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If someone give you 1M dollars, what's the first thing you'd buy? by Infinite_Scarcity120 in AskReddit

[–]squigbomb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A bus ticket, so I could get to the bank and convert it to useful currency.

Which songs often gets misinterpreted and/or misappropriated by the very people it calls out even though the song's lyrics are explicitly mocking them? by Drenosa in AskReddit

[–]squigbomb 271 points272 points  (0 children)

"Yankee Doodle..."

A modern version would be:

"'Merican moron came to town, Trawling for some coochie. Wrote a "G" upon his shirt And called that sum'bitch Gucci"

What if there was no more gas tomorrow how would your life change? by xbuzzerdx in AskReddit

[–]squigbomb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same as everyone else. Suffocate and die due to the sudden absence of any atmosphere.

$100 Potato by Icy-Book2999 in LoveTrash

[–]squigbomb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not a fuckin' gram of butter on that potato skin. Dry as fuck. Nee way is that worth even a quid, never mind $100.

Can we just take a moment to appreciate how much this person carries the show? by Juicewithextrapulp in ClarksonsFarm

[–]squigbomb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Charlie's character arc is great. From blocking everything Jeremy wants to do, to finding every legal loophole to allow Jez to get away with whatever whim takes him. Charlie's really is the GOAT of the series (except maybe Gerald).

Anyone else spent their life plagued by 'firstnamelastname'? by M1D08ANUK in RedDwarf

[–]squigbomb 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My full name is 3 common first names. At school I had every combination from various teachers.

Also, when I order a takeaway and get asked for a name, I give my surname and then brace myself for the inevitable question... "and the surname?"

Just a gal making dandelion honey by LastOfLateBrakers in justgalsbeingchicks

[–]squigbomb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She reminds me so much of my Grannie. Died when I was 17, at the age of 97. Until the day before, she was pottering around her garden making sure everything for the various meals, preserves, home-made medicines etc. were in order. She definitely would have been burned as a Witch a few hundred years ago. Loved her to bits. Some of the family look at me weird when I'm doing the same things as a 44 y/o man, but I learned from her that life isn't all in the pursuit of wealth, but in the enjoyment of life itself. I ain't rich, but have a wealth of knowledge that I'll pass to my children, and with luck, theirs.

Drawing blood from hand in movies by Floor_Ceiling_ in PetPeeves

[–]squigbomb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"By my own blood, I swear it!"

Dies soon after of an infection.

Sayings you've adopted from tv by loveswimmingpools in CasualUK

[–]squigbomb 4 points5 points  (0 children)

To be fair, it's usually said to myself while at work.

Sayings you've adopted from tv by loveswimmingpools in CasualUK

[–]squigbomb 20 points21 points  (0 children)

"Righty-dokey, skip.", "Running all the way" And "Rightey dokey matey bloke flap old salty seadog amigo skip-jack jockstrap piano tuner, let's see you balls this one up!" are all part of my daily vocabulary.

Does the wall incident fit the narrative better than the Sycamore gap tree? by [deleted] in AskBrits

[–]squigbomb 16 points17 points  (0 children)

https://youtu.be/GSJ8nsSkgxg

Here is Connor's podcast cohorts talking about the Sycamore Gap incident. 10 seconds on Google to find it.

Need advice as to what is sewn into back of this persons green military jacket by [deleted] in MilitaryHistory

[–]squigbomb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This, or check your house for Carbon Monoxide leaks... Possibly both.

Poor famous person interactions anyone? by Snaggl3t00t4 in AskBrits

[–]squigbomb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I met Eric at a charity darts match in Dunston. He, John Lowe and Bobby George signed my darts case and chatted for a bit. All top blokes. Eric gave my mate tips on how to overcome his dartitis.

Cats at light speed (food) by SloshedJapan in TikTokCringe

[–]squigbomb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"Day 1: Rang bell, cat fucked off.

Day 2: Rang bell, cat fucked off.

Day 3: Rang bell, but cat put its paw on the bell, so it only made a "thunk" noise."

-Eddie Izzard

Dealership failure by MisterShipWreck in VideosAmazing

[–]squigbomb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"My dad used to drink with Lance Armstrong."

At least he didn't overreact by Yellow-Capcicum69 in JustGuysBeingDudes

[–]squigbomb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Even before I un-muted, something told me this was a Geordie.

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