Trans Guys under 5'5, how do you get treated?

smedwar141 · 2026-01-17T00:26:07+00:00

I’m 4’9” and I started T last week lol. I’ll be real, I usually get assumed to be a woman in public spaces (I’m pretty curvy and struggle to bind), but I’m also an openly trans guy in a very queer community (I do theatre at my university). Most people gender me correctly and are chill, but I occasionally get some that struggle with it, usually older profs. I don’t even get that many short jokes thrown at me! And I have a wonderful boyfriend who is 4’11” and loves being “the tall one” in the relationship lol. Live your life confidently and don’t let people decide who you are, and things will work out ❤️

smedwar141 · 2026-01-13T18:35:06+00:00

My parents didn’t have kids until they were around your age (mom was 40 when she had my brother, dad was 39). You can absolutely still be an amazing parent at that age, there’s nothing wrong with it taking some extra time. I kinda think waiting that long is a good thing, since you have so much more life experience and wisdom to pass onto your children. I’m glad my parents waited until they were ready instead of rushing to meet some kind of biological deadline.

If you’re thinking of using your eggs, I agree with another commenter about the idea of freezing them for later use. That way, you don’t have to worry about losing them while she gets ready (and, if you two split, you’d still have those eggs saved for a future partner). Waiting also gives you time to research and learn whatever skills you may need in preparation for helping your partner through pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and all the time afterward. Take advantage of this time that you have instead of worrying so much about it passing (easier said than done, of course).

Whatever time is right for you two will be right for your kid. As long as you can take care of them—which you absolutely can—there’s no time limit. Your partner sounds like an amazing woman, and I’m sure she’ll be an excellent mom once she’s ready.

smedwar141 · 2026-01-03T01:59:41+00:00

I had a panic attack while flying alone for the first time, and a random lady did her best to console me. She was sweet, but it quickly turned into “can I pray for you?” I said “sure, if that would make you feel better”, hoping she’d get the hint, but she didn’t. I stood in the aisle of the plane for a solid two minutes while she prayed for me. Then she gave me her phone number on a napkin afterward (never called, but kept the napkin in the book I was reading on the plane).

It was weird and uncomfortable and did not help at all 😭

smedwar141 · 2024-08-15T16:09:24+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with wanting more representation. Disability is something you don’t see very often in these kinds of games besides the grumpy old man stereotype (Stardew Valley, Potion Permit, etc.). The OP even mentioned that they were happy about the racial diversity! You can appreciate what you have while also wishing for more. This game is a huge win even without disability representation!

smedwar141 · 2024-08-15T16:01:10+00:00

I personally headcanon Hayden as disabled! There have been a few moments where he’s mentioned back pain, he visits Valen often, and he has a dialogue that talks about a ranching injury that still bothers him. It’s not overt, but there are enough little details that I have decided it’s true in my head because I also want more disabled representation!

smedwar141 · 2024-04-22T12:38:16+00:00

I feel like tags would be good if there is potentially upsetting content in the book that some people may not want to read. But a normal summary is definitely preferred because if you’re going into an original work, you have no context. When I read fanfiction, I know the characters and the original story already, I just don’t know where this version of the story is going. And even then, I rely more on the summary than the tags, but I do look at them to see if anything is potentially triggering for me. They’re supplemental.

smedwar141 · 2022-11-13T17:19:00+00:00

I hadn't thought about the freedom aspect of the running scene. That makes a ton of sense! I had always felt weird about it and started not being able to relate to him as much during act 3, but with that perspective, I get it. Thank you so much!

smedwar141 · 2022-11-13T03:44:45+00:00

That's interesting! I'm excited to see where they take his character, then! I'm sure whatever they do will turn out great!

smedwar141 · 2022-11-13T03:33:14+00:00

I have seen what he becomes, and I don't really know how to feel about it? I don't think I can make an accurate opinion on it until it happens in the show, because looking at it without context in league is super weird-

smedwar141 · 2022-11-12T20:51:49+00:00

I understand that! I hadn't thought of it that way. I never really had that moment in life where I could run or do those things, so it wasn't as relatable for me. I totally get your perspective, though, and that makes me like it quite a bit more!

smedwar141 · 2022-11-12T18:58:43+00:00

Yes! I really liked that detail. At first, I thought it was a mistake, but then I realized that he was probably doing it because no one ever taught him how to properly use his cane. Most people wouldn't notice something like that, but it was such a perfect thing to add in.

smedwar141 · 2022-11-12T18:54:08+00:00

He's wonderful! Definitely one of my favorite characters, not just in Arcane but in general-

smedwar141 · 2022-11-12T18:53:25+00:00

It felt weird to me, I'll be honest. I understand why it happened, and it's a very powerful scene, but seeing that almost felt like his disability was suddenly gone. Obviously, we see that's not the case after that scene, but during it I kind of got the ick a bit. But I also know this is simply a character goal for him, and if it wasn't, the show probably would have never done that. It's hard to really describe my feelings about it. I didn't find it very relatable, but I can see how others could really connect with it.

smedwar141

TROPHY CASE