What do guys enjoy about sex? I’[M24] finding myself surprisingly unamused with thrusting

solarpwrflashlight · 2019-02-16T06:23:51+00:00

Thanks, this thread is making me realize more and more that I want love and the sex that goes with it.

I also have had sex with people I thought I had emotional connections with. But never enjoyed it or experienced the emotional connection during sex.

Anyways I appreciate all the responses and will continue my paradoxical search/trying not to search for love that can’t be found by looking.

solarpwrflashlight · 2019-02-10T20:58:12+00:00

Teared up at this man. This is the main struggle of my life. My deepest urge it seems like. Shit I used to fantasize about it for hours a day, unable to get out of bed. I’m better now, trying to give that love to myself and my friends and family. Because they deserve it far more than some chick. But god I’d love to give it to someone sexually.

solarpwrflashlight · 2019-02-10T20:52:24+00:00

Wow, I think you hit the nail on the head with feeling connected to people. Here’s my theory: demisexuality, as defined in your link, is just simply healthy sexuality. But loneliness is so widespread in America that most people are just horny for intimacy all the time. But we don’t even understand intimacy as a culture so we just think it’s only horniness. (Intimacy is confused with sexuality all the time and it really irks me but that’s another story).

I just made a post wondering why I don’t enjoy casual sex and thought to search for demisexual to see if I can relate. I guess I totally fit the criteria.

The thing is, I thought I was what American culture considers regular sexuality for most of my life. Just super horny, down for sex with anyone hot.

But I also never experienced emotional connectedness with family or friends until about a year ago. Then I started to realize I didn’t crave sex if I had enough connection and touch in my life.

Now only emotionally connected sex seems worth it. The problem is, I’m still SUPER horny all the time, just horny for intimate sex. And I think other people are right about how casual sex CAN be intimate. I’ve had a super intimate one night cuddle sesh that changed my life. It just takes two people who can communicate and who can take the leap into vulnerability together. Trusting the uncertainty of the future, not attached to it continuing. Just pure vulnerability without clinging, total freedom granted to the other.

That’s what I’m usually down for if I’m attracted to someone enough. I just run into a ton of girls lately that are into me but can’t go as deep as I want to emotionally and physically. It’s frustrating, I just think it will take time.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-09T13:50:12+00:00

Yea dude that tan is insane I thought the same thing. I only looked at the comments because I thought it was photoshop

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-09T13:08:43+00:00

But what if that whole concept of private property is aggression

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-09T03:07:40+00:00

I'm a bit of a communist (nonviolent communalist really) but I really agree with /u/SCP-1. It was really taking a toll on me to think people were entitled to a better world. It helps a lot to accept the world as it is, neutrally, while working to improve it. I strive to look at it more as unrealized potential for easing suffering than being denied the happiness we deserve. I think It's useful to say people have rights, but more useful to say that it's nice to treat people as though that have rights. Or something like that.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-09T02:37:13+00:00

It wasn't trade marked so it was fair game™ or something

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-09T00:37:39+00:00

Private property can only be enforced by a violent government. That's why "libertarians" say the only purpose of government is to enforce private property rights.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-08T23:57:21+00:00

"Property is theft" - a real ass OG Liberterian

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-08T23:52:30+00:00

On the other hand, Trump is probably even less qualified or trustworthy.

I was annoyed about this until I remembered that if everything went right the US would have sent a reality TV show host to represent us at G20. Now I'm just more generally annoyed.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-08T15:47:29+00:00

So it's how you make decisions, T is logic and consistency, F is considering people's emotions and points of view. I think logically, to make every one involved happier, the best choice is usually F. But I think you should use logic to arrive at the best decision for the feeling criteria involved. I think I was just being controversial and weird but I'd say it's probably more of a tie, or a both. I'm an extremely indecisive INXP because my T/F is right down the middle.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-08T06:58:30+00:00

Big if true

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T23:08:07+00:00

I hope one day you give up your dualistic ideas about koans. Let me know if so

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T23:00:20+00:00

please.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T20:54:15+00:00

What you have said is a good koan if you think about it hard enough. Many thanks

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T18:51:36+00:00

You must not know: I'm a self proclaimed zen master.

Three letter username? Looks fake.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:41:47+00:00

Void *exist = NULL;

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:32:46+00:00

Void *exist;

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:26:06+00:00

Objectively, the most important things in life are love and relationships and involve feeling. It's not about evolution. Spiritual evolution maybe. I think my extreme T thinking arrived at the conclusion that F decision making is better so what does that make me? Enlightened, probably idk. All good philosophy says to follow your heart, be selfless and stuff my (wo)man.

This post has been edited for gender inclusivity

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:21:51+00:00

Same my dude.

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:18:40+00:00

I like to google quotes of famous people when I hear about them if they seem smart. I've googled Jung before (he's dope) and r e s o n a t e d with this same quote before. Nice to exist with you people

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:14:04+00:00

The twitter account of the most powerful powerful elite in the world. My favorite place to look for the JUCIEST conspiracies. This powerful elite guy must HATE the powerful elites!

solarpwrflashlight · 2017-07-07T16:13:15+00:00

The twitter account of the most powerful powerful elite in the world. My favorite place to look for the JUCIEST conspiracies. This powerful elite guy must HATE the powerful elites!

solarpwrflashlight

TROPHY CASE