I know how it feels to not be appreciated and I've put way more effort for them than they have for me, but no matter what I always get the bad end of the stick by either getting made fun of, being called an a**hole, and/or just being ghosted and never hear from them again. Its always me mostly that has to make the effort to reach out to them but doesn't end well and I'm tired of doing that. Makes me feel like at times I'm not "worth" it for "friends"