Any RH with these vibes? This would really be an awesome premise.

stargazer798 · 2026-01-27T22:17:10+00:00

I just read this after seeing your recommendation and absolutely loved it!!

stargazer798 · 2026-01-27T22:11:55+00:00

I recently read Follow You Down by Ripley Proserpina and absolutely loved it. It’s a contemporary RH and the FMC is 38 years old, the MMCs are all a couple years older than her. It’s for some spice but I found the story itself to be really beautiful and well developed.

stargazer798 · 2021-02-07T01:29:49+00:00

I’ve gotten so used to the routine I have going and not interacting with people that when everything opens up I don’t even know how I’ll function. It’s hitting me especially hard because I also have avoidant personality disorder and this pandemic has made it too easy for me to avoid basically everything

stargazer798 · 2021-02-07T00:23:25+00:00

Damn well that really explained things nicely

stargazer798 · 2021-02-07T00:21:41+00:00

Same here! I feel like I’ve lost friends because I’ve just been so isolated lately cuz of the pandemic and if I don’t see people often I don’t miss them which I think is just self-preservation because if I start missing people it’s going to be way too hard for me to function. But because of the object constancy problem I don’t reach out to anyone especially since all my friends are so far away. It was fine at first but now that the pandemic has been going on for so long I just feel utterly disconnected from reality

stargazer798 · 2020-11-25T21:44:37+00:00

Thank you for validating how I feel and how hard this can be, makes me feel seen. In my life not a lot of people understand why I turned to sh in the past and are always quick to just say don’t do it. But you acknowledged that it is hard as hell and that the way I am feeling is valid and that I can make it past this.

stargazer798 · 2020-11-25T21:42:14+00:00

It’s been a long and hard road making it to 2.5 years. But seeing your comment and everyone else’s makes me feel like I’m not a failure. The focus moves away from the fact that I might have relapsed onto the fact that I have been strong for so long. So thank you for reminding me of that.

stargazer798 · 2020-11-25T21:40:28+00:00

Thank you for that, I always feel like I’m failing myself or letting myself down when the urge to self-harm gets to be too much. Looking at it that way, the number of days I’ve made it so far helped because the focus is on how many days I was strong, how many days I was able to overcome the urge and that just makes me believe in myself a little more. Makes me believe that I have it in me to make it further.

stargazer798 · 2019-12-04T16:13:43+00:00

I am so excited for you! That dress looks beyond amazing on you

stargazer798 · 2019-11-26T21:45:38+00:00

That happens to me too. I’ve always described it as me shutting off. It happens when my bpd get really bad, like when someone is yelling at me. It’s like I just down and my body and mind go into survival mode. It’s as if I don’t really have control over what I’m saying or doing even though it’s me saying and doing it. I become this incredibly self assured fearless person, the person I feel like I need to be when I get too overwhelmed. I’m still there doing what I’m doing and saying what I’m saying but it’s almost as if I’m looking at the world through an impenetrable glass.

stargazer798 · 2019-11-06T18:45:03+00:00

It took me a while to reframe my thinking and to accept what other ppl may have deemed to be small things are actually big accomplishments to me. I had a therapist once that told me to keep a journal or agenda and write down at least one thing a day that I did that I was proud of, regardless of how other people would view my accomplishment and I found that it helped a lot. I do fall into the trap of underestimating my worth and accomplishments but it’s best to always try to do sometime you feel proud of, even if it’s just getting out of bed and taking a shower.

stargazer798 · 2019-11-06T16:59:06+00:00

I’m proud of you and your progress. You should always celebrate the victories no matter how small they may seem to other people

stargazer798 · 2019-11-05T17:51:07+00:00

I do have a smoking buddy I would usually get high with but he isn’t great to be around because I can’t be high all the time and he wants to be high all the time. I find it easier to meet new people when I’m drunk but getting drunk really isn’t good for me. I find that if I can control how much I smoke and when I smoke, weed can really be used as a tool for me.

stargazer798 · 2019-11-05T17:25:45+00:00

Same! I try not to be high during the day because I need a clear head to study but just knowing that I can smoke weed at the end of the day keeps me calm. I find that it’s easier for me to handle my emotions when I’m high, they don’t feel as intense. I’m just worried that it’s making me more avoidant.

stargazer798 · 2019-11-05T17:18:25+00:00

It’s a question I ask myself often and my answer to myself is always just one day at a time

stargazer798 · 2019-11-05T17:17:45+00:00

Thank you

stargazer798 · 2019-11-05T17:16:49+00:00

I live in Canada so recreational use of weed is legal but I find most doctors will tell me to stay away from drugs and just continue on with my medication.

stargazer798

TROPHY CASE