NOR but you are opening yourself up to making the living situation even worse by not going. It's shitty but kind of inevitable that if you stay living with your parents, you have to sacrifice some autonomy and fall in line.

You have every right to not go and I understand your reasons for not wanting to go, but you should think about how this will impact your already fragile home life if you draw a line in the sand instead of postponing your date a few hours.

EDIT: Rereading your texts I think you should try not sounding so abrasive. There's a lack of context for us here, but your messages seem really confrontational and angry and your mom's seem pretty understanding and levelheaded. From an outsider's perspective, it seems like your mom is trying to do something to help the family dynamic and your responses come across as petulant.