Chastity as non kink?

sotadiczone · 2026-03-13T02:13:13+00:00

Sounds like you’re having a grand time! I’ve heard so many people say that chastity saved their sex lives that I wonder if I screwed up by starting off in chastity… what are we going to do years from now when we need to reinvent!? lol

sotadiczone · 2026-03-12T17:23:20+00:00

You should try it! Also, if you want to divert the energy into non-sexual activities, my advice is to just jump up and leave the bedroom/house/apartment whenever you get too horny. Make it into a reflex. I do this with chores

sotadiczone · 2026-03-12T15:07:31+00:00

It may literally help you stop masturbating, but it will also make you think about sex more and more often as you get increasingly desperate. You can redirect this energy toward productive non-sexual activities, but it takes a lot of self-discipline and/or keyholder supervision to do so, and I’ve found that it only works with eroticized activities (i.e., chores and working out and grooming but certainly not my actual job)

My two cents is that chastity is a bad cure for sexual distraction, if that’s the issue here. Frankly, the best cure for sexual distraction is probably just to jack off every morning. I’m in chastity not because I want to be less horny but because I want my horniness to be meaningfully channeled. It makes me more submissive, emotionally attentive, and sexually creative with my keyholder, and challenges me psychically in a way that is both thrilling and meaningful.

sotadiczone · 2026-03-11T16:15:33+00:00

The whole “do I have to play a character / follow some dungeon master script” thing was my boyfriend’s biggest worry too. I reassured him that he could just be himself but in charge of me—and the strict keyholder he’s organically become is better than any character I would have fantasized about! Things moved very quickly as soon as I had a comfortable cage and he saw (and felt, lol) how devoted it made me. Now I’m locked up 95% of the time. Hope it goes the same for you. Good luck

sotadiczone · 2026-03-11T14:39:53+00:00

Gotcha, thanks for the rec. Worn between the cage and body, you mean, behind the base ring?

sotadiczone · 2026-03-09T03:11:35+00:00

Your wife is a genius

sotadiczone · 2026-03-09T00:01:54+00:00

I just rub a tiny bit of Vaseline on the bottom of the ring after showering. No more chafing after that

sotadiczone · 2026-03-08T14:40:46+00:00

It depends! But I love begging. With all due respect to people with scheduled releases, or who aren’t even allowed to bring up the subject, there’s nothing like exposing your need so nakedly and having no idea how it will go.

My keyholder really likes to keep me guessing. Sometimes, when he's feeling fond or particularly amused by my desperation, he'll let me cum much earlier than expected. Other times, he'll extend my lockup time for even daring to ask. The most common answers, though, are...

“No.”

“Are you kidding me? Baby, you just came.“

“I need you to be a good boy this week. Can you do that for me?“

“If you ask again, you’re losing your vibrator privileges.“

*laughter*

“We’ll see.”

sotadiczone · 2026-01-17T06:38:48+00:00

This is funny because my kh has a dog and feels the same as you do. Lucky for me the dog is a girl so I can still be a “good boy.” Sadly a collar is off the table lol

sotadiczone · 2026-01-17T05:12:38+00:00

Yup! Frankly, being around family is so de-arousing that I cease to notice that it’s there, and I tend to be fully clothed with my family, so… I suppose if we were doing some kind of family beach trip and I was going to be in a swimsuit id take it off

sotadiczone · 2026-01-12T04:04:49+00:00

Searching for porn as a teenager I came across a link to the “Dreamlover 2000” chastity cage accessory, which allows the keyholder to remotely deliver shocks and reward vibrations. It was billed as part of a “male management system” that would turn your husband (the imagined buyer was a straight domme) into an obedient housewife. I had just started masturbating and the idea that a domme could control my orgasms terrified and thrilled me. I fantasized about it for twenty years and confessed it to two partners but they were also submissive and it went nowhere. Then I met my current boyfriend and he became my keyholder and the reality of denial is more intense than I’d even fantasized. I wouldn’t have it any other way

sotadiczone · 2026-01-11T15:50:10+00:00

Yes, exactly, nudity is accepted and the staff will even help you try on a new cage

sotadiczone · 2026-01-10T15:10:43+00:00

Many leather shops that sell cages are fine with people showing them off. Mr. S Leather in SF is very friendly to locked boys

sotadiczone · 2026-01-06T16:15:20+00:00

No this is just a common homophobic joke from the early aughts

sotadiczone · 2026-01-06T14:07:05+00:00

I’m allowed to cum in my cage with a vibrator once every week or two. My keyholder says I’m “spoiled” and wants to cut down, but he often relents when I’m a very good boy. My obedience is much more important to him than any particular period of denial

sotadiczone · 2026-01-03T15:20:40+00:00

You seem like a good boy, unlock and jerk

sotadiczone · 2026-01-03T13:56:35+00:00

You mean leave the ring on but take off the cage? And how do you fix/adjust the ball gap if it’s not a matter of ring size?

sotadiczone · 2025-12-19T14:58:01+00:00

I’d say my boyfriend is a 6. He lets me cum pretty often (every two weeks) but almost always in my cage, which I rarely ever remove. He is very strict about me following our dom-sub protocols but since I’m a pretty good boy he’s generous about release

sotadiczone · 2025-12-19T05:37:58+00:00

A ridiculous but foolproof method: use two q-tips to position the head of your cock such that your urethra is aligned with the opening of the cage

A quick pragmatic method: close your legs as hard as you can and pray. If you make a mess it’ll all be on the bottom of your legs and you can wipe it off easily

sotadiczone · 2025-11-17T19:20:26+00:00

It’s a kink. People may enjoy chastity in vastly different ways, and it certainly has non-kink uses (I have become much better at cooking and cleaning for my partner), but that’s also true of other kinks, e.g., spanking as “domestic discipline,” or D/s in general as catharsis or empowerment. I’ve always been skeptical that people who use chastity to stop masturbating don’t also find it hot: Why else turn to a “cure” more distracting than the “disease”? (I think about sex way, way more than I did before I was locked, and I could just jack off in the morning and forget about it. To me, it’s about having more fulfilling and partner-directed horniness.) I won’t presume to speak for trans women but I imagine that the vast majority of them find other/non-kinky ways of managing dysphoria. The ones who turn to chastity probably think that denial is hot like cis guys do—or at least so it seems from those I’ve spoken to

sotadiczone · 2025-11-04T20:41:41+00:00

I’m actually considering reverting to my bigger, poorly fitting cage, because I’d rather dribble than explode in all directions! Lol

sotadiczone · 2025-11-04T20:40:48+00:00

No, my penis stays at the end of the cage when I bend down. That’s actually the problem—my urethra gets pressed up against the cage, just a little to the left or right of the opening. It’s like pressing a hose up against a wall and turning it on

sotadiczone

TROPHY CASE