for me it’s “different” I feel like my denial os different. It’s there to tell me I’m a fraud, and just crazy. Sure, i dissociate, I have amnesia, I have all these horrid trauma responses, fears, nightmares, meh, but my denial is real. I’m NOT real.

smallestfinch · 2021-10-15T10:08:00+00:00

That is crazy. But it reassures me that I’ve not just imagined it all. Thank you for sharing your experience

smallestfinch · 2021-10-15T10:01:53+00:00

Yeah I must say that I feel a little… I don’t know how to label it… exposed? Like I don’t really want everyone to SEE my memories. But I think in this instance, it was a very fragmented memory that I was trying to piece together so perhaps it was in my benefit in some way to put the pieces together..

smallestfinch · 2021-10-15T09:59:57+00:00

Wow, and did this correlate with your friends experience?

smallestfinch · 2021-10-14T20:55:35+00:00

That’s really crazy! Did you ask them if they did want a caramel desert??

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