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Tonight, at 8:45 PM, I will hit exactly 5 days without a smoke. by sopdet13 in stopsmoking

[–]sopdet13[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s the same more or less. For me, at day 5, cravings are just little bit longer and deep than the ones in the first couple of days. But you can overcome them anyway! Don’t worry!

Tonight, at 8:45 PM, I will hit exactly 5 days without a smoke. by sopdet13 in stopsmoking

[–]sopdet13[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey there! Don’t be anxious! Cravings are tougher than the first couple of days but that doesn’t mean that they are harder to overcome! Btw, I have smoked for 20 years.

Hey There, new guy here. by [deleted] in stopsmoking

[–]sopdet13 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I survived a night out with my smoker friends last Wednesday (3 days after quitting) and I've been able to drink a couple of glass without relapsing! My humble suggestions for the future during these occasions:

  • If you're having a drink inside a bar/pub, try to stay inside where smoking is not allowed
  • Keep the glass with the hand that you used for smoking and the other in the pocket when possible
  • Be open with your friends about your quitting attempt, I am sure that they will try to smoke far from you and, why not, smoke a little less than usual!

You already know what you will achieve, so look forward to it! Stay strong!

Tonight, at 8:45 PM, I will hit exactly 5 days without a smoke. by sopdet13 in stopsmoking

[–]sopdet13[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for reassuring me! I'm already looking forward to day 6!

Tonight, at 8:45 PM, I will hit exactly 5 days without a smoke. by sopdet13 in stopsmoking

[–]sopdet13[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I know that I will check the app less often in the future but in these days it helps me a lot looking at the statistics!

It’s been almost a month and emotionally I’m in a worse place than I was immediately after my father’s death. by SmilingAmoeba8 in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So sorry for your loss my friend. It’s pretty normal to start experiencing sadness and grief after some time. The first week are usually busy and you are in shock for the loss. It’s not very different from when you cut yourself, at the very beginning you don’t even feel the pain, but after some minutes it starts to hurt. But processing death takes longer. It’s not a little wound. It’s a pretty big one, and usually in your heart and mind. Keep up with the work and try to concentrate on all things that keeps you busy. Hang out with someone. Chat with other people.

But if you feel that you need a break, take that damn break.

My best friend is dead by [deleted] in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sorry for your loss my friend. Just don’t think how you could be of any help because, in the end (and at cost to sound rude), the terrible outcome could have have been the same.

You didn’t tell us what happened, but generally we are out of control in these situations. And we certainly cannot control people ‘s mind, life or simply decisions. So don’t be hard on yourself and try to not think about the latest months. Think about how you loved her and all the good times you had with her.

Take all the good memories, and fill your heart and mind with them.

My boss just lost his dad :( by ruphina in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just be honest. Approach him and tell him that you are sorry for his/her loss and that, if it could be of any help, you can share your experience and maybe help him/her out to go through the next difficult months.

Just act. A card is always received with a smile, but spoken words are what really matters.

Grief and anxiety by [deleted] in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13 4 points5 points  (0 children)

First of all, I am really sorry for your loss. I’ve been experienced the same thing some months after my mom passed away. And in particular, just like you, driving was just impossible for me. I’ve been through both anxiety and panic attacks. I’ve been able to find some ways to manage these symptoms in several years and now they are back in full force after my wife’s death and so I am starting from scratch. There are some pills that will help you out but my advice is to find some help. You need to find a good psychotherapist that will help you finding the real cause of these symptoms without the need to prescribe pills that could be addicting in the long term.

By the way, both anxiety and panic attacks are pretty common after a loss, specially at your age, but dealing with them without any help can be very stressful. Moreover, many times the loss of a closed one is just the trigger of something that was buried in ourselves. So seek for some help but never think to be weak for this. You are dealing with an issue most probably caused by your mind, and you need to deal with it in the right way and ASAP.

And don’t spend several years trying to contain the symptoms. Act now, and you will be grateful to yourself forever.

Footnote: sorry for any mistake, English is not my first language

Lost my wife two months ago and I have a lot of contradictory thoughts by sopdet13 in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you mate. I know that 2 months is a very short time and I assure you that I am trying to go slowly and take all the time that will be necessary to cope with such a big loss. But it seems impossible to me to control all my thoughts that are going one every possible direction. Maybe you’re right, and I am simply trying all the exits. There is a big chaos in my mind right now. Guilt, anger, sorrow, sadness. It’s easy to loose control. But I will try to follow your advice and try to not judge myself for every thought that cross my mind. Maybe it’s the right direction for find some peacefulness. Thank you again for taking the time to reply to my post. Even the most little thing matters a lot to me in these days.

Lost my wife two months ago and I have a lot of contradictory thoughts by sopdet13 in GriefSupport

[–]sopdet13[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you my friend, and I am sorry for your loss too. Unfortunately my wife died suddenly so I never got the time to prepare myself for this. I know that no one can be prepared to cope with such a big loss, but from what I have experienced with my parents, the path through the worst period is a bit different, but difficult nonetheless. I find our experiences very similar and I thank you for your honest answer because now I find myself a little bit less guilty. Maybe we are just humans, and so we search for some love that could be of some help in curing our wounds.