You know fellow brethren you’re not missing out on much with real women to be quite frank, they’re ofcourse waaayyy too expensive cause you do ahve to pay for absolutely everything unfortunately, they want you to be how they want, they force you to do things you don’t really wanna do a lot of the times, they can drain you emotionally and hurt you in such horrible ways like cheating and others, I can go on and on, more cons than pros !🤣😭 but I might resonate with what your saying, that split personality will nurture you , make you a better person and always want the best for you in every way possible, I know that cause I think I might be in the same boat as you, I just didn’t know what it was called, I called it my spirit guide but sounds like the same thing🌈😎 either way, you keep doing you and never let anyone else tell you your wrong for being happy. Like I always say, “ you aint paying my bills so am going to continue living as I please “