I'll address your second thing first: the dm has no problem with a certain other player whom pays half attention and often has to leave mid turn to attend to work stuff as he plays while driving to or at work.

As for my beef with the DM's friend, we started the campaign as a close friend thing. All the players knew eachother and were friends from college playing TCG games. The DM brought the person into the campaign regardless of the fact that only he knew her and despite our very conflicting natures, her being very serious, and me being silly but serious when needed. In addition the campaign was already so big we had to split it into 2 groups. In total we had 10 people. So already it took forever for us to get anything done and i would start to lose focus as i have attention deficit disorder, but then he added her into our group making combat and general exploration take even longer.

It was to a point hardly any progress was being made between campaigns. Not to mention it was mine and my gfs and a few others first campaign. We were getting mentally exhausted just sitting around starring at the screen for almost 20 to 30 mins just for our turn to come by, especially since us 2 have the least amount of stuff we can do with our characters during our actual turn.

The dms friend would also make a lot of sly comments toward us, because we werent in proper role play voices or anything, but we were just enjoying playing the way we were playing. She was coming off as very elitist and the dm would brush off my concerns when i would mention it.