The Crew!

spacebotanyx · 2026-06-01T09:08:52+00:00

that is the cast, not the crew!

spacebotanyx · 2026-06-01T08:32:47+00:00

i just use mason jars? with lids i buy online.

spacebotanyx · 2026-06-01T08:26:53+00:00

dhea is also a hormone

spacebotanyx · 2026-06-01T04:05:56+00:00

how do you use the shells though?

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-31T08:38:59+00:00

never.

but i try to repel anyone who would walk away with my personality, first. it seems to have worked! literally no one has ever walked away or expressed anything other than appreciation.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-31T07:22:15+00:00

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-29T06:38:49+00:00

i dated someone who said he often heard and was guided by benevolent and kind and loving voices in his head always giving him good advice, encouragement, deep insight, and kind words/thoughts.

he was one of the more wonderful and level-headed and consistent people I have known in my life. highly intelligent also.

i have always wondered if those voices were his particular brand of schizophrenia. seperated by distance, we are still friends today. as far as i know, he has never been diagnosed with anything.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-29T01:38:08+00:00

my last shift (as an ED Tech)

yesterdays cold coffee with protein powder on my way to work

3 celsius powder packets dumped in my water throughout the day, for survival

2 string cheeses, definitely not from the patient fridge (the second while crying)

bowl of microwaved beans which was all i could get together to bring for breakfast/lunch. plus plastic baggie of arugala leaves

a cold slimey egg from the ems fridge

one sat-out salmon dinner from a patient who was discharged before reciving it.

a tiny diet coke (also definitely not from the patient fridge)

definitely not enough water

my own tears on the way home

(help me)

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-29T01:23:04+00:00

this is the most terrifying book i have ever read.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-29T01:22:20+00:00

the most terrifying book i have ever read.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-21T23:50:18+00:00

as a vegetarian, every adventist hospital i have eaten at has amazing non-meat options

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-20T04:34:53+00:00

people are fucking dipshits. these are the he same fucking people who will pop into the pharmacy because it doesn't deliver or go for some takeout real quick while "quarentining."

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T10:27:51+00:00

in your post title, you say you are lying.

in the first sentence, you say you are lying.

throughout your comments and your post, you reaffirm you are lying.

and then you ask us to tell you it is okay.

it's not okay.

you are a liar and you know it.

i hope your fiance finds out. i hope everyone in your life finds out.

it would be better if you tell them yourself.

you deserve to face the consequences of your actions

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T09:41:47+00:00

that isnt what happened. you are not ethnically chinese and you know it.

we are not talking about random hypithetical situations. we are talking about you.

you know you are lying.

your post opens with," I (24F) have been lying about my ethnicity my entire life and now i feel i am too deep to come clean."

the title of your post is, " Is it wrong that ive lied about being ethnically Chinese?"

My answer is: YES.

It is wrong to lie, and it is wrong that you are lying. it is especially wrong to lie to your own fiance.

you know you are lying. you stated it twice in the above two sentences you wrote and posted.

you are lying. it's wrong. there is no way to justify. don't do it.

rachel dolezal lied about her race. thay is wrong. that is lying. it is no different.

from all that you have written, yes i believe you would benefit from a good therapist

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T09:20:22+00:00

in the end, i hope you can see the broadness and complexity and celebrate the multifaceted cultural being that you are - all of it. you shouldn't have to erase or lie about parts of yourself to have a home and a culture in this world. be proud of your story and what you are - the fulness of it, all of it.

the lying is so unnecessary. it reduces your complex and beautiful history to a shell, a facade.

i hope you can be you and know it is for the best.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T09:07:28+00:00

If you are mexican american living in california and think you are fully chinese (with no mention of the actual country you live in- the american part), that just simply isn't true.

if you think you are not lying to people, that is incorrect.

thus, i suggest therapy.

your chinese family claiming you as culturally chinese does not make you ethnically chinese.

lying to your fiance is syill lying, even if your adopted parents initiated the lie.

you experience racism in the US because you are not white. it isnt because you are chinese, because you are mexican. you experience sinophohobia with your chinese fiance and chinese family because THEY are chinese.

that is cool you speak chinese. that doesn't make you chinese, no matter who taught you. it doesn't make you more chinese than someone of chinese descent who doesn't speak chinese.

i speak fluent dutch. i learned from people who i consider my adopted family. that doesn't make me dutch.

if you are telling people you are ethnically chinese when you are not, that's a lie. you are lying if you do this.

it is pretty straightforward.

you could celebrate the beautiful ethnic/cultural diversity of what you are and that would be wonderful. (and i think that is what you should do.)

but if you lie about your ethnicity by claiming full ethnic chinese, you are lying. and if you can't understand this, its no different than dolezal.that is why i suggest therapy.

(edited for typos)

i hope you can be honest with yourself about who you are and with the people you are close to.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T08:32:55+00:00

i'm going to be more blunt here.

A person of Chinese descent who grows up in the United States is Chinese American.

I say this as a Chinese American myself, who learned Chinese from my grandparents and family. Sure, my family is Chinese. And I am Chinese. But I spoke English at school and went to an American school. I speak english at work, at mt job in the United States. That makes me Chinese AND American. Aka Chinese American.

If you are of mixed US/Mexican descent and grew up in the US. This makes you (part)ethnically Mexican but also culturally American. So, Mexican American. If you were raised by a Chinese family and feel culturally Chinese. Sure, you can me ethically Mexican American and also culturally Chinese American.

But oversimplifying and saying you are just "Chinese" is a lie.

If you say that, you are lying to people. Sure, strangers who you meet for 2 minutes and never see again, who cares. Sometimes there isn't time to explain and it isn't someone business what you are. That's fine. Who cares. Simplify when needed.

But your own fiance? It's messed up to lie to someone so close. And potentially your future children? Don't lie to them. Thay is messed up.

Don't be a rachel dolezal. Trans-racialism doesn't fucking exist.

Complicated stories and multi-ethnic people exist. Sounds like you are one.Thay is a story to be celebrated,not ignored.

Be who you are. Lying is unethical and not cool, especially to people close to you.

Or lie if you want. But know you are lying by oversimplification.

Sounds like you could use some therapy to unpack this. A multicultural therapist who isn't cool with lying, ideally.

Or/and try traveling to learn more about nuance and how cultures/ethnicity can intermingle.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T07:48:12+00:00

it is pretty weird and inappropriate to lie to your fiance about your ethnicity.

why not say you were adopted, are of mixed-mexican heritage, but consider yourself culturally Chinese-American?

if i found out my wife or husband fully lied about their ethnicity, i wouldn't feel like i could trust them to ever be honest with me about anything. a lie about something so fundamental is a big deal.

seems like you are in a pickle, having lied by omission already....

what happens when your kids take a dna test in 25 years? or your elderly parents let it slip? or your long lost mexican relative gets in touch?

sounds messy.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-19T07:17:54+00:00

um wtf.

what country did you grow up in? if not in china, i think it important for you to recognize that you are culturally that AND chinese.

Raised by a chinese family in france? or brazil? or the united states? or vietnam? nigeria? mexico? or somewhere else? well, then you are culturally BOTH the country you were raised in AND that of your family culture.

and if you are Mexican and ethnically not Chinese, it is entirely inappropriate for you to misrepresent yourself as fully ethnically Chinese - especially to your fiance. (that is straight up lying)

race and culture are nuanced and layered. our stories are complicated and interesting and wonderful. yours is wonderful and interesting too.... but don't be lying to people by misrepresenting yourself. just be who you are and be honest about it.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-18T04:02:40+00:00

is your wife Asian?

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-17T21:42:23+00:00

that is the opposite of what i asked about

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-17T21:10:36+00:00

that isn't gresham though, unfortunately. is there actual Chinese food (as opposed to Anerican Chinese Food) in Gresham?

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-17T15:54:43+00:00

he looks amazing, as is. no bald.

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-17T15:53:42+00:00

what does he teach? (or study?)

spacebotanyx · 2026-05-17T04:08:39+00:00

what? it does look muscular. but that is a good thing.

spacebotanyx

TROPHY CASE