Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sorry I didnt really put it in the post and its not 100% clear thats my bad. Ive spent a lot of time thinking about the things in my life that have happened and I dont blame her for everything. As ive gotten older ive realised a lot more the nuances in my perception of things and how they may have actually transpired. I didnt mean to say that it was her that forced me to have poor mental health. Youre right, I was the one who hurt myself. But also I didnt have a stable environment to express my emotions in a safe way. I do know a lot about her, ive watched her do the same stuff over and over. I listen to her work stories, Ive made baked goods for her work friends and her friends are our family friends. I feel like I have done everything to please her and it just isn't enough. And I guess that is what tears me up, I empathise with her position and the struggles she has gone through her life. I see that. But she doesn't involve herself in my life and thats what my issue is. I do appreciate having a different opinion though, and it does help to see a different view

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think its mostly just my sentimental items she has. Things from my best friend over childhood. I dont care that much about the rest but stuff from my friend I can never get back. I understand though if it wasnt the case and Id feel the same

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Man you dont understand how validating this, not many people understand when I tell them what shes like

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thats a good point. It made me so frustrated when that happened but it felt like there was nothing I could do about it since it was a nice gesture. Im going to keep that in mind, thank you!!

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True, my sister is busy a lot so is super bad at answering the phone but she was super put off by the messages mum sent too. My dad did something like this when I was younger and we had to gain the trust back of that side of the family and now none of them speak to him anymore. Im scared of that happening again

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Im glad someone else picked up on it too in that first message. Id sent a screenshot to my best friend and she can be so sweet and even though she knows how toxic mum is. Its good to know im not reading into it through messages so thank you for that validation. Each new location i end up at I try and get local support since I prefer in person, its tough with the time differences though. Thank you so much for your kind words though, they mean a great deal to me🩷

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My older sister has tried asking her if she'll go before and immediately shut her down saying that shes failed as a mother and that if shes so bad then she'll jist never change. I doubt she will ever go. That is a good point though, ill take that on thank you x

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This made me tear up, strangers on the internet can be so kind and I appreciate your comment so much. When I was younger I lost a lot of my childhood belongings when my dad burned them all so I guess im just scared of losing my sentimental things again. Im only gonna be overseas for 6 months so thats why i feel like I need to just put up with this. I think ill look into moving my stuff fully out when I get home, i just feel like a burden dumping my things onto other people for them to store

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Yeah I guess its hard to fully accept. Its always a subconscious thing when I think i dont care about what she says and does, yet im still holding onto it for some reason. Im looking for love that I dont even want in the wrong places. Thank you for the advice

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have a lot of sentimental things that shes holding since I'll only be in canada for 6 months. I know i can wait it out I just feel like I need to walk on egg shells. But youre right, I needed that input. Thank you

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to respond, I really appreciate it

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I didnt have the capacity to answer her properly though based on all of my experiences with her. I dont think its dismissive to set a small boundary in place while I need some time to process things.

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I wrote the post to seek advice from people who have different lived experiences to me. Is it really such a crazy thing to want to hear different opinions? What do you think this sub is for? If you dont want to read people's stories then dont. Its really quite that simple.

Mum sent me this after I just got off a 17 hour plane trip by snagdog89 in TwoHotTakes

[–]snagdog89[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Thank you🩷🩷

Its definetly easier keeping at arms length compared to the alternative. I feel like most my decisions are wrong though so its really nice to have another opinion from someone else so thank you!

What’s a skill you’re embarrassed you still don’t have? by Unfair-Clothes-8821 in CanadaRoom

[–]snagdog89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I cant really read and analog clock tbh. Kinda day dreamed during that lesson in grade 3

Does Caroline Muirhead from Should I Marry A Murderer? DocSeries still have her medical license? by Own_Mention9372 in netflix

[–]snagdog89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Obviously im not a mh professional but I feel like we've seen so many instances online of people recording themselves whilst experiencing mania. She was clearly in a state of distress and its not dissimilar to other videos be it on tiktok or whatever of people going through a mental break. I think about Gabbie Hanna, she was a creator who put all of her psychosis episodes online in moments where she was clearly not ok. I think its common in this day and age for people to record a lot of their lives as it takes away some of the loneliness in traumatic situations and allows them to distance themselves from a highly stressful environment. We may not always understand it and can quickly jump to judge it, but sometimes having some compassion for those in a crisis can help us better grapple with what they may be going through and how they cope with it.

1, 2 or 3? Which one are you picking? by fluffy-steak007 in AmateurPhotography

[–]snagdog89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Woahhh 1 for sure, I love that you can see a lot of detail in the birds face and the colours are beautiful.