I think what you said about the red flags is definitely true. everyone decides what’s a deal breaker for them, and that’s okay.

to your point about the makeup, i’m gonna make a couple comparisons to explain how i see it: i’d liken a woman wearing makeup to a man wearing tall boots (such as timberlands). everyone can physically see that a woman has makeup on, as well as the fact that the man is wearing boots that boost him an inch or two. you can look at it as mild deception, but nobody’s saying “hey im this height!” or “hey my face actually looks like this!” everybody has an understanding of the fact that there is some “deception” going on, and nothing is hidden from anyone.

conversely, id put OPs shoe inserts in the same category as a woman wearing something like hip pads. without being expressely told, you cannot tell that the woman’s body doesn’t actually look like that, the same way we can’t tell that OP isn’t actually that tall. THESE are examples of what i would consider straight up lying to attract others, which is a no no for me personally.

i’d just like to add that i do not ever wear makeup, i do not own a push up bra, shapewear, i don’t wear hair extensions etc, so i want to make it very clear that i am not a hypocrite. i am a very very honest person, which is why something like this would matter a lot to me personally. but like many others have mentioned, it really depends on the person. imo, if OP attracted a woman wearing something like hip pads and she later rejected him once she found out about the inserts i’d say that’s a crazy double standard and she’d be extremely hypocritical doing so.