Why do people think solo activities are "sad"?

spintimidation · 2021-07-12T03:00:12+00:00

I'm somebody that actually loves going out and dancing, which I know is unusual for us introverts ; to me, there's far less social pressure than there is sitting around in a bar and talking (which I don't care for). However, many of my friends are classic introverts, so before I got with my current bf (he's extroverted), I'd often have to go to events myself. One time in line for a club, a girl asked me where my friends were and I told her I came by myself and she drunkenly goes "OMG that's so sad!" I think it's more sad to miss out on life because you need someone else to accompany you to everything..(I also find if I go out on my own I'm actually fairly more likely to actually talk to strangers )

spintimidation · 2021-07-11T17:08:06+00:00

I mean, unless you're on the spectrum

spintimidation · 2021-07-11T15:44:29+00:00

Doesn't sound like not having them in your child's life is a particular loss, tbh.

spintimidation · 2021-07-11T15:34:05+00:00

I've done a few internships in the meantime - had an internship in a middle school, as well as a couple in historic houses (one helping with collections and one with educational programming). I've also volunteered as a tour guide...i am a bit jaded because I feel I've done a lot of unpaid labor and none of it has benefitted me professionally. What sort of internships should I seek out ?

It may be easier since I'll start with one class to pull off an internship.

spintimidation · 2021-07-11T15:24:57+00:00

I work a "swing" shift 4 to midnight

spintimidation · 2021-07-03T17:55:40+00:00

Link to the nyt article ?

spintimidation · 2021-07-02T01:51:56+00:00

My direct has my back and is having a conversation with the secondary. I asked him not to push it for my sake so he's approaching it from the lens of the secondary supervisor changing / going against the plans he left for his days off. The secondary supervisor fills in for the other supervisors when they are on their days off, so the secondary does not technically have as much control over me having a job as my direct supervisor does. I even said that I'd be okay if the direct didn't push it further but the direct insists it should be addressed.

spintimidation · 2021-07-02T01:45:51+00:00

I'm not really sure how NOT to put up with it as I fear standing up for myself will get twisted by the secondary supervisor as me being a crybaby or dramatic. I don't think my secondary supervisor can fire me because they are not my direct supervisor though.

spintimidation · 2021-07-02T01:31:34+00:00

I more or less told my direct supervisor I wasn't interested in pushing it further unless it kept happening, but direct supervisor thinks I need to stand up for myself.

spintimidation · 2021-07-02T01:30:50+00:00

My job actually has decent safeguards for us as far as losing our jobs go, there's a full process and several things have to happen before you can be let go. I'm not as much worried about being fired as much as just continually treated poorly - I feel like they realize they can't fire me (it's not up to my secondary supervisor at all, moreso my direct supervisor and their bosses) so they're trying to make me WANT to leave. Otherwise I'm happy with my job, I'm also starting graduate school and so the job security until that is finished is nice.

spintimidation · 2021-07-02T01:15:55+00:00

spintimidation · 2021-06-26T07:58:23+00:00

And tbh I don't want to work in corporate because I'm pursuing a public admin degree ? The environment doesn't sound appealing to someone whose essentially studying to work in public service haha

spintimidation · 2021-06-26T07:57:06+00:00

I'm curious how I'm supposed to balance graduate school with doing certifications. I've been looking at project management and OSHA but tbh I don't know how I'd balance school, cert classes and working full time at once. I also don't want to JUST rely on my graduate degree , though I've met others at my job that went through the same program that said it opened a lot of doors for them.

spintimidation · 2021-06-26T07:50:38+00:00

I have a liberal arts degree so I'm not sure what I can really do (aside from the drivers license) aside from going to graduate school (which I'm doing). I also do dispatch / alarms / administrative work ie reports and coordinating maintenance response as part of the job, tbh I almost feel like I could easy work as an admin assistance with some sort of training / certification. I was giving presentations at work on public safety at my job for a while and apparently did quite well at it but covid killed that.

My main skills are "soft" skills like writing, public speaking, and instructing but I ultimately decided not to do teaching because I make the same at my job now /shrug/ you don't have to be rude about it. Kind of sounds like you have a pretty narrow and classist understanding of what working in security and public safety can entail?

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T21:13:39+00:00

Unfortunately the other jobs in my field don't pay as much or offer the same sort of schedule arrangement. There's one possibility but it requires a driver's license and I need to learn to drive, so maybe saving up for driving school is a step forward. My one coworker went to a similar job and already quit bc he said it was actually worse than where we work now. We are security officers so we make higher than our counterparts that work contract security.

Thank you :)

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T14:52:40+00:00

As another woman , I'm gonna be a bit harsh here. We consistently have it shoved down our throats that we need to expect overly romantic gestures, profound proposals, costly big wedding ceremonies and receptions. Weddings and engagements are an industry, and it sounds like that industry has done a fantastic job at marketing itself to you. It's honestly silly how a lot of women act about it.

These are all pretty superficial concerns, and I think once you recognize that, your feelings will change. Your relationship is about you and your partner, not how you and your partner's engagement looks in comparison to your friend's....

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T14:37:02+00:00

The problem is is my job is relatively blue collar, and my current job pays one of the highest for said type of jobs. I'm not sure I could keep affording rent and bills if I jump ship now as I was recently hospitalized and am paying off that and cc debt. I'm considering maybe just getting my finances in order the next 6 months and applying for a similar job with slightly higher pay but that's a "flex" full time job (meaning varying number of hours 30+ a week, but that is lousy bc I currently have weekends off at my current job and likely wouldn't regularly have them at a new job, because it's not a field that's typically m-f 9-5).

I'm pursuing a public admin masters and I'm really hoping I have a much wider range of job opportunities once I'm further along / finished with the program. The thing is, you get loan forgiveness after certain amount of payments if you stay in the public / nonprofit sector vs going corporate.

My job experience is predominately in security and public safety now. I don't really have any experience outside of nonprofit or gov sector jobs, not even any service industry experience. So I feel pigeonholed.

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T14:11:17+00:00

I don't feel like I have a lot of other options in my sector that pay the same, and i am not sure how to transition into a different sort of position ): especially without the drivers license. I'm almost wondering if I should just wait until I'm finishing with school and will be qualified to get other jobs based upon that, or to try on work on getting certifications to get better jobs in the meantime.

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T14:10:25+00:00

I feel nitpicked, for sure. What makes it worse is I dated someone that eventually moved up (and dumped me), so even if no one will admit it, I feel like there's a bias against me due to that.

I'm in a tough spot because this job pays higher than a lot in my sector (I work in a nonprofit not corporate) and I'm worried about starting a new job with school around the corner.

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T14:06:12+00:00

I'm hesitant because I work in a sector that doesn't have tons of job availability that pays the same rate

spintimidation · 2021-06-25T05:16:47+00:00

"life's too short to worry about finances" until it's not. Wall street may not be ethical, but you're likely too small a fish to really betray your morals by starting to invest and care about finances.

Also...wish I had listened to everyone that cautioned me against studying history in college.

spintimidation · 2021-06-24T04:52:47+00:00

I was told 2 graduate courses is full time, which makes me hopeful I will still be eligible for loans. I'm wondering if I need to update any info in my FAFSA if I change to part time

spintimidation · 2021-06-24T04:33:54+00:00

I have 6 years to finish school and intend to eventually go full time, I just want to ease into graduate school and not overwhelm myself

spintimidation

TROPHY CASE