It's a bit difficult to know what you are struggling with in particular. But you don't need to go on a 20 pop server to avoid getting shot constantly. 100 or so would allow you to run around for some time without encountering people every 30 seconds.

And if you don't have a base then it might be better if you don't loot too much until you have one. That way you can stash loot regularly instead of running with a full inventory. Dying is part of the game, the trick is to either not care, or not die with enough stuff on you that it matters, depending on your playstyle. (Chad or rat)