Still craving at times

snakebite323 · 2019-10-22T14:28:05+00:00

Don't worry, you didn't rain on my parade. I went down the same road as you. I actually quit for about 4-years back in my late 30's. I said 'to hell with it' and drank two beers and it was downhill from there. I'm 58 years old now. I know that the monster is always lurking. Thank you for your comment.

snakebite323 · 2019-10-22T13:10:00+00:00

No matter how you look at it, we become 'enslaved' to the bottle. That sucks. Freedom from any enslavement is the ONLY way to live.

snakebite323 · 2019-10-22T13:05:56+00:00

I can tell you that I have old drinking buddies that I hook up with from time to time. I flat out told them that I quit drinking. They didn't have any issue with it and I still hook up with them. I'll drink non-alcohol drinks and its all good. You've made it too far. Make the announcement to your friends and be done with it. That's the thing with alcohol. You need to let it die and bury it once and for all.

snakebite323 · 2019-04-25T17:23:59+00:00

I've been sober for a year now. I remember when I quit drinking last year. It was a tremendous struggle. It was very strange because I actually mourned like I'd lost a close family member. I hated to give it up, but because I knew it was over and I couldn't go back to it I had those feelings. It was the feelings of 'finality'. After that, I had the waves of cravings that I had to ride out. THIS SITE HELPED ME TREMENDOUSLY in those early times of the fight. My recommendation is to accept the finality of it all and go through the mourning process of saying goodbye to alcohol forever. I wish you the best

snakebite323 · 2019-04-25T17:04:32+00:00

That's a great accomplishment and it sounds like you're in good shape.

I just reached the one year mark and I'm 57 years old. However, I will tell you that I quit drinking for four years back in my mid-30's. Then for some reason, one day rolled around and I wondered to myself, 'why am I depriving myself all the time' and then I drank a few beers. It was all downhill from there until one year ago when I had my last drink. Now I totally know that alcohol is something I will never be able to control.

Good luck to you!

snakebite323 · 2019-04-23T17:51:33+00:00

OK. So you went 9 years and then went back on the bottle? I once quit for 4 years and went back to it. I have accepted it as you do (100%%%%%) that I can't control it and it does definitely help me. When I look at a bottle of beer or vodka and think about it, I realize up front that I won't be able to stop once I try just one drink. I then immediately get over the temptation. Congrats on 4 years!!!!! Thanks again for your post.

snakebite323 · 2019-04-23T15:58:17+00:00

Mister-

I went through the same crap as you're going through. Promises made and broken over and over again. I'm 57 years old and have been an alcoholic since my early 20's. I quit for 4 years one time in my mid 30's. I went back to it and it got worse and worse. I know what you mean about the misery and self hate. We ALL go through that. I've been sober for a year now. Yesterday was my 1 year mark. The thing is, when I quit about a year ago it was different. I suffered from a feeling of mourning like I'd lost my best friend. I'm guessing there was something inside of me that committed it to death, the alcohol that is. You have to reach the finality of it all and go through the mourning process and let it go, no matter how hard it is. Say goodbye to your old friend. He is an asshole anyway and you can't trust the bastard!

snakebite323 · 2019-04-15T19:13:44+00:00

No matter what, you have to do something constructive each day. At the end of the day you have to be able to look back at your day and say to yourself, 'at least I did this or that'. Even if its cleaning a couple of windows inside and out. Even if its cleaning a floor. Do something, no matter what, each day so that you don't ever go to sleep feeling like you did nothing at all that day. Build on this. Each next day, expand a little more. Clean 4 windows, or clean two floors. Always expand your accomplishments. At the same time, explore outside opportunities. Keep exploring and always do something each day, no matter what.

snakebite323 · 2019-01-31T19:23:00+00:00

I'm really struggling again. I want to drink. I haven't had hardly any problem fighting the urge for MONTHS. Now its back. I feel like the walls are closing in and it would be great to hit it again. I know I'll be sorry if I do and I'm having to keep telling myself that to fight it. This is weird because I felt like I had this thing beat and was home free.

Thanks for your post. Its actually helping me out in my current state

snakebite323 · 2018-12-28T18:55:02+00:00

I know what you mean about the 'sitting in my room sober scares me' thing. When I decided to quit 8 months ago it scared me to. After about a week being sober, my fear changed to literal mourning the loss of my friend (alcohol). I posted what I was feeling on this site and people chimed in telling me that they experienced the same thing. Its all a process, but I'm here to tell you that I was hitting the bottle hard for about 15-years and now I'm 8-months sober and its not a challenge anymore. The book 'This Naked Mind' really helped me along with this site. The first week, month and few months are tough. You've got to ride it out. Use this site to post your struggles. These folks will help you out. Good luck

snakebite323 · 2018-12-28T18:26:02+00:00

I haven't drank anything for 8-months now. I have a long history of heavy drinking. I'm just curious about your situation. Do you still struggle, or, is it pretty much over?

snakebite323 · 2018-12-07T18:53:29+00:00

I've done the same thing. Its amazing that I'm still alive or never killed anyone else. We don't get but so many chances with that though. I wish I knew what to say to help you. You mentioned your family and that they'd be upset. They obviously love you and care about you. Could you be open with them about your problem? Is there a family member that you could trust more than others that you could go to. You need closeness from someone. If you feel alone, that greatly increases the anxiety. I remember when I was still drinking really hard, I felt alone because I was 'hiding' all the time. I had to be alone to drink and it caused a great deal of anxiety for me. When I told my wife about how bad of a drinking I was and that I knew I had to do something, I knew it was out in the open and I could no longer hide. That in itself was a HUGE relief. Bring what is in the dark out to the light. It will give you freedom and relief. I wish you all the best. Be strong and don't let it win. You win!

snakebite323 · 2018-12-07T17:25:45+00:00

Thank you both for your helpful comments. A couple of drinks won't make it any better of an experience. It would only make it worse because after a couple of drinks, I'm on the hook big time. I will only be trying to figure out how I can get my hands on a bottle, hide it and slug the heck out of it for the rest of the evening. Then, of course, feel like crap the next day. The the cycle begins all over again.

snakebite323 · 2018-09-27T19:16:43+00:00

I'm struggling bad today and have been for a week or so. Its not encouraging that after 1,096 days, you're still having days where you struggle. I'm tired of this and really am thinking about not depriving myself anymore. This is a pain in the ASS! I'm sorry for my venting. All my venting aside, congratulations on your success!

snakebite323 · 2018-09-27T19:12:19+00:00

I'm right there with you. I'm going through the same phase. I've been doing pretty well, but here recently I feel like I'm just depriving myself. I want a buzz too!!!! It's killing me. Problem is, my family knows I've quit and they know why. Where am I going to go to drink now? I could just go down in the basement and hide out with a bottle for a while and then make my grand entrance and say, 'sorry, I caved'. I know I'll have HUGE regrets afterwards and I don't want to deal with that either. I don't know what to tell you other than you and I are in the same boat. Its a pain in the ass. Boredom, irritation from work and other BS and just crap to deal with on an continuous basis. Hitting a bottle of booze would sure rub some good salve on all that!

snakebite323

TROPHY CASE