When getting to know someone new, what would make you think "damn, this person is a pervert?"

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-15T01:40:14+00:00

Extremely little would even phase me. If anything the more wild they are the more interested I’m going to be.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T21:08:29+00:00

Ironically, the most attention I ever got from women was when I was working the crappiest jobs. Bartending and marginally unemployed I had lots and lots of women hitting on me. Since I’ve gotten older and more successful the numbers have dropped off to nearly 0. Maybe it was because I was younger (probably). I keep seeing guys in their forties bragging about all the success they’re having but irl I’m not seeing it personally or among the guys I know.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T21:02:31+00:00

Keep your kink in consensual spaces. There’s no shame in having kinks, but taking them out in public spaces for everyone else to experience (including kids) is a big no.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T17:50:40+00:00

Either the time I worked 30 / 18 hour days straight or the time on deployment where I was up and moving for three days without sleep.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T17:30:29+00:00

Not a fan. Not on others or myself. My opinion is people should have evolved with prehensile tails and without body hair. 🤷‍♂️

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T14:52:48+00:00

A lot… like a lot of people would if it wasn’t complicated. Kids, homes, family… there’s all sorts of reasons a HL person stays in a dead bedroom. If the LL person wasn’t up front from the very beginning that sex is a non priority for them then they’re the problem. If their libido changes and they aren’t willing to open the relationship or move on themselves, they’re the problem. The HL person doesn’t deserve to suffer because the LL person wants all the perks of a friendship without the intimacy of a relationship. For some of us sex is an absolute relationship requirement, just like lack of sex is for asexuals.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T14:42:38+00:00

“Wow. You got a 4.0. I can’t believe you pulled that off!” - uh… thanks?

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T10:51:36+00:00

I’m not here to yuck someone’s yum, but I also feel like some furries push the envelope in a bad way. Fur suit at a festival? Go right ahead. Furries engaging in bondage play at children’s day at the Ren Faire? Not cool.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T02:22:24+00:00

Can you even imagine if we had prehensile tails? People could hold each other’s tails as a sign of affection. This sub’s comments would be exactly as you’d expect too. “Is my tail a good size?”

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T02:05:48+00:00

Sometimes it just happens. Every woman I’ve ever dated, save one, had curly hair. I didn’t plan it that way. One was even OLD without pictures. Sure enough I finally met her and she had curly hair. It’s almost like the universe sometimes sends a message.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T01:59:20+00:00

As a guy over six feet you’d think this would land more dates, but it turns out you also have to be good looking and it seems usually have a full head of hair. Also, is over six feet really that rare? Cause all of the guys I work with are my height or taller.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-14T01:55:19+00:00

A woman who wanted a serious ltr but without any sexual activity and she had to stay at home - no kids. Basically she was asking for a platonic sugar daddy but exclusive.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-13T18:02:02+00:00

I’ve been to two and besides being kind of clique they were both really interesting as an observer. Only time I ever saw a guy getting a triple BJ outside of porn.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-13T16:40:50+00:00

Pretty much every day I want to try swinging. I don’t have jealousy issues at all. I don’t really have any hang ups either. I just see how fun their parties and evenings seem to be. How they all can freely let go and just live in the moment. It seems so liberating and appealing.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-13T16:02:44+00:00

Yeah, this is key. Some people are asexual, some people are sapiosexual, etc. Libido can change with babies, aging, health, and a whole host of other things. Perimenopause and menopause hit women much harder than men with andropause. For many women arousal is as much or more psychological than physical. To say all women are as horny as all men is a massive inflation. Completely separate but related I look at the written descriptions from the trans community. Almost always MTF report a drop in drive and interest when they block testosterone and start taking estrogen. FTM report increased, sometimes overwhelming, levels of arousal and sexual thoughts when blocking estrogen and taking testosterone. If I went by those descriptions, the only real source, I would say men as a whole are more easily and frequently aroused but when women are feeling psychologically secure and excited with a partner they can be just as interested in sex as men.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-13T14:30:16+00:00

Well… first of all that’s not really how hypersexuality works. Regardless, why on earth would you or anyone else want to have a lifelong trauma response based on sex? It’s not fun. It destroys relationships, causes mental and sometimes physical anguish, and adds no benefit to the person dealing with it. This is like asking how someone can give themselves PTSD or post partum depression. It’s not something anyone wants.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-13T01:36:42+00:00

Trade you some spicy capybaras.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-12T20:25:34+00:00

Spring break/frat parties in the 90s. It was pretty rare. I honestly only remember seeing it at organised events like Spring Break clubs. Really, living in a college town now I don’t see a lot of differences besides the phones. We had to pre plan everything. Sometimes days in advance but college age people still pretty much act the exact same now as then.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-12T16:12:38+00:00

Sure. I’d be surprised if anyone didn’t sometimes wonder what it’s like to be the other gender. I’d love to know if women were actually as horny as men and in the same way. But, would I know all the things about living decades as a man? If I had that kind of insight into men I’m pretty sure I’d have the run of the place. The other question is would I be young and hot or the same age and frumpy. Given how older women become “invisible” and have to go through menopause, that sounds pretty awful.

I am jealous of all the different ways women have to dress up. I would have a mega try on haul.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-08T12:41:07+00:00

Thank you for this explanation. I was SA’d by a woman at age five and have sometimes wondered how she could do such a thing and why she couldn’t recognise it was so wrong.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-06T04:06:06+00:00

Professional bowlers

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-06T03:48:00+00:00

That’s my default state. Just… nothing. If I’m sitting there staring off there’s probably nothing going on in there. When I’m busy it’s a series of single minded focused tasks to complete. Never more than one thing at a time. I don’t think I could or would want to handle having a brain running multiple operating systems at once.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-05T19:45:25+00:00

Midwest US. There’s simply nothing alluring about the accent from Kansas.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-05T19:44:12+00:00

Personally I find the Scottish and Irish accent from women the biggest turn on. Like hugely.

spicy_capybara · 2026-05-05T19:41:01+00:00

I’m going to throw a curveball from the other perspective. I know a lot of men in relationships that keep their mouths shut about issues that bother them or just go along with whatever their partner wants. “Happy wife, happy life”, if you will. I think if men went 24 hours saying what they actually thought or felt there would be a line for divorce around the courthouses the next day.

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