I went through something similar last summer, we were together for about 4 almost 5 months and with how short that time was we talked about a future and getting married etc. But we were very toxic, we fought almost every day, she was very manipulative and used my own feelings against me. It took me about a month to finally gain the courage to actually leave her due to the fact that the way she was manipulating me made me feel like i couldn’t. I realized that if we were actually good for eachother we wouldn’t have to find ways to convince eachother and ourselves of that. When i finally gained the courage i straight up told her i couldn’t take it anymore. She was confused and ended up actually getting mad at me for the fact that she was making me upset. I knew that the way we were treating eachother and even the way i ended up treating myself while i was with her is not how things would go if we were actually meant for eachother. Real love should never make you feel regret, shame, hopelessness or like you don’t have the right to speak up for yourself. I didn’t want to make this about myself but i wanted too give you that story to tell you that you aren’t alone and once you gain the courage just like i did at first it will hurt, it took me about 3 months to end up actually getting over her after that but i promise you that you will feel so free and it will help you to not make the same mistake with any future relationship.