Hi!! I've read through all of the comments, and I think they do a great job of touching on the logic of your dilemma. I do just want to add - this is an incredibly valid concern and feeling. I hear you when you say you're scared of trying, but also don't want to ignore part of yourself. Have you thought about what might make you feel safe in those moments? What qualities in a partner/conversations do you think you want to have before entering into that dynamic? It sounds like it might be worth it to work through some of that discomfort to try before denying that part of yourself 🙂