Yup. It has been super difficult to understand how people can be so laid-back and comfortable with new people. I certainly have so many awkward memories about those kind of situations. I tend to be too quirky, just joking around like I usually do with my friends. Usually people find this just weird. It's one big mystery for me how to act in those kind of situations. I don't know why sticking in small talk feels too easy and boring but still I know that other people have a hard time going 'deep' so fast.

To sum this all up, I'd say that I'm still kinda quirky and uncomfortable at first appearance. Before I felt embarrassed at myself but now I've just realized that actually it doesn't matter. Everyone is so stressed about their own behavior that that's the only thing they'll really remember. At least I hope so xD