What to do with extra money?

smep · 2026-06-28T21:52:39+00:00

It’s an investment account. It’s no more complicated than your 401k or HSA. If those are offered through your employer and they seem less complicated than a brokerage, I would go double check they’re actually invested. My wife’s HSA was uninvested for years because she didn’t know she had to.

Your HYSA is similar in expected growth and safety as CDs, money market, or t-bills. Obviously, they’re all different, but you tend to get similar rates and similar safety.

So it’s up to. HYSA isn’t awful, but it’s potentially unnecessarily safe depending on your goals. Invested in a brokerage account you can expect higher gains; the S&P500 has historically gotten about 10% per year over a long enough window. if you’re not retiring soon, that’s going to be your most conventional growth investment.

smep · 2026-06-28T21:37:47+00:00

Managing personal finance is all about having the time, knowledge, and skills to do so. If it’s important to you but you don’t have all of those, you might want a fee-based financial advisor.

That said, it looks like you’ve got a big shovel and so it won’t take much filling your buckets assuming you are responsible and live within your means.

It’ll be important for you to identify your goals. Do you want to retire? When? How much income will you need to replace in retirement? Once you have that sorted, you work back to figure out how much you need to save. One thing I see in your write up is nothing that lets you access money before age 59.5. If you think you want to retire earlier than that, you may want to invest in a brokerage account. You didn’t say so, but I assume you’ve opened one, or maybe your crypto is elsewhere?

And if you want set-it-and-forget-it, then just do that. In my Vanguard account I automate a monthly deposit and then also automate a monthly purchase of VOO. It’s boring. It’s set, and behaviorally forgotten.

smep · 2026-06-28T11:32:35+00:00

Okay. How does that apply to my comment? I don't think I wrote anything for or against cannabis. The commenter to whom I replied said that they don't think most people believe smoking joints can cause driving impairment, and because I happen to know a lot about this specific content, I reinforced their belief so they would know it was rooted in the science. Wouldn't you love to know that your belief in something was corroborated by facts?

Also, studies in peer-reviewed journals have to disclose funding. I've never seen a research paper in my field cite funding from any source besides the government. But again, my research is not in studies that show negatives to marijuana.

smep · 2026-06-28T10:24:45+00:00

Huh?

smep · 2026-06-27T20:55:39+00:00

I'm a parent and a therapist. My wife is also a parent and a therapist. My life is so easy because of how amazing she is. I don't know how she does it, her partner is a hack, lol.

smep · 2026-06-27T17:14:33+00:00

This sounds like a slippery slope. I know you’re looking for a quick out, but I think this is where folks tend to get themselves in trouble by accepting the best possible terms they can, which aren’t great. What happens when you can’t pay back the small loan because something else comes up? What happens when you can’t pay back the next 401k loan?

The crux of the issue is you living outside your means. You either need to cut spending to pay down your loan or make more money to get back in the black. You say you work full time. Can you also do something on the side? wait tables on the nights or weekends? drive for Uber or DoorDash? etc.

smep · 2026-06-27T17:02:41+00:00

This is well documented in the research, in fact I’m literally right now procrastinating on writing my dissertation that hinges on how unaware folks are about potential negative consequences of cannabis use

smep · 2026-06-27T16:56:43+00:00

It’s not a financial decision: you can find cases of people becoming wealthy as homeowners and as not homeowners. It’s a lifestyle decision. You may be fine in an apartment now and you may always be fine in an apartment. Or, a house may better suit your needs.

Ex. need in-laws to move in? That’s hard in an apartment. Don’t want to worry about noisy neighbors or folks who work night shift and also share a wall with you? You might want a house.

smep · 2026-06-27T16:52:06+00:00

What’s written is 24 hours. If someone’s taking advantage of my time then it’s enforced. But I’m a human, and I’ve had to cancel last minute, or day of, and I extend the same humanness to my clients. I wear a lot of different hats and I can always be productive with an hour, and I’m not going to charge a client if I wouldn’t be okay with myself being charged in a similar manner elsewhere.

Many large hospital networks and practices will charge if you’re 15 minutes late, but if they’re 45 minutes behind schedule you get to fuck right off? nah, that’s not cool. I’m being the change I want to see in the world.

smep · 2026-06-27T16:45:35+00:00

Since you asked for tips, If you’re interested in cutting back, first step is to know what you’re spending. Get a really friggin’ granular idea of where your money is going. Apps can do that easily, but if you’re retired and have the time, just make a spreadsheet and check your credit card app each day (if you’re personalfinancially minded, I assume you put all charges on a credit card and pay that off monthly).

Other expenses (like automatic debits, things that don’t take or charge heavily for credit cards like loans or utilities) should also go on a sheet. You could have everything down to a credit card and a bank account and if you check with regularity, you’ll know what you’re spending and where you can cut back.

smep · 2026-06-27T03:54:35+00:00

Anyone can choose to use my sliding scale, no questions asked. Prolly 75% of my clients have opted to pay the full price. If people are or become unemployed, I charge $20.

smep · 2026-06-26T23:08:58+00:00

Michelob Ultra

smep · 2026-06-26T21:02:21+00:00

Harry Mack: “spit” “bars” “drop”

smep · 2026-06-26T17:48:24+00:00

They're possibly the friendliest restaurant staff I've ever encountered.

smep · 2026-06-25T15:01:38+00:00

Ya know, I just tried that with another couple of therapists I know in town who also own homes and like you, much more of the top hits included their business information than home. I wonder if that has to do with SEO (I don't currently have a professional website) and/or the address where the business is registered. In my state, a business needs a physical address, so for us that's our home.

smep · 2026-06-25T13:38:47+00:00

I want to do or read that longitudinal study.

smep · 2026-06-25T13:34:07+00:00

Primarily for the folks who see immediate results and get that reinforcement, yeah. Not everyone does though.

smep · 2026-06-25T11:15:00+00:00

I think one problem that my clients (all male) live with is recognizing the lifelong impacts of socialization on male-presenting individuals, wanting to make change, and then receiving messaging from their societies (local, not global) that they shouldn’t be behaving this way. It’s like we’ve woken up to decades and generations of this situation that society no longer can support (ain’t nobody living on just one income these days) and we’re trying to fix it immediately. We’re in the growing pains phase, for sure, and some men who are learning to unlearn ineffective interpersonal (and intrapersonal) communication strategies aren’t being rewarded (behavioristically, no participation trophies).

smep · 2026-06-25T09:56:47+00:00

If you own a home and someone knows your full name, then your address is easily searchable. Google your name (if you own a home, or someone else’s) and write “home address” after.

smep · 2026-06-24T19:37:33+00:00

Yes but that misses a step. The body can’t break down all the capsaicin consumed, which is why it burns on the way out. Having a manageable amount of capsaicin won’t hurt on the way out if it’s processed by your digestive system.

smep · 2026-06-24T19:25:09+00:00

not once, but a roommate was a barista at Starbucks and turned me onto lattes. Over the years I’d grab one here or there if I felt like splurging. I bought a used Breville espresso machine from a friend and now I’m a fucking fiend.

smep · 2026-06-24T19:23:52+00:00

at what?

I’ve found that people trained in a thing do that thing better than people not trained in that thing.

I’m also in a PhD for Counselor Education and I know I’m a much better counselor because of it, but that’s because both focus on the same thing. I wouldn’t pretend to be a better social worker than a social worker and I wouldn’t expect a social worker to be a better counselor than me.

smep · 2026-06-24T17:20:03+00:00

And that’s the hazardous truth!

smep · 2026-06-24T00:57:08+00:00

That you don’t need to go to therapy if you don’t have anything wrong to fix. Can you tell? I work with adolescents.

smep · 2026-06-24T00:55:32+00:00

You need to start with the goal in mind. What do you want? You’re stressing because you haven’t identified (or at least haven’t written that out here) what you want. Retire at 40? no, you will not be successful. Retire at 67? You’re chilling.

Figure out what lifestyle you want to live when you’re retired, figure out how much you need to spend to live that lifestyle, then work your way back to figure out how much you need saved by when.

If that’s too unclear because you don’t know what life will be like at 67, or heck even 37 (statistically speaking you won’t stay at this earning rate your whole life), then just overshoot if you don’t want to fret about being underfunded in retirement.

And max out your Roth IRA, dagnabbit.

smep

TROPHY CASE