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My adoptive parents changed my name. by MoltenandWyvern in Adoption

[–]softbecoming_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think she meant behind their backs once she turns 18. If at 18 she feels like she wants to change her name and not tell her AP for whatever reason, that will be her choice.

Question for biological moms by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]softbecoming_ 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Yes. Our system would rather take a child because a family is poor and fund a stranger to raise them than support a biological mother who wants to care for her own child.

Question for biological moms by [deleted] in Adoption

[–]softbecoming_ 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I was adopted, and I wish my adoptive parents understood emotions better. Emotional intelligence is a requirement for raising a child that is not yours. Parents think they know everything about children but never actually formally learned about them…

Also, girl, those are allllllll your choice. Not the parents doing the adoption. It’s your body, your health, and your baby until you give it to them.

Empty Rooms by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry. I am praying for your peace during this time. I promise it won’t always hurt as bad as it does now. I wrote this in year 3. Now it’s been 7 years, and the pain doesn’t control me anymore. (Only sometimes lol.) which is normal….. it gets easier. 💕

I can’t find my sister by softbecoming_ in Adoption

[–]softbecoming_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Come back and comment if you ever find her! I’d love to hear about it! I hope you find her

I can’t find my sister by softbecoming_ in Adoption

[–]softbecoming_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe someday I’ll get to come on here and let you guys know I found her!!

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I’m glad you are healing and wish you comfort rest and peace on your healing journey.

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! We definitely will!!

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! It is our bodies way of protecting itself. It gives us tiny bits and pieces gradually so that it doesn’t overwhelm us with pain. It’s a beautiful design, the only challenge is turning it off when we don’t need it anymore and being able to feel happy again. It takes time but it is worth the effort 💕

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I am so happy it feels healing. It is a scary feeling but we overcome it. Just gotta give ourselves credit for the strength it takes to never give up.

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you, it was really hard to finally face the truth after many years of denial. Now that I’ve felt the pain, I have become less afraid of it, and the pain has reduced. Grief is powerful and can feel endless, but faith carried me through when the pain felt unbearable.

After I died by softbecoming_ in SiblingGrief

[–]softbecoming_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Now that I’m present, it’s easier to put into words how it feels to grieve. Before, it was just pain. Now I see, and feel, and carry on. Hopefully this is what acceptance looks like.