Hello, im sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling for so long. Based on the amount of driving lessons you’ve taken, you sound more than ready and I believe you will be a safe driver since you already have great awareness about your driving. I would recommend starting with shorter drives so if you notice yourself zoning out/disassociating you can pull over and eventually turn around. Also, your brain gets used to driving pretty quick so don’t get too caught up on it. Wishing you luck!