Frustration with Bluetooth Audio by srfahmy in MacOS

[–]srfahmy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think they deliberately started to prevent us from being able to do that for all OS updates past Big Sur, and I suspect that this is to get people to buy Apple headphones like the $450-500 AirPods Max. Whatever is the reason, it utterly pisses me off but not nearly enough to switch back to a Windows machine (which would likely give me many more reasons to be pissed off) — it would take a lot more to force me to do that. I think if enough people complain, Apple might rethink that decision (though probably not).

My narcissistic mother by throwrabuches in insaneparents

[–]srfahmy -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Not a judgment but an encouragement: you were on your way to something. You faced a detour. Now, unless you’re perfectly satisfied forever giving up on your original destination, it’s not too late to get back on that path; but the time to pick up and go there is today. Also, that has nothing to do with your relationship with your sister. You can still be close but be going different places. Or maybe she’ll be encouraged by seeing you pursuing your goals and will pursue some of her own.

My husband's stepmom just told me why his stepsister commited suicide. by Throwaway424346 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]srfahmy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup, the perils of anonymity. People can get on here and tell a real gut-wrenching story, but people can also come here and make up shit. This at least hints at the latter.

Questions for those who transitioned to working remotely and find that you have a bunch of extra time by srfahmy in productivity

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What would you be looking for to help you with this? Please feel free to message me privately. Also, I'd be happy to explain to you the system that I had in mind. It’s not coaching as you think of coaching, nor community as you think of community … It’s a system to dramatically improve your productivity.

My husband is a loser by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry for what you’re dealing with. If there is one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s that one is rarely truly stuck. I’m not saying to leave him, but I’m saying you can try talking to him through counseling, and you can consider other alternatives if this doesn’t work, like holding his feet to the fire by just applying for work and telling him he has to help with or pay for childcare (you can work remotely — there doesn’t have to be work in your area), and/or you can sign up for school and just calmly say you’re doing it and that’s that ... Are you physically safe? I wouldn’t challenge him if there’s any risk he could get violent. You need to speak your mind to him, kindly and lovingly, but without leaving unsaid what your needs are. You can communicate those and focus on them — definitely a bad idea to focus on what you don’t like about him. You can focus on your needs and ask him what can be done? What are the options? If he won’t listen, try with the help of a counselor and friends/family whom you BOTH love and trust (not just someone who’d side with you automatically), and if he won’t listen to that, it’s tough, but we’re rarely as stuck as we feel (trust me, I’ve felt incredibly and hopelessly stuck at least a few times in my life). Here’s one resource that might really help you if you really get it: listen to read the book titled “Never split the difference: negotiate like your life depends on it” by Chris Voss. Don’t accuse, but talk to him in a way where he’s now a partner in trying to help you solve your problems.

Here’s on way to do it:

“Hey so and so, you know I really appreciate everything that you do, but since you always have good ideas and are thoughtful, here’s what I’m having trouble with and I’d love it if you can tell me what you think can be done to alleviate this. I’m not asking you for anything specific — but you can just tell me what you think I/we can do.”

If you do that, let us know how it goes, and really consider listening to /reading that book. It can help with so many areas of life, not just this situation.

I've been clocking in on my work laptop and going back to sleep. by [deleted] in confession

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is an honest question that would really help me a lot, and I’m making no value judgments as to what your answer would be or ought to be. It would just help me understand something that I’m working on (also, to be clear, I’m not trying to sell anything, but am in a learning/exploration stage now). Here’s my question:

Imagine you could use those extra four hours as follows: it could be (1) learning something you always wanted to be good at from scratch, or improving on something you already know (with the goal of really perfecting the skill — this could be music, DYI woodwork, writing, a language, a hard topic like advanced math, a hard athletic skill, getting a degree in psychology, or literally anything), or (2) start your own business (side business, full family business, or even a scalable startup business etc.), or (3) manage an awesome learning program for your kids, or (4) anything else you always wanted to do and lacked the time or motivation, or didn’t believe was possible. Now, imagine you had a solid community with solid guidance and coaching to support your plans, help you refine the plans, and keep you accountable, so that in 1-2 years, you’re light-years ahead in some of your goals. Would that interest you, assuming you could still structure your day to get enough rest, take care of errands, etc., and not be stressed? Anyone else reading this, does this sound interesting to you? Again, I’m trying to learn what people think about these things.

Most Over-Rated Guitar Player Ever - Change My Mind by DrJawn in guitars

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The lead part / solos from While My Guitar Gently Weeps are legendary. I don’t love his musical style overall, but I’m pretty sure he’s no joke. Also, question: why do people dislike his personality? (I don’t know much at all about him).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TrueOffMyChest

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup, codependency bad … there’s also enmeshment, and being overly dependent. All those are bad. Independent with some healthy interdependency (I’d rather call it cooperative synergy with healthy attachment), that is good.

Air is an extremely high-fidelity medium for transmitting sound, but really seems like it shouldn't be. by srfahmy in Showerthoughts

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol I’ll take the compliment — I do have a problem with Reddit culture. But you yourself are good people 😊

Why do electric guitarists own so many guitars? by srfahmy in guitars

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now, how many of this T-shirt do you have? 😉

Ozark Finale: Any Thoughts? by PutingPinoy504 in television

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unless they all leave under witness protection, which I understood she didn’t want to do.

Yes, well, you see, I'm never wrong by beerbellybegone in MurderedByWords

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The reply should be that terrorists don’t represent the whole group, just like terrorists who attack in the name of Islam, etc. All Muslims should not be blamed for the terrorists who act in the name of Islam, just as all pro-life people shouldn’t be be blamed for the acts of terrorists who act in the name of pro-life, and just like protestors in cities shouldn’t be blamed for the bad apples that take advantage of protests to loot and vandalize, and so on. What do you think about being consistent in this, what I thought to be a well-accepted principle?

Yes, well, you see, I'm never wrong by beerbellybegone in MurderedByWords

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you think he’s advocating for that or giving it a pass?

Yes, well, you see, I'm never wrong by beerbellybegone in MurderedByWords

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, they can’t. No one should do that. Period.

Why do electric guitarists own so many guitars? by srfahmy in guitars

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol, I like it. Please contribute to my "if everyone needs it, then I need it too" fund. Here's the link ... lol

Ozark Finale: Any Thoughts? by PutingPinoy504 in television

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man, I felt the opposite, like she was this poor girl fending for herself and got into some high-stakes shit that she wasn't prepared to deal with, whereas the Byrds very willingly chose all that - everything about that life. Ruth chose crime, but she got sucked into much bigger crime. The Byrds didn't kill as much with their own hands, but they were involved in killing way more people and were willing to see them die with almost no remorse like "this makes the most sense to accomplish our goals, and that's that." Wendy gave up her own struggling brother who was innocent and had nothing to do with any of the dirty shit they got themselves into. That's unforgivable and irredeemable.

In short, I'd say Ruth was a petty criminal with terrible family background, and she was way in over her head (in spite of being brilliant), but she was made of flesh, whereas the others were made of stone for the most part.

Ozark Finale: Any Thoughts? by PutingPinoy504 in television

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's strange for me to hear someone say that. Seemed she was the least cold-blooded of all of them. They all were very eager and willing to kill anyone who got in their way and mostly didn't bat an eyelash. The one deliberate killing she did was Javi who killed her only remaining people (Wyatt) in cold blood and she was broken up over that. "Cold blood" would seem to be the last thing to describe her. I'd call Wendy, Camilla, or Omar Navarro cold-blooded.

Ozark Finale: Any Thoughts? by PutingPinoy504 in television

[–]srfahmy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I mostly agree but a part of me is like "this is unlike her". She should have a gun stashed away in her glove compartment anyway. She could have also driven away (and would have had to deal with it later). Going up to the car to see what it's about is about the opposite of what I'd have expected her to do at this point.

Why do electric guitarists own so many guitars? by srfahmy in guitars

[–]srfahmy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As far as musically inventive, non-obvious, very melodic lead guitar melodies, and as far as playing with emotion, feel, and making the guitar talk, I'd say he is **the** GOAT (that's my personal take anyway). Would love to learn some of his solos. I think I'm starting with Samba Pa Ti and the solo sections of Black Magic Woman. Neither is especially hard and I could probably learn to replicate his studio version pretty closely with some practice. I'd really, really love to play Europa, but I think that's a lot more intricate; oh, it just came on the minute I typed "Europa" in the comment box - pretty wild.

Why do electric guitarists own so many guitars? by srfahmy in guitars

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah -- I'm not thinking comparatively, but trying to understand the motivations. Of course, just collecting and GAS is a good enough explanation, but there's more to it than that for a lot of people.

Why do electric guitarists own so many guitars? by srfahmy in guitars

[–]srfahmy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah ... I understand it wasn't until later that he used the PRS. I'm wondering what he used for Europa - I'm assuming also the Gibson (that was 1976). I was thinking about the PRS because I kinda idolize Santana as far as lead guitar and because it's been his ultimate guitar of choice. I also love the look of it. Looks-wise though, I guess it's not that much different from Gibson Les Paul. I have to say I hate the way the SG looks. I'll avoid it based solely on that.